Should I send a gift?

The New Intimacy

Should I send a gift?

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Contributor: K101 K101
I say no. There's no way I'd spend my time and money on a gift for someone who I ain't friends with and ain't going to their wedding. I really don't think they will see that as poor taste. If it were me, I certainly would not expect a gift. Just a nice CONGRATS! would be enough I'd think.
09/05/2011
Contributor: SexyStuff SexyStuff
It isn't necessary, but would be nice, even something inexpensive. My parents friends sent us a lot of wedding gifts, it is more because you know the mother.
02/29/2012
Contributor: samanthalynn samanthalynn
Quote:
Originally posted by phunkyphreak
A co worker invited me to her daughter's wedding and I already declined the invitation I am going out of town. Do I still send a gift or is it in poor taste not to. I don't really know the daughter and met her fiance briefly. What do you think?
i say no
02/29/2012
Contributor: Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
(EF Review Program Mentor)
Quote:
Originally posted by Kayla
According to the social etiquette posts I just researched, it says that you don't have to, but if you know the parents of the daughter well, you may consider sending a gift. A gift in the $25 - $50 price range would be appropriate.
~Nods If you are really close with the Mother of the bride than a small notion or something off their bridal registry would be appropriate along with a card sending best wishes and what not. If you don't know the Mother or Bride well then a simple card to acknowledge that you recieved an invitation would be appropriate.
02/29/2012
Contributor: curious kitten curious kitten
How close to the worker are you, just a new acquaintence, worked together for 10 to 20 years, or somebody you socialize with outside the office occasionally. People don't invite strangers to their children's weddings.
02/29/2012
Contributor: Undead Undead
Quote:
Originally posted by phunkyphreak
A co worker invited me to her daughter's wedding and I already declined the invitation I am going out of town. Do I still send a gift or is it in poor taste not to. I don't really know the daughter and met her fiance briefly. What do you think?
No. you don't have to send one
03/01/2012
Contributor: DiamondKoala DiamondKoala
Maybe just send a card to let them know you actually considered their event important enough to remember at some point. It's just a nice formality.
03/01/2012
Contributor: Zombirella Zombirella
Quote:
Originally posted by phunkyphreak
A co worker invited me to her daughter's wedding and I already declined the invitation I am going out of town. Do I still send a gift or is it in poor taste not to. I don't really know the daughter and met her fiance briefly. What do you think?
I wouldn't unless I was good friends with the person
03/01/2012
Contributor: BlooJay BlooJay
Probably wouldn't
03/01/2012
Contributor: MamaDivine MamaDivine
Quote:
Originally posted by phunkyphreak
A co worker invited me to her daughter's wedding and I already declined the invitation I am going out of town. Do I still send a gift or is it in poor taste not to. I don't really know the daughter and met her fiance briefly. What do you think?
You really don't know her, I wouldn't. If it were a friend or family member than yes. But I wouldn't think that you're obligated to
03/13/2012
Contributor: MissCandyland MissCandyland
No.
03/14/2012
Contributor: Beck Beck
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
What is your relationship like with your co worker? If you do not send a small acknowledgement gift will it create problems or rumors in the workplace? I would send a nice card and a simple but inexpensive candle set. Use your points, get a nice ... more
This is s great idea!
03/14/2012
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
Quote:
Originally posted by phunkyphreak
Good Idea!!! I like my co worker, Deb but I do not relly know her children. My other co worker Molls kids got married and did not invite me which was fine. I also told Deb not to invite me I was going to be out of town. I kinda feel that I do not ... more
I'd say if you asked her NOT to invite you, and she did, knowing you'd be out of town, it was one of those "O, we get a free gift and don't have to buy her and her partner drinks or dinner!" Sadly many many people get mercenary when it comes to weddings, thinking people "owe" them gifts.

Social protocol says that if you don't go to the wedding and the bride and groom are not close friends or relatives you are not obligated to send a gift.

People see cards with nothing in them as "WTF" a lot of time. They get a card and think there will be a check in there, and then there isn't. I wouldn't send a card. Simply tell your co-worker to enjoy the wedding and to wish her daughter and her fiancee good luck. Then mail back the RSVP with your regrets.

You owe her nothing other than that.
03/14/2012