Has your partner been the first one to say "I love you" and you replied the same and if so did you really mean it or started saying it just because they were? What went through your mind in that moment and did it feel less genuine saying it afterwards?
Ever said "I love you" because someone else did first and did you mean it
12/26/2010
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I know I'd never say 'I love you' to anyone first...I'm a fairly emotive person and it makes me vulnerable in case the other person doesn't feel the same way. So, I always wait for them and then after I know how they feel, it's easier for me to assess whether I do love them or can allow myself to love them.
Lately though I don't know what's been going on...I'm in a sort of undefined thing and he has said "I loooove you" or "but I wuv you" on a few separate occasions--and even though the situation has always been non-serious and he hasn't said "I love you" straight out, I'm starting to panic because I make every effort to not say anything even remotely similar. So each time he's said it, I've laughed it off and changed the subject -- and I'd only respond positively if he said it for real.
Lately though I don't know what's been going on...I'm in a sort of undefined thing and he has said "I loooove you" or "but I wuv you" on a few separate occasions--and even though the situation has always been non-serious and he hasn't said "I love you" straight out, I'm starting to panic because I make every effort to not say anything even remotely similar. So each time he's said it, I've laughed it off and changed the subject -- and I'd only respond positively if he said it for real.
12/26/2010
I have a major saying "I love you" phobia. There's been a couple of relationships where I've had major fights because I wasn't comfortable saying it at the time and one guy even broke up with me.
12/26/2010
If a person says "I love you" and I do not feel that I love them, I will not say it to them. That's just as bad as lying.
12/26/2010
I was always the first to say it. And I had no idea what it really meant, so I don't trust myself to know what's really going on. I've learned that fear (ex-husband) and gratitude (Mulder) are NOT love. Love itself ... don't know yet.
12/26/2010
They said it first and I said yes back and didn't mean it. Granted it was awkward and I was trying to get out of the situation. I was also 17. I haven't said I love you to a partner since. I haven't been in a lot of long term relationships. They don't appear to work for me.
12/26/2010
When I was younger, I know I said it back even though I didn't mean it. I'd never do that now.
12/26/2010
No. I would never do that. That's actually pretty awful.
12/26/2010
Quote:
I have to say none of the choices exactly fits. Sigel did say that he loved me first but it was YEARS before I knew that I was saying it back because it was true. I have major trust issues and it was much worse when I was younger.
Originally posted by
moonch1ld
Has your partner been the first one to say "I love you" and you replied the same and if so did you really mean it or started saying it just because they were? What went through your mind in that moment and did it feel less genuine saying it
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more
Has your partner been the first one to say "I love you" and you replied the same and if so did you really mean it or started saying it just because they were? What went through your mind in that moment and did it feel less genuine saying it afterwards?
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Now with Arch the first time I told him I loved him I was in tears because I was terrified that he didn't feel the same and would crush me. He still thinks I am insane for believing that he would ever hurt me. I was the first to say the "L" word....No Sigel not lesbian....but he had been emoting it for weeks.
12/27/2010
In past relationships if I didn't love someone, I wouldn't say that I did just to 'ditto' their feelings. However when I met my wife to be, the feelings were really mutual - so responding in kind was honest.
12/27/2010
It was basically the same time for us, we both knew that we were in love
12/27/2010
I have and didnt mean it at all.
12/29/2010
I was waiting for him to say it. I accidentally let it slip once and so did he, so we negated those. I knew I loved him, and he knew he loved me. He was just nervous I wasn't going to say it back. Saying the L word is not something he takes lightly.
12/29/2010
My ex said it withen the first week. I just stared at him and went ok.
12/29/2010
In my current relationship, I confessed my feelings first but he was the first to say I love you. If that makes any sense o_o
01/01/2011
My wife said it to me accidentally after us being with her family all weekend. I didn't say it back at the time because it took me so off guard. But I did tell her the next weekend, and I did mean it. Our relationship progressed really quickly.
01/01/2011
I have said it thinking it would get me a little more action. It didn't.
09/04/2011
My boyfriend said it first. And when I said it back, I meant it. I had actually been hoping he would say it.
09/06/2011
He said it first i said it back i was soooo happy he said it first because i wanted to tell him from a long time ago but i was scared i was moving too fast.
09/13/2011
I don't say I love you to anyone over the age of 4. I say, "you too."
09/13/2011
Oh and with my "you too" most of the time its just to fill the awkward silence and to avoid hurting someones feelings. Rarely do I mean it.
09/14/2011
Quote:
When I was younger, I know that I have said I love you and not meant it. As I have matured I tend to ignore it. Don't get me wrong I love my wife and would be lost without her. She told me she Loved me for 6+ months before I recipicated.
Originally posted by
moonch1ld
Has your partner been the first one to say "I love you" and you replied the same and if so did you really mean it or started saying it just because they were? What went through your mind in that moment and did it feel less genuine saying it
...
more
Has your partner been the first one to say "I love you" and you replied the same and if so did you really mean it or started saying it just because they were? What went through your mind in that moment and did it feel less genuine saying it afterwards?
less
09/14/2011
I take those 3 words extremely seriously. Yes, I have had partners say it to me first, and I did not say it back because I didn't feel it at the time. The positive to that is when I say it, my partner knows that I mean it. My man said it many times in the beginning of our relationship without ever hearing me say it back. He says now it puzzled him at the time, but did not deter him. Now, of course, I say it all the time and mean it. He had to earn it though.
09/14/2011
Total posts: 23
Unique posters: 22