Vaginismus

Vaginismus

ToyGurl ToyGurl
Vaginismus, sometimes anglicized vaginism is the German name for a condition which affects a woman's ability to engage in any form of vaginal penetration, including sexual intercourse, insertion of tampons, and the penetration involved in gynecological examinations. This is the result of a reflex of the pubococcygeus muscle, which is sometimes referred to as the "PC muscle". The reflex causes the muscles in the vagina to tense suddenly, which makes any kind of vaginal penetration—including sexual intercourse—painful or impossible.

A woman suffering from vaginismus does not consciously control the spasm. The vaginismic reflex can be compared to the response of the eye shutting when an object comes towards it. The severity of vaginismus and the pain during penetration, including sexual penetration, varies from woman to woman.


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So this is the deal. I once had Vaginismus. I went through a rape and molestation at a young age, and then again during my teen years. I saw a therapist for two years and the Vaginismus had completely gone away as far as I could tell. I never had any issues, and my hubby and I have successfully (obviously, I own like a world of sex toys) had sex for years.

However, my doctor and old therapist think I am "relapsing" and that it has returned. I am curious to how many people have had this "return" or "relapse" and how long it lasted. Please share your stories if you're willing because I would love to get rid of it for good :/

I did get an IUD placed about three weeks ago and I'm wondering if it has something to do with that. Just the mere idea of penetration makes my vagina tense up and hurt really bad

I am going to try and work it out the way I did before. Using sex toys to help train my vagina to have sex again, painlessly. I'm just so broken up about this...
Answers (private voting - your screen name will NOT appear in the results):
Yes, I have had a "relapse"
4
No, my Vaginismus never returned... at least yet.
2
I was able to get rid of it for good
I am still struggling with it
4
Total votes: 10 (9 voters)
Poll is closed
09/22/2011
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Silverdrop Silverdrop
I've never had it, but I did have an IUD inserted, and I remember it hurt like hell, so it seems reasonable that it might have triggered a relapse. Just remember - you beat it before, you can do it again. Best wishes.
09/22/2011
ToyGurl ToyGurl
Quote:
Originally posted by Silverdrop
I've never had it, but I did have an IUD inserted, and I remember it hurt like hell, so it seems reasonable that it might have triggered a relapse. Just remember - you beat it before, you can do it again. Best wishes.
Thanks Silverdrop! That's very kind and motivating of you. I'm really down about it and sometimes I just rely on the EF community to pick my head up. You guys are awesome! following you now if I haven't already!
09/22/2011
ToyGurl ToyGurl
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyGurl
Thanks Silverdrop! That's very kind and motivating of you. I'm really down about it and sometimes I just rely on the EF community to pick my head up. You guys are awesome! following you now if I haven't already!
P.S. - Do you think it may have been the PAIN from the insertion? Anyone have thoughts on that?
09/22/2011
AngelvMaynard AngelvMaynard
I've never had it, however, I'm a big natural herb supplement believer. I recently wrote a piece about natural herbal sexual aides at Liberator Ooh,

link

I wrote about Willow in there. It is an anti-inflammatory herb and I've heard it will help relieve some of the symptoms of Vaginismus. If you live near a health food or herbal supplement store it might be worth a try for your symptoms. Hope you feel better soon!!
09/22/2011
EJ EJ
I think it COULD definitely be the IUD. When I was in massage school, we learned about something called "muscle memory", which you probably already know about if you've gone through treatment for vaginismus. So yes, I think the placement/location of the IUD itself (or the pain of the initial insertion) could have triggered an old traumatic muscle memory. But then, there are various things that can trigger it.

I relapse occasionally too, even though they say that "The process of overcoming vaginismus is generally permanent." But that's ONLY because the "learned abilities are life-long and" (supposedly) "prevent reoccurrence." They do help me get back on track when it does re-occur, but they don't always completely PREVENT it. (link)

I've had issues with irregular periods, severe menstrual cramps and polycystic ovaries from the time I was in my teens. In my twenties I developed vaginismus issues (usually triggered by a bad gynecological visit). Once I started using a Betty's Barbell (a metal kegel exerciser) in combination with deep breathing and pelvic relaxation exercises, I was able to get past it for some years.

Then, in my early thirties, I had another gynecological visit that my body must have registered as traumatic or threatening, because I tightened up again. At that point, two of my gynecologists recommended this website (link) and the dilator set that is sold there. Since I already had several dildos and a vibrator, I just started using them more REGULARLY, along with my breathing and pelvic exercises.

So I think we may have to KEEP using the techniques we learned during treatment in order to maintain the pain-free cycle and to RE-establish it when pain triggers the old cycle and throws us back into spasms.

It also helps a lot if you have an understanding partner who's willing to enjoy other types of sexual activity (besides intercourse) until you can get your body's response back to its normal healthy cycle.

