Sexual Health » Body & Body Image, Women's Health: "SexIs Subjective: Whether thin or fat, the key to our happiness is how we see ourselves and how we feel."

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SexIs Subjective: Whether thin or fat, the key to our happiness is how we see ourselves and how we feel.
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After a lifetime attempting to love myself despite my rail thin frame, psych meds made me gain 70 lbs and my self esteem sunk. It was now time to love my rolls instead of my bones, which was very confusing to my already damaged psyche, but a little self care goes a long way and now dancing to get fit fills my heart with joy and my muscles with strength.



Oh my! I'm officially hooked on your articles. I love them. This was wonderful, and I can't tell you how admirable you are for really letting these things out in the open. I loved this article. You, like me, sort of know BOTH sides of the story (being thicker and being super thin). I really like that you pointed out how when you were so small, it still hurt to have people refer to your size almost as a bad thing. I know many people dont' understand how, but I often get tired of hearing those things too, about being small. I certainly don't mind someone commenting on anything about me whether it's something they consider a flaw and want to bring to my attention kindly or something they want to compliment me on (definitely prefer the latter though! Lol). However, when people comment on my smallish size, especially when I was extremely small -- 70 pounds -- it got to be overwhelming as hell! I can think of one woman in particular, she was a friend until things got out of hand, but when we would all hang out in public, she'd loudly yell something about how I MUST be anorexic and my family doesn't feed me well. She would say things in such, such a rude, borderline hateful manner that I began feeling pretty bad and would avoid her at all costs. She was a lady older than me, but we were friends for a while. She was actually one of my best girlfriend's moms. It got to the point where once she said in front of all our friends and my partner "God! You look almost dead. How does he stand being with a skinny pole. My girls actually have bodies, honey." It hurt my feelings so bad that I never spoke to her in lengthy conversation again, and now, we're not friends at all.

I do wish people would realize that hatefulness about weight, no matter the size, is hurtful. I have been thick and I have been deathly skinny (due to illness, which I'm totally recovering from for the past year! Yay) but I realized that while I did enjoy finally being called small for the first time in my life, the hatefullness parts were just as hurtful as when I was called fat. So sometimes it's a blessing to have been on both ends of the... scale? And I do understand self loathing. Oh far too well. But people tend to forget that even if someone is small, any kind of mean comments whether about weight or not, are hurtful.

Sorry. Looks like I'm going on and on. Anyways, I also applaud you for being open about addiction and your recovery, which I must say congratulations! Huge congrats on something that big. Now, I'll shut up in a second, but do you mind my asking how you'd feel about doing an article on something along the lines of "helpful tips for recovery?" I think that'd be really nice to see, especially from someone who's accomplished it. You're one hell of a woman! I wouldn't mind learning more.



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