:/ Some women just need some horsepower behind their orgasms (or so I've read). Assuming you CAN get off WITH toys, rejoice!

That is partially why vibrators were invented and are still popular! Don't feel bad, it's just another variation in humans. If it's any consolation I can't orgasm clitorally with anything under 5 vrooms, including every imaginable finger activity and faucet action.

This is probably too much info to be sharing but I can't get off without some sort of stimulation to my nips. If they don't get touched then I just can't finish. Maybe you need some boob loving. lol

Lol, on a sex how to forum there's probably no such thing as tmi, violet moonstone

I'd like to offer that your mental state has a great impact on arousal and orgasms, at least in my experience. So, if it's become a big deal, and I can see it becoming frustrating, that frustration can be standing in the way. Try and relax and and pay close attention to each and every sensation, knowing full well that you have that buzzer if all else fails

I was going to mention the idea of trying to 'relax' in some way that 'elrique' posted above.

Another suggestion my be to explore the Art of Cunnilingus. There is an excellent book by Violet Blue titled, “The Ultimate Guide to Cunnilingus”, 2nd edition and published 2010, How to go down on a woman and give her exquisite pleasure. There are some excellent suggestions in relaxing, patience, and the arousal nature of this sexual activity.

Cunnilingus is an age-old practice dating back as early as 300 BC which is the practice of oral stimulation of the females genitals. When people who enjoy oral sex, enjoy it purely for the sensation and that both partners are active. The woman who receives cunnilingus is just as much a participant and entirely up to her in the act as the person who is doing the licking. There is nothing that compares to the warm, wet feeling of a lover’s mouth caressing your most sensitive (clitoris) and private parts. The intimacy and sexual closeness that cunnilingus provides is incredibly arousing for many people. When you're with your lover, going down on her can provide a rush of erotic intimacy that is a very powerful aphrodisiac. Some people also view it as an appetizer to the main course. Having a skilled and knowledgable lover, who knows female anatomy and how women like to be licked, is a circumstance that many women dream about. The softness of a pair of lips, the heat of a mouth, and the slick feeling of a tongue sliding around and over the vulva is a sensation like no other. The feel of a lover’s mouth on a woman’s genitals offers sensations that fingers, sex toys, and penises simply can’t provide.

It doesn't hurt to study this subject; it may make all the difference in kick-starting your sexual bliss!

Make sure you're relaxed and in a place where you won't be bothered! If you're stressed, cumming will be even harder. Do you fantasize about sexual things? For women, the brain is as much a part of masturbation as the clit, so if you're thinking of something that really arouses you, that will help! If you're interested, my favorite vibrator is the We-Vibe Salsa - it's rechargeable and the highest setting is 4800 RPMs!

The only advice I can give you is to not focus on getting off itself. If you have problems you'll feel frustrated and not enjoy what you have.

Also, as other people said, use your brain, close your eyes, imagine and anticipate what your partner might do to you instead of just watching.

Relaxing may help, but as someone who has orgasms since the age of four, I never relax. I need to cut my breath and be as tense as possible. Being that tense makes me squeeze and feel better what I'm doing. But maybe I'm just a freak who's into erotic autoasphyxia. Obviously you shouldn't use objects to strangle you, just cut volontarly your breath so you can start breathing again whenever you need it. But then again maybe I'm a freak. Probably am. *sigh*.

L-argenine, which can be found in many clit or g- spot stim gels can be amazing. It's an amino acid that works as a vassal dilator basically a topical female Viagra that makes blood rush to the surface. I can't get off without it and I looked it up online, trying to find something against the ingredient and I can't! It's great for high blood pressure and helps produce amazing orgasms which we all know are extremely healthy.

agree with cunnilingus. are you against using toys with your partner?

I have the same problem !!! i mean i also have to do a little extra with my partner like touching my clit or using a toy or i just fake it n when i get home i use a toy. i have to have some clit action

You know... I wouldn't really worry about it too much. You are very normal.

You have tried things... try some more. But what ever you do, don't think that there is something wrong with you.

Before sex toys became popular, can you imagine how many women were not orgasming? You can orgasm, but with a toy. That is better than nothing!!!

But, if you really want to give it a go, try not using a toy or any type of stimulation on your clit for one to two weeks. Think of it like a "clit re-boot". Then try.