And so I went through IMDB and threw together some of my favorite quotes in an order that will make you see Star Wars anew for the first time.
(Contains actual quotes, but not in their actual order.)
Obi-Wan: [intervening for Luke] This little one's not worth the effort. Come, let me get you something.
Obi-Wan: I have something here for you. Your father wanted you to have this when you were old enough, but your uncle wouldn't allow it.
Obi-Wan: Hello there.
[R2 beeps]
Obi-Wan: Come here, my little friend. Don't be afraid.
[R2 beeps a question]
Obi-Wan: Oh don't worry, he'll be alright.
C-3PO: We're doomed.
C-3PO: I thought that hairy beast would be the end of me.
********
Luke: I've gotta get *home*, it's late, I'm in for it as it is!
Obi-Wan: I need your help, Luke. She needs your help. I'm getting too old for this sort of thing.
********
Greedo: That's the idea... I've been looking forward to this for a long time.
Han Solo: Yeah, I'll bet you have.
Han Solo: Sorry about the mess.
********
Imperial Officer: Where are you taking this... thing?
Gold Leader: *We're too close!*
Gold Five: Stay on target!
Deck officer: It's possible he came in through the south entrance.
Gold Leader: [shouts] Loosen up!
Gold Five: It came from... behind!
********
Obi-Wan: Only passengers. Myself, the boy, two droids... and no questions asked.
Han Solo: [chuckles] What is it? Some kind of local trouble?
Obi-Wan: Let's just say we'd like to avoid any Imperial entanglements.
********
Han Solo: She may not look like much, but she's got it where it counts, kid.
********
Princess Leia: I recognized your foul stench when I was brought on board.
********
Luke: Boy, it's lucky you have these compartments.
Han Solo: This is *not* gonna work.
Luke: Why didn't you say so before?
Han Solo: I *did* say so before.
Luke: You've got something jammed in here real good.
Han Solo: Get in there, you big furry oaf! I don't care what you smell!
********
Princess Leia: You came in that thing? You're braver than I thought.
********
Princess Leia: It's not over yet.
Han Solo: It is for *me*, sister.
Princess Leia: That doesn't sound too hard.
Han Solo: Don’t get cocky.
********
Han Solo: Look, Your Worshipfulness, let's get one thing straight.
Princess Leia: Put that thing away, you're gonna get us all killed!
Han Solo: Absolutely, Your Worship. Look, I had everything under control until you led us down here! There's an awful lot of moisture in here.
Princess Leia: It could be worse.
Han Solo: It's worse.
Han Solo: And I thought they smelled bad on the OUTSIDE!
Princess Leia: Will someone get this big walking carpet out of my way?
Han Solo: I must've hit her pretty close to the mark to get her all riled up like that.
********
Cockpit Biggs: Luke, at that speed do you think you'll be able to pull out in time?
Luke: THE WALLS ARE CLOSING IN.
********
Han Solo: You're all clear, kid, now let's *blow* this thing and go home!
(Contains actual quotes, but not in their actual order.)
Obi-Wan: [intervening for Luke] This little one's not worth the effort. Come, let me get you something.
Obi-Wan: I have something here for you. Your father wanted you to have this when you were old enough, but your uncle wouldn't allow it.
Obi-Wan: Hello there.
[R2 beeps]
Obi-Wan: Come here, my little friend. Don't be afraid.
[R2 beeps a question]
Obi-Wan: Oh don't worry, he'll be alright.
C-3PO: We're doomed.
C-3PO: I thought that hairy beast would be the end of me.
********
Luke: I've gotta get *home*, it's late, I'm in for it as it is!
Obi-Wan: I need your help, Luke. She needs your help. I'm getting too old for this sort of thing.
********
Greedo: That's the idea... I've been looking forward to this for a long time.
Han Solo: Yeah, I'll bet you have.
Han Solo: Sorry about the mess.
********
Imperial Officer: Where are you taking this... thing?
Gold Leader: *We're too close!*
Gold Five: Stay on target!
