Why do people socially accept encounters with two women but condemn any other form of bisexuality or homosexuality?

Contributor: sexyintexas sexyintexas
I have never understood this. It is socially pretty acceptable for two women to have a bisexual encounter but people are chastized for lesbian and homosexual ones? Personally I dont think that it should be anyones buisness to judge anyone on who they want to have sex with. Just curious.
04/12/2011
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Contributor: horngry horngry
Because they objectify women.
04/13/2011
Contributor: buttmunch buttmunch
Quote:
Originally posted by horngry
Because they objectify women.
As a guy I hate to have to agree with this, many men do objectify women and since they've had most power in society over the ages their perversions are considered more socially acceptable than that of women, look at cheerleaders for example.
09/02/2011
Contributor: PassionCpl PassionCpl
Quote:
Originally posted by sexyintexas
I have never understood this. It is socially pretty acceptable for two women to have a bisexual encounter but people are chastized for lesbian and homosexual ones? Personally I dont think that it should be anyones buisness to judge anyone on who they ... more
Because most men are scared and admitting you like other guys is (to them) diminishing their masculinity
09/05/2011
Contributor: Kkay Kkay
I've encountered the attitude frequently that women with women is for the entertainment of men.
09/05/2011
Contributor: Love Perpetua Love Perpetua
Quote:
Originally posted by Kkay
I've encountered the attitude frequently that women with women is for the entertainment of men.
This.
09/27/2011
Contributor: Rawhide Rawhide
It's called conditional acceptance- "I'll accept you as long as what you're doing directly benefits me"

Generally it applies to young, conventionally pretty women making out. But try it with two men (no matter how young or pretty) or two women who don't fit conventional beauty standards and you'll get a very different result.
10/05/2011
Contributor: carenautilus carenautilus
Yeah, I'm gonna have to disagree a bit here. I think young, conventionally pretty, generally white women making out or having sex with each other are accepted in an incredibly patronizing and judgmental way.

But I'm a fat girl with opinions and a loud voice in a relationship with a short-haired genderfluid gentleman usually read as female. And we get yelled at in the streets, lectured, belittled, misunderstood, and the like. It's a sucky fact that queer people just aren't wanted or understood in many places.

To end this post on a positive note, I have many straight friends who are not just queer-friendly, but who actively try to make my partner and me feel safe and loved.
10/06/2011
Contributor: indiglo indiglo
Quote:
Originally posted by carenautilus
Yeah, I'm gonna have to disagree a bit here. I think young, conventionally pretty, generally white women making out or having sex with each other are accepted in an incredibly patronizing and judgmental way.

But I'm a fat girl with ... more
Very true! My man and I were just talking about this a couple days ago. I think you are exactly right - and I just can't wrap my mind around why anyone would care who anyone else is dating or having sex with.
10/06/2011
Contributor: hyacinthgirl hyacinthgirl
Some of it is the Victorian mindset of the beauty of a close relationship between two beautiful girls. They, of course, weren't reading anything sexual into it, but the whole schoolgirl lesbian trope was not really considered a bad or dirty thing. It was just more gentle, innocent beauty that uplifted everyone around, without any of that dirty, ugly sex stuff (because schoolgirl lesbians do not have sex - they hold each other close and sleep in the same bed and talk about their undying love, but they DO NOT HAVE SEX), and of course it wouldn't spoil them for their later husbands.

Then there's the porn star thing that if two hot girls are having sex with each other, it means they are twice as likely to include you, male audience, into their fun. Because really, how can they focus on each other when there's penis around? They were only having a same-sex encounter because they were so unbearably horny, and there was no penis around. Kind of the opposite of the schoolgirl lesbian, where the girls are supposed to be hyper-sexual and that's why they're together.
10/06/2011
Contributor: carenautilus carenautilus
Quote:
Originally posted by indiglo
Very true! My man and I were just talking about this a couple days ago. I think you are exactly right - and I just can't wrap my mind around why anyone would care who anyone else is dating or having sex with.
Neither can I. I'm guessing some of it is self-hate. On the bright side, you're one of the straight friends making positive headway in the world! Yay!
10/06/2011
Contributor: carenautilus carenautilus
Quote:
Originally posted by hyacinthgirl
Some of it is the Victorian mindset of the beauty of a close relationship between two beautiful girls. They, of course, weren't reading anything sexual into it, but the whole schoolgirl lesbian trope was not really considered a bad or dirty ... more
THIS. I could not have expressed it more clearly or accurately. I hadn't even thought to include the whole 'romantic friendship' trope we got from the Victorians. Very good point!
10/06/2011
Contributor: nori nori
I have no idea. Maybe because bi people are seen as just experimentors, while lesbian and gay are solidified attraction? I have no idea.
10/07/2011
Contributor: oldhippy oldhippy
I have to agree with most of the posts about the lesbian side being the young girls in schools having sex because there were no males around, so of course, it was innocent.
There is one other factor though that I feel needs to be looked at. It is the factor that most people fear what they don't understand. Lets face facts, most of us have been raised in the Puritan mindset that is very straight laced and very narrow minded when it comes to sex. If it is not male and female, then it is morally wrong. The Puritans refused to accept the fact that there were then and have always been people with different sexual persuasions, especially homosexual. It is an established fact that in general 1 in every 10 people in the world is homosexual in some fashion.
If you want to freak out a real homophobian, tell him that fact, then advise him that if he or she knows 9 straight people, they are it.
I know that it took me many years to get to the point of being open enough to be able to learn about and accept alternate life styles. This was a great thing for both my wife (who learned this first) and myself, when our oldest daughter came out to us that she was lesbian. This was something that we had suspected for a couple of years, but did not want to confront her about until she decided for herself.
Again, I feel that fear of the unknown is the major problem with why some things like young girls with young girls is acceptable, while other lifestyles are not.
10/07/2011
Contributor: hyacinthgirl hyacinthgirl
Well... one of the things in the Puritan mindset was that homosexuality was considered an upper class affectation. It was so much considered awful because it was men with men (women with women was ignored), but because it was mostly indulged in by only the higher echelons of society.
10/07/2011
Contributor: Kitka Kitka
Society as a whole sucks? I don't know, I think everyone should stay out of the private business of everyone else but that's not in our nature. We're curious and quite nosy beings.

Personally I think people should accept people for what/whoever they are and go about their day.
10/10/2011