BF has trouble having sex

BF has trouble having sex

Knickersketchy Knickersketchy
Hi my boyfriend can't have sex and it's been an issue pretty much since we first started getting intimate 7 months ago.

A little back story, both of us have had some pretty tough stuff in our lives (both mid 20s). I'm juggling ptsd after an abusive relationship and he got out of a marriage that only last 4 months and his ex cheated on him and broke his heart.

We were pretty infatuated and hot for each other but once we first had sex I could feel this wall just shoot up on his side. After that sex was difficult. And sometimes if we did have sex I could get triggered from my past and cry and that would make him feel uncomfortable, even though he knew it had nothing to do with him.

He didn't realize this would be an issue until he met me. He's told me he has so much anxiety and gets too into his head. He often can't do things because they're "too intimate" and a lot of it seems to stem from his ex wife. I mean he hasn't gone down on me and won't do anything bdsm with me, just very plain. Which he is not plain and didn't act as much in the beginning until all this and then BAM.

I often feel like I've failed (though he's told me it's not my fault at all). I've tried everything from being sex, masturbating in front of him, trying to dirty talk or rub on him, discuss fantasies. I've even tried when he doesn't have work so he's less stressed. At this point it's been almost a month since we last did anything. Which I guess isn't too much as a surprise because at most we've had sex twice, MAYBE 3 times, a month. It's not frequent and I have a high sex drive.

And it hurts cuz my ex used to withhold sex from me as a method of control or punishment and would get angry when I discussed how sad it made me we wouldn't do it. And I know he's not my ex but then it brings up those feelings and memories.

So Idk if anyone has advice or anything.
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Total posts: 1
Unique posters: 1