Does not live up to my crush...

Awkward design - from the opening through the shared vaginal-anal canal to the utter lack of inner texture - make this product very difficult to enjoy. My experience was further hampered by frustrations with ED and the lack of texture providing insufficient stimulus, but I suspect most people would find the toy's awkward shape and weight sub-par for sexual release. Ultimately unworthy of Justine Joli's moniker.
Published:
Pros
Very lovely mold of Justine Joli's vulva, very soft to the touch
Cons
Everything else
Rating by reviewer:
2
extremely useful review

Use

This is a little larger than your typical "pocket pussy" - made out of at least two pounds of Futurotic (a proprietary skin-like silicone-based material), it's not quite portable and is designed primarily for ye old missionary style faux-fucking. We're talking basic toy-assisted masturbation, which is fine.

The design - in theory - allows for hands-free action, a definite plus in a world full of sleeves and tech geeks with RSD (no - not bashing on tech geeks who use sex toys - I'm one of you; just saying that RSD + Fleshlight = not always the most pleasant experience). So, in theory, one can just lay it down on the bed and go to town. In theory... practicality, though, doesn't always measure up.
  • Who / How / What
    [ ? ]
    Who might this product be best for? How is it best used? What are the best circumstances or situations for using this product?
    • Faux-fucking
    • Masturbation
    • Singles
  • Where
    [ ? ]
    Where / what types of places can this product be used?
    • Anywhere
    • On a bed maybe
  • Features
    [ ? ]
    What kind of features does this product offer?
    • Cast from justine joli
    • Tsa amusement factor

Material / Texture

The material is Futurotic - one of the many different skin-like materials to come out of the sex toy wars of the late 90's/early 2000's. If I had to guess, I'd say it's a silicone-derivative based on texture, though without the ease-of-cleaning factors of pure silicone. The material feels porous, which means it can absorb bacteria and virii and because it's a silicone derivative, that eliminates boiling as a sterilization method. So, the short shrift is that I wouldn't recommend sharing this toy without condom use. Then again, does anyone ever recommend sharing pocket pussies?

As for other properties of the material - when it comes out of the box, it is very oily, and has a strong smell vaguely reminiscent of kerosene. It actually gave me a headache, and so I put it in a corner of the room to air out for a day or so. Even now, a month + later, it still remains very oily, which is a little disturbing. I really wouldn't recommend using this on your bed unless you're going to be washing the sheets in the very near future, or are using an under pad if you plan on going the hands-free route. Though, given the design, I'd recommend an under pad anyway - more on that soon.
    • Plush
    • Porous
    • Strong odor

Shape / Design / Size / Fit

Well, back to basics - this looks like what it's meant to emulate - the vulva. Specifically, the vulva of Justine Joli, as it's molded (according to the packaging) from her own. Visually, it's actually quite nice looking, and has one nicety that most similar dual-hole units don't have - wide spacing between the vaginal canal and the anal opening, reducing the risk of tears down the road.

Internally, the anal canal and vaginal canal join into one, which is where things start to get problematic. The anal canal is straight through the device, parallel to the back of the toy. The vaginal canal slopes down and forwards at about 30-45 degrees above the anal/common canal, which means a very sudden bend in the material. That isn't terrible, just awkward. Where it gets more awkward, though, is that the canal is rather short for vaginal penetration - only about 5" from opening to clean-out hole. This means the head of the dick is constantly poking in and out of the toy on the far side. For some people, this may be a moderate problem, but it was unpleasant from my experience and also leaves questions as to cleanup, depending on how far the user "shoots".

The two most inconvenient problems I encountered were that the vaginal opening is rather small, leading to some awkward probing and slip-n-slide moments when trying to enter, and realizing upon entry that the canal has absolutely no texture. You're fucking two pounds of silicone-derivative that has no sensation whatsoever except for the friction between the penis and the canal walls.

As for discretion/hiding - we're talking about a life-size vulva. You're not going to be able to keep it in the open if you want to obscure it, and the box does little to help by displaying Justine's lovely face next to the faux-vulva. It would take quite a set of brass ones to claim it as modern art - it's quite blatant in being a sex toy. This raises the question of why we should have to hide our sex toys in our own bedrooms, but I'll leave the masturbation revolution for another review.
    • Will fit most people

Care and Maintenance

Again - this is a silicone derivative, and should not be assumed to be dunked in boiling water for cleaning. Odds are pretty good that from a vaginal penetration, the user will clear the common canal exit on orgasm. Still, I would strongly recommend cleaning between uses with warm water and a toy cleaner.

