BDSM what it means to you.

Contributor: TheToyGuy TheToyGuy
I just want to chat with people.

Get your thoughts on what BDSM means to you and why.

So open a dialogue and we can begin.
09/26/2015
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Contributor: OH&W, Lovebears OH&W, Lovebears
I wish I could help you. We are just a vanilla couple. Closest step that direction is some fun love taps in the rear. No cuffs, etc. I'm sure there are a few members who could start dialogue. Lol, "Superfreak" by Rick James is playing on Pandora now.
09/26/2015
Contributor: TheToyGuy TheToyGuy
Quote:
Originally posted by OH&W, Lovebears
I wish I could help you. We are just a vanilla couple. Closest step that direction is some fun love taps in the rear. No cuffs, etc. I'm sure there are a few members who could start dialogue. Lol, "Superfreak" by Rick James is playing ... more
I do hope so. Not many people seem to be into openly discussing BDSM these days.
09/27/2015
Contributor: Lvstoplay Lvstoplay
Quote:
Originally posted by TheToyGuy
I do hope so. Not many people seem to be into openly discussing BDSM these days.
Do you have any more specific questions? I'd be more than willing to help.
09/27/2015
Contributor: edeneve edeneve
People get sexual gratification from any or all:

Bondage - restricting movement

Dominant - controlling partner

Sadomasochism - hurting partner

Masochism - being hurt
09/27/2015
Contributor: TheToyGuy TheToyGuy
Quote:
Originally posted by Lvstoplay
Do you have any more specific questions? I'd be more than willing to help.
Oh I'm not looking for details, not in that sense at least.

When asked what BDSM means to me I usually refer them to my back room where I have all my toys.

BDSM is a style of play for me, a setup for a SCENE not a lifestyle I choose to live.

I'm not into "Bondage" but I'm good at the craft and so it fits into my play style.
I'm Versatile and have no desire to be a persons long term slave or have a slave of my own to dominate or look over.
I get no personal pleasure in hurting people unless they enjoy it, in which case the pain is for them not me. To much of a Nurse I guess.
And I'm not into pain for myself.

So for me that is my BDSM. An aspect I enjoy form time to time. With whips, chains and metal frames. To tease and please and have a great time.

What is your BDSM?
09/28/2015
Contributor: OH&W, Lovebears OH&W, Lovebears
Quote:
Originally posted by TheToyGuy
I do hope so. Not many people seem to be into openly discussing BDSM these days.
Maybe not here and now, but plenty elsewhere. However my lips are sealed. I'm not going to steer anyone elsewhere. At least not on purpose.
09/28/2015
Contributor: TheToyGuy TheToyGuy
Quote:
Originally posted by OH&W, Lovebears
Maybe not here and now, but plenty elsewhere. However my lips are sealed. I'm not going to steer anyone elsewhere. At least not on purpose.
Chanting: B D S M ! B D S M ! B D S M ! B D S M !
09/29/2015
Contributor: Lvstoplay Lvstoplay
Quote:
Originally posted by TheToyGuy
Oh I'm not looking for details, not in that sense at least.

When asked what BDSM means to me I usually refer them to my back room where I have all my toys.

BDSM is a style of play for me, a setup for a SCENE not a lifestyle I choose ... more
This is copied from my bio. Hopefully it answers your question.

"I'm part of the BDSM community, though I don't actually identify with any of the given labels. I would say I am somewhere between a switch and a submissive, though I hate that term. I don't like the idea of gags, severe pain, drawing blood, or humiliation. I am not interested in finding a partner or playmate, and am in what I would consider a type of 24/7 relationship. I have a Dom, who I think is amazing. He does not control me or most aspects of my life, including my finances, however our D/S relationship does affect us on a 24/7 basis. I need his consent to engage in sexual activity as well as to orgasm, even with him, and the emotional connection we share is much different than I have experienced or witnessed with any other relationship. Our punishments are more intrinsic than anything else, which is nice. He does try to reward me frequently, and I try to take care of him and see that he is rewarded for certain things as well. While it's not a type of punishment for us we do enjoy things like extended teasing, and even engaging in orgasm denial. Should you have any suggestions for teasing, different ways to touch each other, or rewards please feel free to PM them to me. I am collared, which is something I find very comforting and exciting."
11/12/2015
Contributor: TheToyGuy TheToyGuy
Quote:
Originally posted by Lvstoplay
This is copied from my bio. Hopefully it answers your question.

