new to all this

Contributor: pchy pchy
hello everyone im new to this site and the whole idea of sex toys

been reading through the different discussions and topics and not sure if this is the right place to post my question to get advice.

ill be honest i have never had sex before and i want to start exploring my body and everything people talk about on my own before i do it with another person.

i would love to try out a sex toy to help in this but i am not sure which one is good for a beginner like me there are sooo many and it gets really confusing looking at all of them.

i do know i would like one that is water proof and doesnt make noise.
would be a plus if it was not expensive (being in collage money is tight)

any help or advice on this would be great and even some tips for exploring. im kinda a little intimidated and nervous not sure where or what to start with.
im sorry if this is not the right place for a post like this

thank you
02/24/2015
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Contributor: Inquisitor Inquisitor
Well, I'd like to first say Welcome! If you are looking for advise on a toy, this is the right place. EF seems to be a Sex Positive place and you should feel no shame in asking any sort of sex related question you want. I have found that you will get honest and truthful answers to your question here.

Sadly, I'm not qualified to offer advise on your situation. Be patient though, I know someone who is more qualified will answer your question Pchy.
02/24/2015
Contributor: pchy pchy
Quote:
Originally posted by Inquisitor
Well, I'd like to first say Welcome! If you are looking for advise on a toy, this is the right place. EF seems to be a Sex Positive place and you should feel no shame in asking any sort of sex related question you want. I have found that you will ... more
thank you very much for replying

its great that this is a safe and friendly forum to post and ask questions on all this

i never had that advantage growing up to learn about all this.

i lost my parents at a young age and was raised by my grandparents- who were very old school and religious when it came to the topic of sex and everything around it. hope its ok if i ask some things at times, this is all so new to me.

i feel kinda dumb asking questions that most know so much about. and its hard to find a reliable answer to alot of questions on the internet.
02/24/2015
Contributor: Vnessa Vnessa
Hello, Luv, and welcome! You will find this to be a very safe and comfortable place for questions or even random thoughts.

First, I know it can be rather awkward and uncomfortable discussing something that you may not have much knowledge in. You are not alone. That's why so many of us are here, helping, and guiding each other along our sexual journeys.

Now, for the fun stuff! For a beginner, I would look for a clitoral stimulator. I wouldn't try anything too 'invasive' since you haven't had sex before. I'm assuming you may want to keep your virginity in tact? You could try link . it's waterproof and priced reasonable.

glad to see you on the Forum!
02/24/2015
Contributor: christina sanchez christina sanchez
Quote:
Originally posted by pchy
hello everyone im new to this site and the whole idea of sex toys

been reading through the different discussions and topics and not sure if this is the right place to post my question to get advice.

ill be honest i have never had sex ... more
WELCOME PCHY!!!! my name is christina. 28/f married and mom of four children. it is nice meeting you. i would like to say congrats on college! i know how expensive that can get. so i def. commend you with going and wish you the best of luck! and yessss, def. you came to the right place. no shame in asking! we are all here for similar reasons.... safe, sexual, exploring! i would honestly say and this is just an opinion.... your a virgin, and first time right? well, first thing before i ever had sex i explored with simple masturbation. basic rubbing around the clitoris area. mainly yes pillow humping. nothing inserted. then when i actually lost my virginity, still if i wanted to have an orgasm it was with my hands. once again the clitoris. my very first toy was a vibrating dildo. yes! i jumped into it! now years later... i am more concerned with making sure the material is safe. and actually i just purchased for the first time a rabbit! i loveeee it! i would say.... your a virgin, first time toy.... maybe a clit toy. focusing on that area. depends on how you view the sexual belief. i honestly feel like having a toy will not give skills or make first time sex easier.... def. savor the moment for first time sex. i would say try to look for a clit toy, something that runs with batteries not a plug in charger, cause i know you said something quiet and discrete. and something not expensive...... maybe try going for the silicone butterfly or bunny ears clit toy..... i mean if material isnt a bother they do have like lipstick looking toys thats discrete. but yea... def. stick with a clit toy. im sorry, i hope that helps?? it was great talking to you. and good luck with school! take care pchy!
02/24/2015
Contributor: christina sanchez christina sanchez
Quote:
Originally posted by pchy
hello everyone im new to this site and the whole idea of sex toys

been reading through the different discussions and topics and not sure if this is the right place to post my question to get advice.