I'll keep your topic post on my "favorite discussions" list for a while and check back in case you need to chat.
09/22/2011
Silverdrop Silverdrop
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyGurl
P.S. - Do you think it may have been the PAIN from the insertion? Anyone have thoughts on that?
Pain, no matter where it happens, tends to make everything in the area tense up. I guess (I'm not a doctor, so this is random guessing) that it's an automatic response to help stop bleeding and prevent further injury.

So the IUD goes in, and there's pain, and muscles start to tense up, and yours decide to return to their familiar pattern.

I wonder if this DVD might help:
The Art of Female Self Pleasuring

Its coming to me as a review item, but it hasn't arrived yet. All I know about it are the reviews. But from those reviews, it sounds like a very healthy set of rituals.
09/22/2011
ToyGurl ToyGurl
Thanks for all the help you guys! I had done another forum post asking women if they became "uninterested in penetration" and then I finally realized that I'm just scared of it. I haven't even taken out many of my dildos in a while. I used one this week, but that was earlier in the week and the other I couldn't even insert it... so that's when I knew.
09/22/2011
LaLaLouise LaLaLouise
I'm so sorry that you're going through this! I'm the kind of person who loves to give people advice (even when they don't ask for it, lol) and can often do so even when it's a situation I haven't been in before. But I feel like I can't in this situation. All I can say is the same that someone else said already, you beat it once, you can do it again! It makes sense to me that it has something to do with the IUD, if it hasn't happened in a while and all of a sudden does right after having it inserted. So while I can't offer advice I can offer LOTS of love and support and send healing vibes your way!!
LaLaLouise~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~SecretToyLove r

(those are my loving healing vibes!)
09/22/2011
ToyGurl ToyGurl
Quote:
Originally posted by LaLaLouise
I'm so sorry that you're going through this! I'm the kind of person who loves to give people advice (even when they don't ask for it, lol) and can often do so even when it's a situation I haven't been in before. But I feel ...
Thanks so much!
09/22/2011
ToyGurl ToyGurl
Quote:
Originally posted by Silverdrop
Pain, no matter where it happens, tends to make everything in the area tense up. I guess (I'm not a doctor, so this is random guessing) that it's an automatic response to help stop bleeding and prevent further injury.

So the IUD goes ...
Thanks so much. Could you let me know when you do your review? I'd love to check that out. I'm sure that would be helpful! I called my old doctor/therapist and he feels the IUD insertion definitely triggered a relapse. He's basically ordered me to slowly train my vagina to get back where I was before the IUD. I wondered if removing it would help, but he said that would only make it worse.

He's actually ordered me to, like he did before, buy more glass dildos (or use the ones I have) and start from the smallest to largest and work my way up. He said to play with them alone, unbothered by anyone or anything, and then allow my husband to enter me once I am aroused and my vagina has loosened itself.

So far its worked a little. Only twice to be honest. I seem to have no problems using the toys but when it comes to sex, all I think about is pain pain pain. It starts to hurt before he even gets his pants off. I'm feeling so... helpless. Not being able to make love to your husband is just awful and I miss that connection with him. The only two times we have been able to have sex it was painful for me, thus, causing him not to enjoy himself...

I'm still trying though. Working slowly and as best as I can. If anyone has more tips, or if anyone has tips on the treatment they were advised to do, please let me know. I would love to hear other methods. My doctor is a little... non-traditional. I have talked to some women who have Vaginismus and they say their doctor never recommended anything like mine does.
09/25/2011
Miss Anonymous Miss Anonymous
Quote:
Originally posted by Silverdrop
I've never had it, but I did have an IUD inserted, and I remember it hurt like hell, so it seems reasonable that it might have triggered a relapse. Just remember - you beat it before, you can do it again. Best wishes.
I think I have to agree with silverdrop! It could have been getting the IUD. That is why I wouldnt use that type of BC, because I don't like people in my vagina. Like silverdrop said, you can beat this agian. Take your time and don't stress out. I know when mines act up, and I stress. It doesn't get fixed. Then I'm left dealing with the problem for longer. I'm currently having a "relaps" and thats what I'm doing, starting from the top again.

I love you STL!
You are my favoirte person on here. I feel bad your having this problem! I'm here for you
09/25/2011
bluekaren bluekaren
OMG!
I have heard of this. I am so sorry you are going through this! Your honesty and obvious determination to overcome this should aide you in beating this thing. Thanks for sharing something, I am sure you will find you are not alone, we seldom ever are.
09/25/2011
LittleA LittleA
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyGurl
Vaginismus, sometimes anglicized vaginism is the German name for a condition which affects a woman's ability to engage in any form of vaginal penetration, including sexual intercourse, insertion of tampons, and the penetration involved in ...
I don't have your condition, but I do have an IUD and it was painful for about a month to have sex, and even a year later certain positions make sex painful. Hope that helps.
09/25/2011
Total posts: 14
Unique posters: 8