The Mystery of the Disapearing Lube!

Contributor: Viktor Vysheslav Malkin Viktor Vysheslav Malkin
The Mystery of the Disappearing Lube! A tale of of worry and woe, mysteries and revelations, and a lot of fury. Sit back and enjoy this read.

It was 6:30 pm, after a wonderful and passionate evening with his girlfriend, he bid her farewell. Not knowing what horror he had done, he slipped into the as the headlights faded down the driveway. Fifteen minutes and he was ready to step into the cold air outside the warm shower. Something hit him like a a wild premonition. "What had I done with the lube?". Stumbling through the house, falling hard onto the slipper floor, minutes later he would awake. A distant maniacal laughing burned into his head!

The young man stumbled throughout the house, destroying the bathing room in search for his lost lubricant! He could hear the voice taunting him "You will not find me in time, they will be back soon and THEY will find it!". He had but an hour before his roommates would be home, and they would ridicule and embarrass the man. He searched long and hard, the laughter and taunts become louder and louder as the time approached.

"Fuck it, let them find it, I am a smooth player I can handle it!" the man taunted back, as the clock it five til' eight!. "Keep telling yourself that!" said the maniacal mystery pest as it chocked out a laugh! "Three minutes to go, how you feeling Vik?!"... "Two minutes...". "One minute!" The voice kept taunting.

A sound from the drive way came, two heavy doors closing! "They're here!" said the pest as he chocked out an even more maniacal laugh!

"Damn it..."

As the young man walked into the bath room and looked into the mirror, the footsteps were getting louder and louder! He looked down, and heard the voice shout "Damn it!" and a he heard a cry of pain as he lifted the bottle of lub from the sink! "You win this time boy!" said the pest as to get one last taunt in!"

The man smiled, and hide the lube in its proper hiding place!

The end.
______________________ ______________________ __________


What you just read was based on an event that took place earlier today, it was based on yours truly, just with a little bit of added fictionalism.

You see I lost my lube, looked everywhere, looked at the sink, looked around the sink, tore up my room. I was starting to believe I had a poltergeist! There were no sounds, no laughing, no maniacal pest. However, I looked everywhere, I had given up twice in my search only to take up the search again! And right as I heard the footsteps I found it near the sink! Where I could have sworn I looked!

I am constantly forgetting stuff... Last time I reviewed a mastubator, I forgot the cornstarch near the sink. Had to answer why that was there, "Oh I heard it helps take super glue off your hands", no that is not true to my knowledge but It worked!

Anyone else have this problem, even if its not a big deal if you leave out your stuff.

I could only imagine a guest finding it lol!
02/03/2010
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Contributor: Raven Raven
Funny story, Viktor.

I think a lot of us have had that happen, and on more than one occasion. Several times I have searched and searched for something and had no luck in finding it, only to have it turn up later in the exact location I had previously searched.

There have been times when either my husband or I will wonder out loud if maybe we have a "spook in the house" because of the strangeness of the situation.

And with the information overload we have today, I think overlooking or forgetting things is not all that uncommon.
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