ill be honest i have never had sex ... more
link

link

heres some products on eden. you can def. try like a finger vibe too. there fairly cheap, waterproof, and quiet.
02/25/2015
Contributor: pchy pchy
hello vnessa and christina thank you very much for the reply and advise

i am glad i came across this site and forum it is very comforting and reasuring that this is a safe and honest place to get advice and help. i am glad everyone is so friendly on here.

yes i am a virgin and have never had any kind of sex or self touching/pleasuring at all. yes i still want to stay a virgin (till i get married) i would really like a "toy" that would help me explore the different areas and sensations and nothing to invasive or strong or inserted (at least for now)

yes a battery operated toy would be great honestly i dont want something that makes noise

christina thank your for the congrats on attending college and yea it is not cheap hope it is all worth it.
christina thank your for sharing and the ideas that helps alot and yes a clit toy sounds perfect to start out with

thanks for the links and product suggestions am going to check them out now
probably sounds weird but.. woohoo im excited now cant wait to find a product or two that will help me out on my journey
02/25/2015
Contributor: Inquisitor Inquisitor
You might find something on the sales side of this website that might suit your purpose. Good Luck! BTW, what's your Major? Have you decided on one yet?
02/25/2015
Contributor: pchy pchy
Quote:
Originally posted by Inquisitor
You might find something on the sales side of this website that might suit your purpose. Good Luck! BTW, what's your Major? Have you decided on one yet?
hello inquisitor and thanks
yes i am looking at the sale items and everything on this site lots and lots of interesting items i would love to try when i am more comfortable and advanced

yes i am studying small business management and advertising for my major
02/25/2015
Contributor: pchy pchy
question,

i keep seeing in the forums and reviews and products kegel balls. they sound like they would be helpful and interesting

would they be good for me to invest in and try out? if so which one would be good for a beginner? or should i wait were i am a beginner to all this?

any opinions on this or advice?

thanks
02/25/2015
Contributor: christina sanchez christina sanchez
Quote:
Originally posted by pchy
question,

i keep seeing in the forums and reviews and products kegel balls. they sound like they would be helpful and interesting

would they be good for me to invest in and try out? if so which one would be good for a beginner? or ... more
awww, your quite welcome pchy! yeah, it's fine, not weird at all! dont ever feel weird! hey i got a vagina, you got a vagina.... its an awesome thing. i think that your going about a safe and alternative way to enjoy a good old fashion orgasm. this is not the dark ages anymore. its better than going out and exploring with actual people and doing something unsure of, vs hey im exploring myself and chatting with people who hopefully we can all help just by being social and sharing our sexual thoughts. we are all on here, we all have different and unique pleasures we try. for instance like the kegel balls, never did that. or like the bondage, role play not fully did i do that. so rock on mama! i can say for myself, i never tried kegel balls! yupp, never tried them yet. same here, i heard there really suppose to be good for muscles in that region and like make it more tighter and stronger. i will be honest i know if thats the case i would be a perfect candidate because of having four kids..... but I AM CHICKEN! oh my stars, i am scared! because i dont know if its safe for women with multiple cesarean sections... would it like rip my insides apart?? oh boy and how they sit in there.... im just scared. please dont let my negative thoughts push you away from trying kegel balls, its just im very scared. because even now, im still very sensitive when being penetrated. its like a uncomfortable push, or pressure. if you do try the kegel exercise i know this sounds really weird but would you write back and tell how it was?? like if it was painful but def. notice results of strengthening... or like if it didnt work or if different kegel balls were better than another... its def. great talking to you again! take care and have a wondeful night!!!!
02/25/2015
Contributor: pchy pchy
Quote:
Originally posted by christina sanchez
awww, your quite welcome pchy! yeah, it's fine, not weird at all! dont ever feel weird! hey i got a vagina, you got a vagina.... its an awesome thing. i think that your going about a safe and alternative way to enjoy a good old fashion orgasm. ... more
thanks for the reply and advice its great to have this forum and people just like me with the same questions and concerns.

