How to ask?

The New Intimacy

How to ask?

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Contributor: VanillaCupcake VanillaCupcake
VanillaCupcake
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VanillaCupcake
I was wondering how people new to BDSM go about asking a partner who is also inexperienced in it to take it farther?
I enjoy being submissive, and could most likely fall easily into the lifestyle, and my boyfriend is mildly dominant in bed, but its taken a year to even get him to try rope bondage with me (which he did enjoy)
How do I get him to open up more to it without pressuring him?
04/05/2011
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Contributor: UnknownGirl UnknownGirl
Just have an open and honest discussion about it. Don't dance around the issue. Be upfront about it.
04/05/2011
Contributor: PiratePrincess PiratePrincess
Talk about it at a time when you are both able to discuss the matter fully. Say what you want to say and put it out there and be prepared to talk about the matter in depth openly.
04/05/2011
Contributor: VanillaCupcake VanillaCupcake
Quote:
Originally posted by PiratePrincess
Talk about it at a time when you are both able to discuss the matter fully. Say what you want to say and put it out there and be prepared to talk about the matter in depth openly.
He just seems so uncomfortable whenever I bring it up, until he tries it and he is okay then, its just like pulling teeth! lol
04/05/2011
Contributor: Lucidity Lucidity
Tell him you want to try this with him because it turns you on and you think it will turn him on too. Tell him you can take it slow, but you want to try. The worst that can happen is that he doesn't like it. Open, honest conversation is key.
04/05/2011
Contributor: VanillaCupcake VanillaCupcake
Quote:
Originally posted by Lucidity
Tell him you want to try this with him because it turns you on and you think it will turn him on too. Tell him you can take it slow, but you want to try. The worst that can happen is that he doesn't like it. Open, honest conversation is key. ... more
Thank you, thats very helpful actually, I will try again!
04/07/2011
Contributor: cobiffle cobiffle
I would say the best thing to do is just talk to them about it and start off very slowly.
04/08/2011
Contributor: RosesThorns RosesThorns
One of the ways I suggest new things is "You know what would be hot?" *shrugs* Works for me... may not work for him, but as always communication is key.
04/26/2011