The New Intimacy

Choking......would you do it?

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Contributor: Nirelan Nirelan
My man wants to choke me while we have sex.....not actually hurt me but he wants that rush that it's possible I guess. I don't understand this at all and I quite frankly am not up for it or interested at all and VERY uncomfortable that he even wants to do this to me......it scares me actually LOL.

So my question is, would you do something that makes you uncomfortable for the sake of your partner or just say no?
Answers (public voting - your screen name will appear in the results):
I'd do it for sure!
Ansley , Beck , LusciousLollypop , UnknownGirl , hall5885 , RavenWings , Princess-Kayla ♥ , SMichelle , padmeamidala , AnnMorette , notjustinbieber , Airen Wolf , Poophammer , lustylusty , sweetpea12 , Missmarc , SubmissiveFeminist , xGOLDx , Jake'n'bake , puddi
20  (25%)
I'd try it at least....
USJT130119200518 , clix69 , plaidvulva , panda555 , WhoopieDoo , Taylor , pootpootpoot , kittenfacery , Dixiemomma , little miss kinky , LavenderSkies , Nikolis , VelvetDragon , blackadeezee , pinkpottergirl , TameTemptress , xxxdiannaooo , MidnightStorm , finnimbrun , PropertyOfPotter , chantalgiardina , L&P3040 , JackRaiden , Envoutes , KinkyKatiya
25  (32%)
Hell no! Not comfy with it, not happening.....
ejrbrndps , Kitten has left the site , Ice1 , BG529 , TdotY , Arch600 , Bignuf , LovesAPoet , MissCandyland , wetone123 , Geogeo , darthkitt3n , ghalik , PeaceToTheMiddleEast , PassionateLover2 , lacybutton , Terri69 , Allstars316 , Hallmar82 , Undead , Liz2 , Ciao. , M.O.'s Girl , powerandintent , noname3 , Rossie , Love Obsessed , mpfm , LoveBug721 , gloomybear , Narr , shcoo , theavocadopit , redstars
34  (43%)
Total votes: 79
Poll is closed
05/05/2012
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Contributor: ejrbrndps ejrbrndps
thats a little crazy
05/05/2012
Contributor: Kitten has left the site Kitten has left the site
that's a little freaky to me. it's actually known to be a fetish, choking until the point of passing out. i never do it.
05/05/2012
Contributor: clix69 clix69
I remember being choked before. Technically its not even really choking, i mean, you feel it and you don't. If you ever do happen to changed your mind, just come up with a safety word or action if it becomes too much, kind of like tapping out.
05/05/2012
Contributor: plaidvulva plaidvulva
I'd try something before full out rejecting it. But, everyone has limits. If it's something you really don't want to do, just say so and don't do it.
05/05/2012
Contributor: panda555 panda555
Just have to be careful and all is well
05/05/2012
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
Just start out slow and as someone else mentioned, work out a signal. Hubby knows that when I grab his wrist and squeeze he needs to let go.
05/05/2012
Contributor: Beck Beck
I love when my hubby does this actually. However if you are uncomfortable then don't force yourself to do something because he wants you to. Do what you feel comfortable. Be sure you TRUST your partner before doing this. If you are on the edge about it and he doesn't listen to your safety word, then you won't ever want to do it again.
05/05/2012
Contributor: WhoopieDoo WhoopieDoo
I could only do this with someone I omega trust big time.
05/05/2012
Contributor: Taylor Taylor
Definitely don't do something you're uncomfortable with, but if you do want to try it maybe have him just place a hand on your throat without any pressure until you get used to it and definitely have a signal in case you don't like it.

I love getting some light choking from my Dom, not enough to where I pass out or anything, but a firm hand on my neck is fun to me. He knows if I tap his arm though to let go. It's no fun if someone gets hurt after all.
05/05/2012
Contributor: Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by Nirelan
My man wants to choke me while we have sex.....not actually hurt me but he wants that rush that it's possible I guess. I don't understand this at all and I quite frankly am not up for it or interested at all and VERY uncomfortable that he ... more
I am not into anything that hurts, or could be harmful to my body. This fits both NO, NO concepts. You shouldn't EVER do anything you don't want to, and if he cares about you, he wouldn't insist...especially something that scares you.
05/05/2012
Contributor: Arch600 Arch600
Nobody should feel compelled to do something they're uncomfortable with for the sake of their partner. There is a significant difference between doing something new - experiencing the discomfort and thrill of the unknown - and doing something you've decided is not for you. I do not believe a partner should put his/her wants and desires above the well-being of their partner. That is not love in my book.

We each have a conversation with ourselves, wondering if our apprehension is because we aren't being open minded about something, or if it is truly outside of our bounds. If you decide to try something to learn whether you want to explore that avenue, that is one thing. If there is no question in your mind and your choice is made, that is something else entirely.