im feeling much better now chatting on here and asking foe advice thank you.

i do really want to try kegel balls but my concern is: where i am still a virgin-never touched or explored my parts or even used a tampon, would it be safe to use kegel balls? do i even need them right now-i see alot of reviews say they help with strengthening and bladder control and all that. and if i would benefit from them which one is best for a beginner like me.

its really great chatting with you also christina thanks you also take care and have a wonderful night also

cant wait to get and try my first vibrator i am def. going with a clit stimulator nothing to strong thinking something with multi-speed to try different things out wooohooo
02/25/2015
Contributor: Rossie Rossie
Quote:
Originally posted by pchy
thanks for the reply and advice its great to have this forum and people just like me with the same questions and concerns.

im feeling much better now chatting on here and asking foe advice thank you.

i do really want to try kegel balls ... more
Welcome to the Community!

Since you're a virgin who has never used an insertable toy before, I don't think it's a good idea to try Kegel balls yet. Kegel balls are not easy for you to handle since they're quite large and need to be fully inserted into the vagina. I'd suggest getting a toy such as the Snoo Silicone Mini Vibrator. It's body-safe silicone, it has a total of 10 functions that include escalation, pulsation, and vibration, and it's waterproof. Its width is only 1 inch in diameter. The ridges on the toy are slight and unnoticeable, and should not cause you any discomfort during insertion. You can first use the tip of the toy as a clit vibrator, and try it as an insertable with baby steps. One more thing, don't forget to buy some water-based lubricant to use with the toy — it'll help make you more comfortable.

And honestly, you don't need Kegel balls for Kegel exercise, just follow the instructions in this link.
02/25/2015
Contributor: symbiasin symbiasin
Quote:
Originally posted by pchy
thank you very much for replying

its great that this is a safe and friendly forum to post and ask questions on all this

i never had that advantage growing up to learn about all this.

i lost my parents at a young age and was ... more
Never feel dumb about asking questions...it is still my favorite way to learn. There will always be someone who knows. Welcome to the group!!
02/26/2015
Contributor: Inquisitor Inquisitor
Quote:
Originally posted by symbiasin
Never feel dumb about asking questions...it is still my favorite way to learn. There will always be someone who knows. Welcome to the group!!
Yes, questions are how we learn. There is lots I don't know and understand about women, but, I'm learning more and more every day through the message boards.
02/26/2015
Contributor: symbiasin symbiasin
And the Snoo is good.
02/26/2015
Contributor: pchy pchy
hello all and thank you for the welcome to the message boards and the community

yes i agree asking questions is a great way to find out things you do not know or understand. just little hard for the the way i was raised hard to get those values out of your mind at times.

i am really glad i joined here have soooo many questions. its great to have this to go to.

thank you for the great advice on the kegel balls yes makes more sense not really needing them right now or at all.
02/26/2015
Contributor: pchy pchy
well i ordered my very first "toy" this morning

i ordered the snoo that was recommended. looks great for a beginner
and i also ordered the Lovers tease – clitoral vibrator looked interesting to me in the description. has anyone used this and if so is it any good?

cant wait to get these in the mail. probably sounds strange to be sooo excited for a pleasure toy. cant wait to start exploring and learning and everything people talk about

just wondering for a beginner what is the best position to be in to start your exploration with these toys? with my back problems i am not very flexable but want to get the most out of them.
02/26/2015
Contributor: Inquisitor Inquisitor
Nah, its not weird at all . I look forward to getting stuff in the mail and by courier.

You mentioned that toy have back problems, is this a chronic condition?
02/26/2015
Contributor: pchy pchy
Quote:
Originally posted by Inquisitor
Nah, its not weird at all . I look forward to getting stuff in the mail and by courier.

