The New Intimacy

Is one act more intimate/personal than the other?

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Contributor: UrNaughtyaAngel UrNaughtyaAngel
About how long to you wait to get more personal with link someone replied with something that reminded me of something and got me thinking again.

Years ago I used to listen to Howard Stern on the radio I Think it was him that said that a girl wan't really a virgin cause she had have engage in oral sex with several guys and to him that was more personal than having intercourse with several guys. In college a guy said the only person he will go down on will be his (future) wife.


I thought about it back then and thinking about it now. I think intercourse is more intimate/personal than oral sex being that your entire body is involve. Let take for example the missionary position: the bottom can have their arms ad legs wrapped around the top. The can be looking into each others eyes or kissing. I know the same can be said of the 69 position. But in intercourse you can at times be making love and for some making a baby. But you do have to be comfortable well at least most girls do have to feel very comfortable to be able to spread their legs and let someone give them oral.

Which one do you think is more intimate/personal and why?
Answers (private voting - your screen name will NOT appear in the results):
Oral Sex is more intimate
20
Intercourse is more intimate
43
I am not sure got to think about it some more
5
They are equally the same
16
Other
9
Total votes: 93 (84 voters)
Poll is closed
03/16/2011
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Contributor: Miss Naughty Kitty Miss Naughty Kitty
i find actual intercourse to be more intimate.
03/16/2011
Contributor: married with children married with children
I think they are both equal in intimaticy.
03/16/2011
Contributor: hive83 hive83
Quote:
Originally posted by UrNaughtyaAngel
About how long to you wait to get more personal with link someone replied with something that reminded me of something and got me thinking again.

Years ago I used to listen to Howard Stern on the radio I Think it was him that said that a ... more
I vote for intercourse.
03/16/2011
Contributor: lezergirl lezergirl
I vote for anything that makes both parties orgasm at the same time.
03/16/2011
Contributor: Bunnycups Bunnycups
I think intercourse is more intimate because you can hold and kiss the other person. You can also tell them how much you love them.
03/17/2011
Contributor: Epicurean Epicurean
I recognize it's different for everyone, but I've always upheld that oral sex is more intimate to me. I've slept with a lot of people, but I can count how many people I've let cum in my mouth on one hand.

To me intimacy is closely linked with vulnerability. Oral sex, particularly swallowing someone's cum, puts me in a much more vulnerable position than intercourse, and therefore I want it to be with someone I trust.
03/17/2011
Contributor: Happy Camper Happy Camper
I have technically slept with more men than I have given blowjobs. The number is small (2 vs. 1) but it's the thought behind why that makes me vote equally intimate. Emotionally, intercourse means way more to me than oral sex. But I feel that I take more risks with oral sex because as much of a condom safety nut as I am, I don't see the point in performing oral sex with condoms. I always give oral without a condom. That said, I feel better having sex with a condom than I do giving blowjobs without one. Both are rare for me, but if it's not a primary relationship, sex is a possibility and blowjobs are not. So in that sense, blowjobs might statistically be considered more intimate. But really my gut says intercourse.
03/17/2011
Contributor: Redboxbaby Redboxbaby
Intercourse is more intimate for us. We share our entire bodies and I allow him to enter mine completely. We are connected and one in that act. To us, that is as intimate as it can get.
03/17/2011
Contributor: PiratePrincess PiratePrincess
I find intercourse to be more intimate. I have a friend who believes that oral is less intimate than kissing, but I strongly disagree. While intercourse is more intimate, I find oral to be almost equal.
03/17/2011
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
Reminds me of the exchange between Veronica and Dante in Clerks. "You sucked 37 dicks?" (After he reveals he has only had sex with twelve girls before her and her number is like 2 or something.)
03/17/2011
Contributor: indiglo indiglo
I think my opinion on the matter has changed over the years. I used to think oral sex was more intimate - because you are seeing your partner's genitals up close and personal. You can see everything, smell, touch, taste everything. But now, I think intercourse is more intimate, because you're really giving yourself to the person - you can look into each other's eyes, kiss, say I love you, etc. In fact, the only times I've had those intense, emotional, "make me cry" orgasms were during intercourse. So these days, I vote intercourse as being more intimate!
03/17/2011
Contributor: Epicurean Epicurean
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
Reminds me of the exchange between Veronica and Dante in Clerks. "You sucked 37 dicks?" (After he reveals he has only had sex with twelve girls before her and her number is like 2 or something.)
hahaha - yes!
03/17/2011
Contributor: Joie de Cherresse Joie de Cherresse
I think intercourse is more intimate. That's when your two bodies become one.
03/17/2011
Contributor: Lavender*Moon Lavender*Moon
I think it really depends on the situation/person. Generally, I would say oral is more personal....however, I have given more impersonal bjs than I have had casual sex. But, again, I have screwed a guy just to screw him.
03/17/2011
Contributor: liilii080 liilii080
At the age and stage I am now, I believe they are equally intimate.
03/18/2011
Contributor: UrNaughtyaAngel UrNaughtyaAngel
Thank you all for voting and sharing your thoughts.
03/18/2011
Contributor: pinkzombie pinkzombie
Quote:
Originally posted by UrNaughtyaAngel
About how long to you wait to get more personal with link someone replied with something that reminded me of something and got me thinking again.

