Wondering why there isn't more discussion for pansexuals?

Wondering why there isn't more discussion for pansexuals?

mrs poop. mrs poop.
The term bi-sexual is gender binary (obvs) and doesn't really fit everyone Not everyone is only attracted to just cis-gendered folks... I'd love to heard from others who indentify as pan.
01/09/2012
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spiceboy spiceboy
I don't usually touch the issue since a lot of folks feel disrespected by criticisms of the term "bisexual". I agree, though, that it's pretty limiting and I never felt that it was appropriate for me; even before I had cause to question the gender binary I knew I wanted a broader term. "Pansexual" is still too specific (for me) in that it can be concretely defined. I prefer "queer" for the fluidity and ambiguity of its meaning. I don't think it's always necessary to spell out exactly who I am—or have the capacity to be—attracted to, so I prefer a label that is an implication rather than an explanation.

What kind of discussion are you looking for?
01/09/2012
mrs poop. mrs poop.
Quote:
Originally posted by spiceboy
I don't usually touch the issue since a lot of folks feel disrespected by criticisms of the term "bisexual". I agree, though, that it's pretty limiting and I never felt that it was appropriate for me; even before I had cause to ...
In what way do you find it too specific?
Though I understand what you mean, that identifying as "queer" allows you to imply, rather than specify.
01/10/2012
Rawhide Rawhide
Pansexual is still kinda the new kid on the identity block. Give it time, and it'll be right up there with all the other endlessly confusing strings of labels that we use to identify non-normative sexuality.

Personally when it comes to describing my orientation, I stick with queer. It's been around forever, it's been reclaimed from bigots (love that!), and the only thing it really says is: "I'm non-normative. I don't fuck or love the way I'm traditionally expected to." Anyone who wants to know specifics has to ask. And that suits me just fine.
01/10/2012
mrs poop. mrs poop.
I've spoken with many people recently about ID as queer, and I can understand why it's preferred for many.

Definately agree with appreciating something as a reclaimed word.
01/11/2012
PDXlady PDXlady
I agree with the other posters, I usually identify as queer. I don't think there is anything wrong with others identifying as bisexual but I think it's a bit to restricting for me because I personally am not strictly attracted to cis-gendered people.
02/09/2012
glassdoll glassdoll
I agree with what grrrl has said. I'm kind of switching to using the term queer for myself since neither my gender identity or sexual identity are how I present (as a heterosexual cis-female). I find that most people think that pansexualism is either really confusing or just a more complicated way of saying 'bisexual' so queer is just easier since it highlights the "I love differently than you do".
02/19/2012
highlifegirl highlifegirl
I identify as pansexual when I am not going through one of my asexual jaunts.

I believe more bi-identifying folks in gender-binary areas of the country would probably switch to identifying pan if they were educated further into the LGBT spectrum community. I identified as bisexual until I moved from my very rural hometown and had further insight into the topics.
03/20/2012
TheParrishism TheParrishism
I think pansexual is kind of being 'politically correct.' I think it is very specific as well. I think queer is a wider term for the same thing. I think pansexual is in reference of sexuality only and a lot of people I know feel that queer covers more of their identity.
03/22/2012
P'Gell P'Gell
I think there are a LOT of discussion about the issue on Eden. Look through people's profiles. About a bazillion people "identify as pansexual." It seems to be quite common here.

I had no idea "Bisexual" was disrespectful, all my friends who.... (what am I supposed to call them now?) have sex with more than one gender of people seem to use the term and don't have any problems with it. They use "queer" too.

The labeling is confusing sometimes. You are who you are, not who you are attracted to, I think.
03/22/2012
sneako sneako
Quote:
Originally posted by mrs poop.
The term bi-sexual is gender binary (obvs) and doesn't really fit everyone Not everyone is only attracted to just cis-gendered folks... I'd love to heard from others who indentify as pan.
I identify as queer, but I guess I'm pan if you don't like that word.
03/23/2012
TheParrishism TheParrishism
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
I think there are a LOT of discussion about the issue on Eden. Look through people's profiles. About a bazillion people "identify as pansexual." It seems to be quite common here.

