Broken Promises and a Sad Pet

I was excited when I got this toy as an assignment. It promised great vibrations and many other wonderful things. It lied. I'm heartbroken. The vibrations are merely okay at best, the off button is too easy to hit, completely killing the mood, and the cycles are "weird." I love the design and look of this toy, but it's just not what I expected in the least bit. If you like light vibrations or are a beginner, then this is a good choice for you. It can be used for vaginal or clitoral stimulation, but the warnings on the included paperwork clearly state not to use it for unexplained leg pain. (I don't know...that's just what it said.)

I have to say, this is a beautiful toy made from a very firm, velvety silicone with a black base. A plus being it's latex- and phthalates-free, along with hypoallergenic. There was no noticeable smell when I opened the package. I admit I like to just "pet" it. The texture is intriguing and the curves and ridges are deep, giving it a unique feel both in hand and while in use.

As I mentioned above, I love the way this is made. The design flows nicely from a basically rounded tip into deep curves and ridges that are set at a slight angle. The head is slightly larger than the middle where the ridges begin and then swells back out gently towards the base. The ridges themselves are almost like finger grips in width and depth, a lot like what you would see on a handle of a gardening tool. I will admit, this leads to an interesting experience when inserted. It's meant to be a g-spot vibrator and I can see where the design would help with that. The base is basic black and holds the controls for the vibration. Two finger tip sized buttons let you move up and down the cycles easily, too easily, with a small LED light between them. The LED changes between three colors, letting you know what strength vibration is being delivered: red is strongest, orange is medium, and yellow is lightest (quite interesting light show with this one, too). The battery compartment is on the end with a screw-on base that holds four AAA batteries and it is waterproof. A rubber seal on the battery compartment makes it very tight. I felt like the base was too short on this. It's hard to hold on to and leads you to accidentally hit the controls and change it or shut it off completely...not something I see as a good thing right in the middle of playtime!

Length: 8 1/2"
Insertable length: 5 1/4"
Circumference: 5 1/2"
Diameter: 1 3/4"

There are ten different vibration modes which are cycled through by the press of one of the buttons and you can move through the cycles in either direction, up or down.

•Cycle 1: fast, medium pulses.
•Cycle 2: hard two second burst, followed by a quick medium pulse and repeated.
•Cycle 3: three pulses—two medium, then one hard.
•Cycle 4: five pulses, all medium of varying degree, ranging from light to harder then repeating.
•Cycle 5: short bursts that build in intensity, starting at the lightest with two pulses at medium as it reaches a medium level then moves to a steadying hard, solid vibration, followed by two more medium pulses, and repeats.
•Cycle 6: cycles up from lightest to strongest again with the short bursts (almost like a car that needs a tune up) and as it reaches the hardest vibration does two medium bursts and cycles back down again.
•Cycle 7: three pulses of each intensity, then short, tiny bursts that slowly build up from light to hard, and repeats.
•Cycle 8: steady, light vibration.
•Cycle 9: steady, medium vibration.
•Cycle 10: steady, hard vibration.

The Rondo can be shut off by either cycling through all the settings or if you press and hold either button for a few seconds. The intensity of the vibration is where I have a problem with the toy. Maybe I just want a motor akin to a jet engine but the Rondo just didn't do it for me. It promises the world and only delivers a cheap, gift shop t-shirt. I just can't figure out why the box boasts "thousands of people around the world secretly salute" it. I will give it credit, it is very quiet. I would say almost, but not quite, as loud as the vibration mode of my cell phone, and because of its material, when laying on the table still isn't very loud on the hardest setting. (My roommate is sleeping through the cycle descriptions and it's laying on the desk beside me—he can hear a vibrator buzz from a mile away usually!)

This is the part I get to say something nice! Yay! Rondo is super easy to clean! I love silicone! There aren't little creases for ick to get into and you can clean this with your favorite toy cleaner and warm water with your hand being the only scrubbing tool you'll need. It's also bleach-able. Being silicone, you can use your favorite lube and not have to worry about taking forever to clean it all off or any kind of damage being caused. As for storage, I don't let any of my toys touch each other, just in case, so I would always suggest storing it either in the box it came in (molded hard foam liner included) or perhaps a silk bag of some sort. I have noticed a few pet hairs collected by it, but no where near as bad as, say, a jelly toy! It's almost more of a static type situation than a sticky one. Better safe than sorry...rinse before each use.

The packaging is quite classy! A cardboard sleeve featuring the photograph and basic information (including a diagram of the vibration modes and a statement claiming not to have been tested on animals...guess the hamsters missed out on this one!) slides over a well built cardboard "box," all in a white, almost glossy, finish. It has a nice, hard foam liner with a cutout of the toy that is definitely suitable for storage later. The little information pamphlet lays on top. A well written, slightly comical welcome page proceeds directions for inserting batteries and functions details written in English, German, French, and Spanish. Here is where you will find the warning not to use on unexplained calf pain and other basic precautions. (I guess it's okay if the calf pain has been explained...?) I would have to say the packaging on this toy fits its price range. It's something I wouldn't mind keeping in my toy box.

I'm just not impressed at all with this toy's functions. The vibration cycles and modes are not stimulating at all for me. They seem almost distracting. I like the firmness and feel of it, and if the vibrations were stronger, then maybe it would be better for me.