Years ago I used to listen to Howard Stern on the radio I Think it was him that said that a ... more
I would say regular sex is more intimate in the emotionally closeness, but oral is more personal as in personal space!
03/18/2011
Contributor: IrishLassie IrishLassie
I would say intercourse is more intimate, however oral sex is fairly close. Me personally, I would only go down on the guy I am with. My husband was my first sexual partner, and he has been the only guy I have gone down on. I know other people would think differently.
03/20/2011
Contributor: xoflxokcxo xoflxokcxo
Quote:
Originally posted by Lavender*Moon
I think it really depends on the situation/person. Generally, I would say oral is more personal....however, I have given more impersonal bjs than I have had casual sex. But, again, I have screwed a guy just to screw him.
I agree with you that it depends on the person/situation.

I can see why guys find oral more intimate. I think any time you take someone's fluids into your mouth (and swallow it) it's an intimate experience.
03/20/2011
Contributor: Cream in the Cupcake Cream in the Cupcake
I think Kissing is the most intimate.
03/21/2011
Contributor: hornypoet69 hornypoet69
I have never had intercourse, so it is difficult for me to comment on it. I don't get a lot of intimacy out of oral though it can be fun. Honestly if I'm naked and making out with a guy, that's about as intimate as it gets.
03/21/2011
Contributor: zeebot zeebot
I find the amounts of intimacy depends more on the person than the acts...
03/21/2011
Contributor: SexyStuff SexyStuff
I think intercourse because of the equal amounts of involvement.
03/22/2011
Contributor: BuckeyeGal04 BuckeyeGal04
I think that oral sex is most intimate because let's face it, it's VERY personal to give that to one another. I wouldn't do it to just anyone.
12/01/2011
Contributor: NarcissisticLust NarcissisticLust
Quote:
Originally posted by UrNaughtyaAngel
About how long to you wait to get more personal with link someone replied with something that reminded me of something and got me thinking again.

Years ago I used to listen to Howard Stern on the radio I Think it was him that said that a ... more
I think oral sex is more intimate. Oral is a head game and I can't give or receive oral unless i really care for the person.
12/01/2011
Contributor: switzerland switzerland
i think both are intimate, and both mean something. at least to me anyway.
12/01/2011
Contributor: ThoughtsAblaze ThoughtsAblaze
Quote:
Originally posted by BuckeyeGal04
I think that oral sex is most intimate because let's face it, it's VERY personal to give that to one another. I wouldn't do it to just anyone.
My boyfriend and I were just talking about this. For me, oral is more intimate for the above reason.

However, he finds intercourse extremely intimate and told me that he always has this moment of extreme vulnerability each time we have sex and feels closer after each act.
12/01/2011
Contributor: The Curious Couple The Curious Couple
I think intercourse is more intimate, but they are both very intimate for us.
12/01/2011
Contributor: ~LaUr3n~ ~LaUr3n~
Oral sex is more intimate.
12/01/2011