The New Intimacy

Does anyone engage in anal sex only to please their partner, but would never do it for any other reason?

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Contributor: Bignuf Bignuf
Is there anyone here who does participate in anal play, without really getting any pleasure out of it, but does so JUST for their partner? If you left this relationship, and went on to another lover, would you introduce them to anal play with you, or would you never mention it and try to forget you ever went "there"?

I ask, since someone new at work was talking about that being HER story from her last marriage!!!!! I don't know her well enough to talk to her about what a pleasure it can be. I was surprised SHE was so open about her life with her Ex. She has only been working with us about six weeks...but then again, we are an OPEN group!!!

Anyone else in this boat?
09/13/2012
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Contributor: GingerAnn GingerAnn
Engaging topic analysis of Anal Sex:

What was the reason to start anal sex?
Im wondering whats the main reason for someone to begin with anal sex? For me it's not that common I guess: Im a real ass-man and like to watch porn.

Hemorrhoids
This is kind of nasty, but I always have the weirdest questions. How would someone deal with hemorrhoids during anal sex? It would almost GUARANTEE to

Anal Lubricants
Do you think that the anal lubricants make any more of a difference than the other lubes not specified for anal sex?

Which kind do you like
I have had anal sex but don't have any toys yet, what would be good to get. Beads, balls, plugs. I am just not sure.

Anyone ever had a "vagal" reaction during anal sex?
We do anal play all the time, but I never had this happen before, till last night. We got home late after our usual Friday night dinner with friends,
09/13/2012
Contributor: Rossie Rossie
I'm the one who initiated it. I only ask for anal sex when I'm feeling kinky, my husband doesn't really care for anal sex, he prefers PIV sex much, much more.
09/13/2012
Contributor: CuteDee CuteDee
I like anal sex and enjoy it alot! Ive dated a few guys who werent into to and that ended pretty quickly. I really wouldnt discuss my sex life at work... That is kind of odd.
09/13/2012
Contributor: RedKyuubi RedKyuubi
Nope. I like it
09/13/2012
Contributor: Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
Well after 23 years of trying - I can finally say that she did it for me! We got this point with gradually showing her that anal play is rewarding - even if it's just in a contributory way - I mean enhancing the strength or her orgasm. My expectation from her progress with other new things like our myriad of toys - she will learn to enjoy it - therefore not doing it just for me. It's a process!
09/14/2012
Contributor: bunny love bunny love
Oh god, that sounds awful. I can't imagine having butt sex just because my partner wanted to. That just sounds like a recipe for disaster; at least for me it would be.

I knew I would be into butt play, but I didn't start having it with a partner until I felt comfortable.
09/14/2012
Contributor: Khanner Khanner
A really common question I see on women's sex health forums is "My partner wants to have anal but it hurts and I don't like it, how do I stop it from hurting?" or something to that extent. Usually they ask how to stop it from hurting, and not how to define their boundaries or say no. I'd say it's incredibly common. From what I know about anal, engaging in it for reasons other than the bottom's pleasure is not a good idea at all.
09/14/2012
Contributor: K101 K101
Quote:
Originally posted by Bignuf
Is there anyone here who does participate in anal play, without really getting any pleasure out of it, but does so JUST for their partner? If you left this relationship, and went on to another lover, would you introduce them to anal play with you, ... more
Sorry, but there's no way I'd subject myself to something like that just for someone else's pleasure, whether I love them or not. Thankfully, my partner would never ask that of me, knowing that I'd find it terribly painful. He has no interest in anal sex, thank God. We've never actually penetrated my booty, but done enough for me to know it's something I will not find pleasurable. I've asked him what he thinks about anal and everything. He makes it very clear that he's happy enough with our PIV sex and has no interest in putting his penis in my beehiney. LOL. I've had an EX who swore he'd "find a way to butt F me" That's not very nice to try and force it on someone, so I find it a lot easier to say "hell no I will not" these days. Lol.

If it weren't something I felt SOOO uncomfortable about, of course I'd do it for his pleasure if he really wanted, but I'm not putting myself and my body in danger and in pain for someone's pleasure.
09/14/2012
Contributor: MJ7 MJ7
Sex is a mutual thing.If one person isn't into it, I don't see the point. I personally enjoy anal, but only when I'm in the right mood for it, and if my partner is in the mood and I'm not, we DON'T do it.
09/15/2012
Contributor: PropertyOfPotter PropertyOfPotter
That's how things are here. I do it for him because he enjoys it, but I get little to no pleasure from it. I wouldn't introduce it into a new relationship if we were to break up, if the other person mentioned it I would consider but it would depend on a lot of things.
09/15/2012
Contributor: SavingMyself SavingMyself
I originally agreed to it because he wanted it, now that I've tried it, I enjoy it.
09/15/2012
Contributor: PeaceToTheMiddleEast PeaceToTheMiddleEast
I would never do that. I have tried it and don't like it. And my current partner knows up front that I would not do it and is fine with that.
09/15/2012