If Dr. Seuss wrote Strap-on Poetry

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If Dr. Seuss wrote Strap-on Poetry

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Contributor: Pegaholics Pegaholics
If Dr. Seuss wrote Strap-on Stories

Would you like it in your ass
I would not like it in my ass
It might hurt, or I might have gas
It won't hurt I tell you now, you will not need to say oww
Can I shove my dildo in, I don't think it would be a sin
Just an inch or maybe two, I'll even lube it up for you
Not an inch, not two nor four, I'll take no dildo from a whore
No need for names, I just want to please.
Did you just give my ass a squeeze?
What if I will rub your cock, lick your balls and rub your cock?
Not if you rub, not if you suck, my ass is not for you to fuck!
What if I let you squeeze my tits, fuck my ass and squeeze my tits?
That sounds good, but still no way, you will not fuck my ass today.
Hey, why do you lube up your dong, clearly you must be hearing wrong.
I said no way, yet you pursue, what can I say to convince you?
I guess your right, I guess you win, opps, I just slipped it in.
Say, I like that dildo in my butt, I'll gladly be your strap-on slut.
Fuck me in my ass all day, shove that dildo in all the way.
You can fuck me with a dong, whether it be short or it be long.
I'll open up my ass to you, I love it in my ass it's true.
But wait, what is that white stuff off in space, it is cum landing on my face.
You made me shoot my load so far, I thought it was a shooting star.
Thank you for slipping in, now please will you fuck my ass again?

If you liked it, this poem is from our strap-on blog at link
09/15/2011
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Contributor: GingerAnn GingerAnn
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Contributor: LaLaLouise LaLaLouise
This is super cute. I'm not into pegging (or anything anal) but I can still appreciate good poetry
09/15/2011
Contributor: alliegator alliegator
Quote:
Originally posted by Pegaholics
If Dr. Seuss wrote Strap-on Stories

Would you like it in your ass
I would not like it in my ass
It might hurt, or I might have gas
It won't hurt I tell you now, you will not need to say oww
Can I shove my dildo in, I don't ... more
That sounds good, but still no way, you will not fuck my ass today.

By that line I was laughing pretty hard. (Ok, yeah, I did comment just to use one of the new emoticons)
09/15/2011
Contributor: ScottA ScottA
Nice, except for this:

"Hey, why do you lube up your dong, clearly you must be hearing wrong.
I said no way, yet you pursue, what can I say to convince you?
I guess your right, I guess you win, opps, I just slipped it in. "

Nice fantasy, but everyone here should know by now that no means no, and you don't go on to "have it just slip in".
09/16/2011
Contributor: paralax paralax
Quote:
Originally posted by Pegaholics
If Dr. Seuss wrote Strap-on Stories

Would you like it in your ass
I would not like it in my ass
It might hurt, or I might have gas
It won't hurt I tell you now, you will not need to say oww
Can I shove my dildo in, I don't ... more
its goofy because its Seussy but i like it!
09/29/2011
Contributor: Rawhide Rawhide
Ha! Nicely done
09/30/2011
Contributor: Wildchild Wildchild
Quote:
Originally posted by Pegaholics
If Dr. Seuss wrote Strap-on Stories

Would you like it in your ass
I would not like it in my ass
It might hurt, or I might have gas
It won't hurt I tell you now, you will not need to say oww
Can I shove my dildo in, I don't ... more
I would deffinatley read his book more often. Nice poem
09/30/2011
Contributor: Beaners Beaners
Hilarious. Absolutely sharing this with my boyfriend.
09/30/2011
Contributor: CrimsonCat CrimsonCat
Haha. This is crazy.
10/03/2011
Contributor: MeliPixie MeliPixie
This is beautiful. I'm so sharing this with my boyfriend. XDDD
10/30/2011
Contributor: Owl Identified Owl Identified
Quote:
Originally posted by ScottA
Nice, except for this:

"Hey, why do you lube up your dong, clearly you must be hearing wrong.
I said no way, yet you pursue, what can I say to convince you?
I guess your right, I guess you win, opps, I just slipped it in. ... more
I was thinking the same thing - pretty disturbing. Thanks for saying it, I didn't have the heart since everyone seemed to think it was so funny.
10/30/2011
Contributor: Discreet Lover Discreet Lover
That was very cute! It got a smile out of me and I really needed to smile right now.
10/31/2011
Contributor: ScottA ScottA
Quote:
Originally posted by Owl Identified
I was thinking the same thing - pretty disturbing. Thanks for saying it, I didn't have the heart since everyone seemed to think it was so funny.
Yes, it's funny, and we all probably have fantasies about that one activity that our partner doesn't want to do turning into something they love the first time... but ...

It doesn't work that way in real life. Keep the intentional accidents in fantasy land and make sure you talk stuff like this out first in real life.
11/12/2011