I had no idea "Bisexual" was ...
I don't find it disrespectful at all. I think people who do find it offensive are the nitpicking type.
03/24/2012
catsin catsin
I only use pansexual when I'm among people whom I know will understand what that means, otherwise I use queer. I feel that queer places me in a category full of rainbow flags and pride parades, which don't get me wrong are fun and enjoyable, but just aren't my niche.

Altogether, I'd much prefer to just say "I'm human". I make decisions based not on gender or sexual orientation but on whether or not I find I have a connection with someone. Sometimes it's the wrong decision. I've found gay men are occasionally attracted to me, but does that make them suddenly queer or suddenly bi?

In my mind, sexuality (like much of life) is like this quote by T.S. Eliot:
"Every experience is a paradox in that it means to be absolute, and yet is relative; in that it somehow always goes beyond itself and yet never escapes itself."
03/24/2012
WhoopieDoo WhoopieDoo
I generally use the term pansexual to describe myself since it's easy. I like to just think of myself as "sexual." My sexuality permeates throughout my life and I'm attracted to people in general, sometimes in context of their sex or gender and sometimes not. My identity changes, and that also affects who I'm attracted to and why at that point in time.
03/24/2012
queergaze queergaze
Quote:
Originally posted by TheParrishism
I don't find it disrespectful at all. I think people who do find it offensive are the nitpicking type.
Basically, the issue is that the term "bisexuality" refers to binary, and many non-binary folk feel invalidated by it. For some bi folks it means they're attracted to any sort of binary, for example the standard cismale/cisfemale, or femme/butch of any sex, etc. Personally I don't see the point in invoking binary at all, because people like what people like and if bisexual no longer means what most people think it means, what's the point in using it? I don't like to police how people self-identify, and if bisexual works for someone I won't tell them to knock it off. I just find it a clumsy word.

I ID'd as pansexual for a while, and while I don't think it no longer applies to me I am more comfortable with "queer" like many people posting in this thread. I just find it encompasses everything very nicely - genderqueer, sexually queer, and kinky.
03/25/2012
thisisadeletedaccount thisisadeletedaccount
I don't have any problem with people who use the word bisexual, it means different things to different people, but I definitely feel like pan is the truest descriptive term for me. I've seen a decent number of other pansexual folk here, though. That might be partially because I hang out on the transgender forum, too, where people have some pretty clear reasons to think about gender inclusivity.
07/01/2012
Pantransguy Pantransguy
Quote:
Originally posted by highlifegirl
I identify as pansexual when I am not going through one of my asexual jaunts.

I believe more bi-identifying folks in gender-binary areas of the country would probably switch to identifying pan if they were educated further into the LGBT ...
I think that really depends on generation as well as location. When I went to the Bi/Pan/Fluid institute at Creating Change we discussed the terms bisexual and pansexual and the possible differences a lot. We found that a lot of people who are above say 30 or 35 and who identify as bisexual define their identity the same way many pansexual people do. Basically, they are entirely open to dating people of all genders, and recognize the existence of more than 2 genders. But they fit that definition into the bisexual identity, which many of them have applied to themselves for years. I think after identifying one way for so long, it is easier and probably feels better to continue identifying that way. In my experience it's mainly younger people who identify as pansexual since it's a newer term/identity label. Typically we heard the term at some point during our adolescence or young adulthood, related to it, and decided to use it for ourselves. I know that's how it happened for me. I hadn't been identifying as bisexual very long at that point, so I didn't mind changing my label.

In general that session at Creating Change taught me that even though I identify specifically as pansexual, I fall into the Bi* community. Bi* is like Trans* in that it incorporates more identities than just bisexual. Bi* can include bisexual, pansexual, omnisexual, fluid, and other similar identities. So I can still identify with the "B" in "LGBT" even though my specific identity is pansexual.
07/09/2012
Total posts: 17
Unique posters: 14