None of my grudges are hidden, lol! Actually, I don't really have grudges, so much as a "total lack of interest and caring for those I have dismissed as not worthwhile" --that would be more like it.
If I happen to hear someone I didn't like is doing well, however, I do think it's a shame they aren't as miserable as they have made others over the years. But I really think they get their just deserts at some point, in some way, so I don't dwell on it beyond a passing thought. I think, "Gee, that's just too bad; the jerk deserves worse." And then I go on with my day.
I don't think people's basic personalities change all that much (barring mental or serious physical illness). But I was/am a good judge of character and if I pegged someone as really terrible, then there was overwhelming evidence of it, not just regular school drama. I think those who want to re-write the past because they are embarrassed about their behavior, tend to be the ones who embrace this "people change" mantra. Sure, some
people change, but I think it's usually after heavy shit, like experiencing terrible violence or war, significant illness, death, extreme hardship, or abuse, drug dependency and recovery...that kind of stuff (for example, but by no means all inclusive).
I basically would have to see this metamorphosis to believe it. I just haven't seen ANY evidence of anyone I know having changed their core personality. Sure, if they think it behooves them now, they might be nice to the person they used to bully, but I don't think the nature that caused them to be hateful is gone. I think it's there and manifests itself in other ways.
Yeah, I'm not a trusting person, go figure; I was harassed all through school, despite doing nothing to cause it. I had lots of false rumors and passive aggressive anger directed at me in high school for no reason that I could tell (it turns out jealousy makes people mean and tell lies about those they envy or feel threatened by, who knew? /sarcasm) At least I can truthfully say that I have never been mean to anybody and I was nice to everyone in school, despite any grief that might have brought me. I have always treated people as I would like to be treated and my actions are all I can worry about or control. So, those others? They could "fall off a cliff for all I care"
I realize my attitude might surprise some people, but there you have it.
@*Ashley*, this was a great question/poll topic!