Communication is key. Tell your partner how you feel - even if you aren't sure how you feel. Discuss your apprehension and don't feel obligated to cross your own personal boundaries - unless you want to.
05/05/2012
Contributor: LovesAPoet LovesAPoet
I've been choked by someone trying to hurt me before so I don't think I could ever be ok with this in the bedroom. I get a little scared when my partner even touches my neck.
05/05/2012
Contributor: Nirelan Nirelan
Thanks guys! I don't think I'll try this after all, I really am REALLY uncomfortable with it, I just wish I could try it for him....
05/05/2012
Contributor: LusciousLollypop LusciousLollypop
I love being choked. It gets me all hot and bothered.
05/05/2012
Contributor: ValerieRayne ValerieRayne
Quote:
Originally posted by Taylor
Definitely don't do something you're uncomfortable with, but if you do want to try it maybe have him just place a hand on your throat without any pressure until you get used to it and definitely have a signal in case you don't like ... more
I agree with you completely here!

If you're not comfortable with the idea of choking, just a hand on the throat can often satisfy both partners. It's a wonderful compromise.

In my relationship, I'm the one with the interest in choking and he's the one afraid of potentially hurting me. This is also a guy who won't call me dirty names during sex (no matter how much I beg), because he thinks it's disrespectful... But I have compromised with the hand on the throat and so far it is doing me wonderfully!!
05/05/2012
Contributor: bayosgirl bayosgirl
I actually LIKE being choked, but my husband won't do it. I'm lucky if I can get a hand on the throat. :-/ But if I were uncomfortable with it or any sexual act, I simply wouldn't do it. Sex is meant to be fun and pleasurable, not obligatory. Just tell him you're not interested and he should respect that.
05/06/2012
Contributor: UnknownGirl UnknownGirl
We both like to be choked.
05/06/2012
Contributor: MissCandyland MissCandyland
Not comfortable with that.
05/06/2012
Contributor: Geogeo Geogeo
I enjoy choking men during sex. But I'd have to really like the guy for me to do something that I'm not comfortable with.
05/06/2012
Contributor: hall5885 hall5885
If you're not comfortable with it then I would say you shouldn't do it. But if you do decide to do it a safe word or signal should be decided upon before you do it. I myself like being choked but then again he doesn't tighten his hands or arm when doing it either so it really doesn't restricts my breathing. If it restricted my breathing then I wouldn't be comfortable with it at all.
05/06/2012
Contributor: RavenWings RavenWings
It depends on how its done. I have been choked, but not with two hands blazing on me. It was more of a "completely enveloped" thing with his arm across me. It was intense but pleasurable.
05/06/2012
Contributor: Princess-Kayla ♥ Princess-Kayla ♥
I enjoy my husband choking me during sex.
05/06/2012
Contributor: PeaceToTheMiddleEast PeaceToTheMiddleEast
NO way in hell.
05/06/2012
Contributor: PassionateLover2 PassionateLover2
Quote:
Originally posted by PeaceToTheMiddleEast
NO way in hell.
I agree. I think it goes beyond just tying someone up to the bed posts!
05/06/2012
Contributor: Deeder Deeder
It isn't something we do on a regular basis, but once every now and then my husband will lightly choke me. It's more of a pressure than actual squeezing/cutting off my air supply, and (so far, at least) every time he's done it I've been on top, so I can pull away if need be. I guess he seems to like it, but truthfully I'm a bit indifferent towards it.
05/06/2012
Contributor: Dixiemomma Dixiemomma
well you'd definitly have to trust him and it doesnt sound lik eyou do since it scares you .... i would allow it if my Mister wanted to but i trust him not to harm me

i dated a guy in the past that also liked to do the hand on the throat thing, he never really "choked" me but he liked to have his hand around my throat as if letting me know how easily he could

if you trust him not to harm you then go for it or suggest just hand to the throat not actually squeezing ... if you decide to let him choke you be sure to study the affects and pressure points online prior to doing it (make sure he looks at all this too) so you know what is "safe" and avoid accidents
05/06/2012
Contributor: Melan!e Melan!e
Quote:
Originally posted by Beck
I love when my hubby does this actually. However if you are uncomfortable then don't force yourself to do something because he wants you to. Do what you feel comfortable. Be sure you TRUST your partner before doing this. If you are on the edge ... more
My partner actually did this to me once without warning. He hasn't done it since and I never mentioned it. I'm curious now to find out if that's something he's interested in.

If we had a safe-action worked out, I'd consider letting him do it. But I'd rather discuss things and not have him spring it on me like he did years ago.

If you are truly not ok with this then just don't do it.
05/06/2012
Contributor: Terri69 Terri69
NO WAY!
05/07/2012
Contributor: SMichelle SMichelle
I enjoy a little bit of choking, but I could only ever do it with someone that I really trust.
05/07/2012