The manufacturer provides a small bottle of futurotic treatment to help keep the skin feeling fresh. Honestly, though, the manufacturing process leaves it so soaked in synthetic oils that it shouldn't be an issue for many uses and washings.
    • Difficult to store
    • Hard to clean

Packaging

The packaging lacks any amount of discretion - it clearly depicts Justine and the Futurotic Pussy. It's your typical soft-cardboard outer box with a plastic shell inside containing the goods - the pussy, the Futurotic treatment powder, and a bullet/egg vibrator to insert into the toy while using it. The plastic shell isn't great, but it's not a bad way of holding the toy between uses, provided you cover it somehow. I suggest using the shell because, as mentioned above, the Futurotic material has a certain oiliness to it to start with, which may mark fabrics or paper or leave a residue on wood.
    • Minimal
    • Not discreet
    • Recyclable

Experience

I'll admit it - I had high hopes for this toy. I've had a long-time crush on Justine Joli (back from when she still was going by the stage name "Swan"), so when I saw this toy I thought it'd be fantastic to try out.

After my initial concerns regarding the oiliness of the material (and, to be fair I should note that this is fairly common among a number of the silicone-based flesh-like materials - not just Futurotic) by putting down a towel on my bed, I attempted to find the vaginal opening. This may sound a bit odd, but the hole just wasn't visible - I only found it by feeling from the inside channel up and poking through the material. I suspect that when it was manufactured the hole somehow sealed slightly. After that initial awkwardness, I found the second obstacle - the opening was so tight, I was afraid I would tear the material. When I finally was satisfied that I wouldn't cause a tear, I hit obstacles three and four - the aforementioned awkward bend between the vaginal canal and the common canal, and the utter lack of texture.

As I mention in my profile, I have ED, so you may be able to imagine my frustration with the breaks between each obstacle where I had to work up to an erection again. I'd then attempt to use the toy, only to find another problem would crop up, or that the awkward positioning required for natural thrusting and lack of texture didn't provide enough stimulus for my package. I attempted both missionary position (which the toy *seems* to be designed for) and cowgirl, both times without anything resembling success.

Ultimately, even if the lack of texture and awkward angles and confined opening (which was about the only positive I could give the toy) weren't damning enough, the size of the toy would ultimately doom it. It's too small to naturally thrust into it, and too heavy to use like a sleeve.

I may try using the toy as a basis for teaching myself life-casting techniques, but it is sadly out for erotic purposes.
    • Not enjoyable
    • Untextured
This product was provided free of charge to the reviewer. This review is in compliance with the FTC guidelines.

EdenFantasys Review Program

  • Get Free Toys
  • Enjoy Special Deals
Become a Reviewer
This review was edited by
  • SparklingReviews Contributor: SparklingReviews
  • Rank:
    5.5 / 10
  • Edited reviews: 73
Comments
Subscribe to comments
  • Contributor: MR Chickhabit
    shame about this toy. thanks for the review
  • Contributor: potstickers
    This kinda looks like a masturbation cube. Thanks for reviewing!
  • Contributor: LostBoy988
    Excellent job on the review
  • Contributor: EdenJP
    Thanks for the review!
  • Contributor: Allstars316
    Great review
  • Contributor: elrique
    Good review
  • Contributor: richsam
    Thanks for the review
  • Contributor: locomotion
    great and thorough review!
  • Contributor: Undead
    Thanks for the review.
  • Contributor: Andrey2052
    Excellent review!
  • Contributor: SadoMas
    tyty
  • Contributor: damnbul12
    Thank you for the review.
  • Contributor: spineyogurt
    Thanks for the review.
  • Contributor: ILikeShinyThings
    Great review!
  • Contributor: asandahl
    thanks!
  • Contributor: nosrslylol
    Thanks!
  • Contributor: Artishok
    Thanks for the review
  • Contributor: drock
    cool
  • Contributor: Major Panda
    Great review
  • Contributor: Steve99
    Great review
Forum
Discussion Posts Last Update
how do you use one of these with a partner? 3
Thank you for viewing Justine's futurotic vagina – realistic vagina review page!