Class for your Ass

If ever there were a time to feel like a classy babe about butt-sex, now is one of them. Wicked Jelle advertises itself as a sleek, water-based lubricant fit for your haute derrière, and they've done a fine job selling me on it. Best of all, it's not at all confined simply to backdoor shenanigans; sex, masturbation, anal...all's fair in love and lubricant, baby!

Because of its thicker consistency, it takes precious little to overdo it, so if you plan to apply this to the clitoris in particular, be conservative with your measurements or find yourself without sensation before you even get things heated up. On the other hand, always be generous with lube when participating in any kind of anal play to avoid injury.

Whether you're a solo flyer or have a co-pilot, back-door navigator or getting frisky up front, this is a solid and versatile choice of water-based lubricant.

The texture does its best to mimic a silicone-based lube while retaining all the great features of water-based lubes. It has a thicker viscosity and will not spread much, if at all, when dispensed into your hand. It comes out as a gel, but kind of melts as you work it in. It does not get sticky or leave a noticeable residue, which is awesome unless you prefer to masturbate/have sex with the lubricant equivalent of maple syrup (please don't do that).

When applied directly to toys, the lubricant will slide around a little, so it may be best to apply it to your hand first and rub it between your palms to avoid an awkward glop on your carpet.

There is no discernible smell to the lubricant, but taste is another story. I tasted a little (for SCIENCE!) and found that it's about as foul as one might expect. It's got a bitter, almost metallic taste to it that I have come to expect from a lot of lubes; it's not completely intolerable, but it's no treat on its own, either. Stick to penetration - either by toy, by genitalia, or by digits - and you won't fare the same ugly fate as my own tastebuds.

This lube lasted a respectable amount of time, especially for a water-based. How long it lasts will ultimately depend partially on how much you use at a time, but I typically only need to reapply once within an hour or hour and a half long session with about a nickel-sized amount. Not too shabby, I say, but your mileage will vary with how naturally lubricated you are at the time, as well.

I didn't really have to wash any kind of film or residue away, which is a total plus. I found that it absorbed into my skin handily and when in use, felt as natural as if it had come from my own body. If you find excess on your body, a simple wipe-down with water will serve just fine.

The brand obviously sells an image that's dark, sexy, and sleek. The design is part of what first caught my eye and made me consider this lube, as it's not often that you come across a well-designed, almost artful bottle of something you use to facilitate putting things in your ass. Kudos to Wicked Jelle for bridging that gap.

The packaging is fairly discreet at a distance because of its smart and minimal design. This bottle could probably pass for lotion or face-cream, if only it didn't blatantly say what it's for on the front of it. If a person doesn't look closely at it, they likely wouldn't notice this as something out of the ordinary.