I'd Rather Fuck a Tin Can

The best way to use this product is to chuck it in a trash compactor and compress it like the Shredder's helmet in the live-action TMNT. Really though, the object in question carries a nasty scent and some horrific innards, the likes of which can only be found in something like the 33rd circle of HELL.

In reality, one sticks their member inside this hardened pocket pussy and proceeds to toss their nuts off. There's a wired vibration remote. The level of pleasure can be adjusted via dial, but it isn't even worth it. The best thing to do with this part is to take the bullet out of the fat lips and use it on yourself or your partner. The hand held device stimulates all parts of the penis, but in the worst possible way.

This toy will, however, work very well for anyone wishing to leave slight injurious fissures in their shaft. So if you like it really rough and painful, maybe you'll have a grand time.

This poly vinyl chloride toy comes with a unnaturally-infused cherry scent reminiscent of some of the worst medicine I remember from my childhood. The additional pathetic volume of cherry lube doesn't help this hardened vagina either. There's no addition of stimulation or any thing good for that matter. It's hard, rough, and...mean. It's like an angry beast that lures you in with a sign saying "Nice Doggy, I Swear." Don't buy it. Just...stay...away.

The design of this toy is pretty poor. It's got a long shaft...but not long enough. It's got lips...that one doesn't need to push through. They're about two inches apart. This is the furthest thing from realistic I have found on this site or any sex shop for that matter.

The whole thing is terrible!

As long as one separates the attached remote control from the pocket itself, it's easy to clean with soap and water. Be sure to fully dry your toy after cleaning.

Any lube is usable with this product.

RUUUUUUUUUUN!

It hurt.