"I'm part of the BDSM community, though I don't actually identify with any of the given labels. I would say I am somewhere between a switch and a submissive, though ... more
Thanks for sharing.
11/13/2015
Contributor: Inquisitor Inquisitor
To me it means extended foreplay, being attentive to your partners needs, wants, desires and mental space. It means teasing, taunting and pleasing in an unconventional but equally pleasant manner. Finally, it means to me being in on a private, more intimate, secret that no one else has any idea about.

Sure, the letters BDSM have a more direct meaning and to some they only mean one thing pain. Others might feel that it is only about control, and it can be, however, I choose to see the entire spectrum of what can encompass this vast field and use its various parts to bring sexual satisfaction to my partner when we have chosen to engage in this manner.
11/13/2015
Contributor: symbiasin symbiasin
Quote:
Originally posted by edeneve
People get sexual gratification from any or all:

Bondage - restricting movement

Dominant - controlling partner

Sadomasochism - hurting partner

Masochism - being hurt
Not to mention they get sexual gratification from the weirdest things....I've seen an ad for a male over in Fetlife sticking a tube in his p--hole. And the women, they have a whole section on p--hole f--king with a needle that they shove in and out....eeeewwww.

There is also dogging which isn't what I thought it was. It's supposed to be a form of watching people have sex. Men and their dogs (dogging) would come across a couple in a car having sex, The man of course wanted to secretly snoop, so he would pretend to stop so his dog could sniff around or whatever.

Now they made it into people in a line of cars either having sex or sitting half naked offering themselves to everyone.

It makes my category about monsters not so bad.

There are others......lots more others....you name it they do it.
11/13/2015
Contributor: symbiasin symbiasin
Quote:
Originally posted by TheToyGuy
Oh I'm not looking for details, not in that sense at least.

When asked what BDSM means to me I usually refer them to my back room where I have all my toys.

BDSM is a style of play for me, a setup for a SCENE not a lifestyle I choose ... more
I'm with you there....I will not be a sub, no way no how. And no pain either!!
11/13/2015
Contributor: symbiasin symbiasin
Quote:
Originally posted by Lvstoplay
This is copied from my bio. Hopefully it answers your question.

"I'm part of the BDSM community, though I don't actually identify with any of the given labels. I would say I am somewhere between a switch and a submissive, though ... more
Some Dom is going to take my pic and explain the whole collar thing, as well as the sub thing. He says don't be in a rush to be collared (don't worry about that!)
11/13/2015
Contributor: TheToyGuy TheToyGuy
Quote:
Originally posted by symbiasin
I'm with you there....I will not be a sub, no way no how. And no pain either!!
Oh a little bit of pain, a spanking session perhaps?
11/14/2015
Contributor: babygirl87 babygirl87
Quote:
Originally posted by TheToyGuy
I just want to chat with people.

Get your thoughts on what BDSM means to you and why.

So open a dialogue and we can begin.
BDSM has so many different meanings to so many different people. To me, the most basic of those meanings is having an open dialogue with your partner about the things you need and your partner providing those needs. Typically one of the partners is more domineering while the other is more submissive, but that does not always have to be the case. I have two dominant friends who are in a committed relationship together and have been for several years, and they just play with submissives as their needs require.

Some people require a power exchange 24/7, while others don't. Personally, I am submissive in the bedroom, but not so much in my day to day life, other than with my husband. That is not to say that we are not equal in our relationship - because we still make decisions and have discussions together about what is right for our family and I am quite vocal about what I believe - that is just the dynamic of our relationship.
11/15/2015
Contributor: Lvstoplay Lvstoplay
Quote:
Originally posted by Inquisitor
To me it means extended foreplay, being attentive to your partners needs, wants, desires and mental space. It means teasing, taunting and pleasing in an unconventional but equally pleasant manner. Finally, it means to me being in on a private, more ... more
I like your answer.
06/22/2016
Contributor: Inquisitor Inquisitor
Quote:
Originally posted by Lvstoplay
I like your answer.
Thank you!
06/23/2016
Contributor: Lvstoplay Lvstoplay
Quote:
Originally posted by Inquisitor
Thank you!
You're welcome!
03/08/2017
Contributor: AmethystQueen AmethystQueen
BDSM is kinda home to me. I don't fit my activities into what most people consider vanilla/normal sex so BDSM and its community is the best fit. I have found the kinks and community to be a very comfortable fit for what I'm into. When I look back, I've always been kinky and BDSm is how we identify kinky people.

Kinky hair, kinky lifestyle rings true for me
07/28/2017