You mentioned that toy have back problems, is this a chronic condition?
i have back problems from scoliosis have rods and wires along my spine and it makes it very hard for me to bend certain ways or get into certain positions

was wondering for the problem i have what is a good position for trying out my new toys?
02/26/2015
Contributor: Inquisitor Inquisitor
Quote:
Originally posted by pchy
i have back problems from scoliosis have rods and wires along my spine and it makes it very hard for me to bend certain ways or get into certain positions

was wondering for the problem i have what is a good position for trying out my new toys?
Regrettably I'm not qualified to answer this question, however, others might have a little experience with this or have some information that might better serve you. If you post this question in the "Sex & Disability" section under the "Sexual Health" heading, you might get a response sooner.
02/26/2015
Contributor: pchy pchy
Quote:
Originally posted by Inquisitor
Regrettably I'm not qualified to answer this question, however, others might have a little experience with this or have some information that might better serve you. If you post this question in the "Sex & Disability" section under ... more
ok thank you very much

that will be great
02/26/2015
Contributor: Rossie Rossie
Quote:
Originally posted by pchy
i have back problems from scoliosis have rods and wires along my spine and it makes it very hard for me to bend certain ways or get into certain positions

was wondering for the problem i have what is a good position for trying out my new toys?
I believe everyone feels the same way when it comes to waiting for their toys in the mail — you're not alone!

I'm glad you ordered the Snoo! I'm not familiar with the other item you've ordered, the Lovers Tease, what exactly is that?

The most relaxing way to enjoy your new toy is to lie down on your bed and rest your head on your pillow. Have one hand maneuver the toy while using fingers from your other hand to spread apart your outer lips (labia majora). Without turning the toy on, gently rub the surface of your inner lips (labia minora) and clitoris with the tip of the vibrator along with lube. After a while, you can unfold your inner lips and slowly rub the vibrator's head over the vulva area with gentle up and down motion. When you're accustomed and comfortable with these moves, turn the vibrator on and try the same motions over your clitoris and vulva, that should stimulate you nicely without the need to insert the toy. Please remember to go gentle while you're stimulating the sensitive parts with the toy and always use lubricant.
02/26/2015
Contributor: pchy pchy
Quote:
Originally posted by Rossie
I believe everyone feels the same way when it comes to waiting for their toys in the mail — you're not alone!

I'm glad you ordered the Snoo! I'm not familiar with the other item you've ordered, the Lovers Tease, what exactly ... more
hello Rossie thank you for the reply and the great advise

yes the snoo looks really fun
im not really sure or familiar with the lovers tease i saw it in the sale items and looked neat by the description basically says a vibrator to stimulate the clit, nipples and other areas. it fits my budget at the moment and sounds like a fun toy,

yes i am thinking of laying on my back for this i am most comfortable and most relaxed like that which from what i have read from others you really should be relaxed to enjoy exploring your body.

yes great advise on how to use them and i plan on going really slow and taking my time where never done this before. in my opinion there is really no need to rush anything like this. personally i want to get the most out of my first experience.

what kind of lube would be the best for me to get and use with my toys? i have looked at them and there are so many different kinds it is really confusing to me im not sure which one is the right one for my needs. any suggestions?
02/26/2015
Contributor: Rossie Rossie
Quote:
Originally posted by pchy
hello Rossie thank you for the reply and the great advise

yes the snoo looks really fun
im not really sure or familiar with the lovers tease i saw it in the sale items and looked neat by the description basically says a vibrator to ... more
As I've mentioned in my earlier post, you can use water-based lube with the toy. Here are two of the popular brands: Aqua and JO H2O.
02/26/2015
Contributor: pchy pchy
Quote:
Originally posted by Rossie
As I've mentioned in my earlier post, you can use water-based lube with the toy. Here are two of the popular brands: Aqua and JO H2O. ... more
thank you very much
02/26/2015
Contributor: Rossie Rossie
Quote:
Originally posted by pchy
thank you very much
You're very welcome!

You can grab a bottle of Astroglide Natural personal lubricant from your local store (it's water-based) if it's too late to add a lube product to your Eden order.

Have a wonderful time with your new toys!
02/26/2015