Deck officer: It's possible he came in through the south entrance.
Gold Leader: [shouts] Loosen up!
Gold Five: It came from... behind!
********
Obi-Wan: Only passengers. Myself, the boy, two droids... and no questions asked.
Han Solo: [chuckles] What is it? Some kind of local trouble?
Obi-Wan: Let's just say we'd like to avoid any Imperial entanglements.
********
Han Solo: She may not look like much, but she's got it where it counts, kid.
********
Princess Leia: I recognized your foul stench when I was brought on board.
********
Luke: Boy, it's lucky you have these compartments.
Han Solo: This is *not* gonna work.
Luke: Why didn't you say so before?
Han Solo: I *did* say so before.
Luke: You've got something jammed in here real good.
Han Solo: Get in there, you big furry oaf! I don't care what you smell!
********
Princess Leia: You came in that thing? You're braver than I thought.
********
Princess Leia: It's not over yet.
Han Solo: It is for *me*, sister.
Princess Leia: That doesn't sound too hard.
Han Solo: Don’t get cocky.
********
Han Solo: Look, Your Worshipfulness, let's get one thing straight.
Princess Leia: Put that thing away, you're gonna get us all killed!
Han Solo: Absolutely, Your Worship. Look, I had everything under control until you led us down here! There's an awful lot of moisture in here.
Princess Leia: It could be worse.
Han Solo: It's worse.
Han Solo: And I thought they smelled bad on the OUTSIDE!
Princess Leia: Will someone get this big walking carpet out of my way?
Han Solo: I must've hit her pretty close to the mark to get her all riled up like that.
********
Cockpit Biggs: Luke, at that speed do you think you'll be able to pull out in time?
Luke: THE WALLS ARE CLOSING IN.
********
Han Solo: You're all clear, kid, now let's *blow* this thing and go home!
Jenny you scare me. In that good way.
Wow. *This* would make Star Wars sooo much more interesting!
Have you ever heard of the Star Wars Pants Game? You take a star wars quote and replace a word with 'pants'
"You came in those pants? You're braver than I thought!"
"Lock the door. And hope they don't have pants."
" You are unwise to lower your pants. "
"A tremor in the pants. The last time I felt it was in the presence of my old master. "
"Jabba doesn't have time for smugglers who drop their pants at the first sign of an Imperial cruiser. "
Star Wars was actually a porno. . .Obi-Wan = Oh Big One Knob, Hans Solo = HanDs Solo, Princess Leia = Princess Lay-her, and then at the end, all of the "X" and "Y" fighters have to try to get into a giant sphere and only one of them can make it. . .Luke hears a voice telling him to "use the force" and then he get's in and explodes. . . .
My personal favourite: "Pull out, Wedge, you're not doing any good back there!"
Awesome! Love it!
Haha....I've never even SEEN (any of the movies) Star Wars, and this is funnny stuff!!! Yeah...don't make fun of me, please! I just do. not. like. SCIFI!
This is SO funny. I love "It came from...behind." Because who doesn't love a good anal sex joke?
Also, to the above poster who hasn't see Star Wars because they don't like Sci-fi, Star Wars is a Fairy Tale. It takes place long ago in a land (galaxy) far, far away. Yoda is like a fairy godmother, Princess Leia is the princess that needs saving from the Dark Lord (Vader) who imprisoned her, and Han Solo is the Lance-a-lot (The Knight/bad boy) type character who saves her. It's very romantic. "I love you." "I know"
I. Love. You. No Joke.
Princess Leia: You came in that thing? You're braver than I thought.
This is the best. You are the best. And now I kinda wanna watch Star Wars...
I'm definitely going to have to re-watch Star Wars now!
too cute. thank you
Hysterical
you have literally just made my day.. marry me?
This is why I need to read your blog more often! *dies laughing*
I was a VERY OLD 3 year old when Star Wars came out. I knew it was porno material the moment I saw Luke Skywalker smile! *sigh* And I wonder why I am the way I am NOW.
Love this!