So Many Opportunities Lost; The Book That Could Have Been... Better

This book had a lot of potential; Explaining sex toys to the uninitiated. Sadly, it has failed.

Although some info was good, like how to start using toys with a lover, and some anatomy drawings helpful, much of the data was outdated, much safety information was either outdated or simply missing, and no brand names, essential to new toy users, were mentioned.

The tone of the book was silly and immature. There are better books on the subject although obviously more are needed.
Published:
Pros
info on how to introduce sex toys to lovers, some good line drawings
Cons
lack of safety info, out of date info, silly alliterations all over, too many exclamation points!
Rating by reviewer:
2
extremely useful review
This small book is an introduction to sex toys for beginners, excluding safety warnings.

It is loaded with exclamation points, it is great at stating the obvious “the clitoris is the center of the orgasm” and has a lot of “cheer leader” type comments and attempts to become intimate with the reader by using slang in a way that is almost embarrassing to see. To me, it is reminiscent of a very long Cosmo article.

The book works somewhat adequately to introduce those who are either very new to sex toy to them, or to reduce some people’s anxiety or fear of sex toys. In fact, in addition to much of the text telling us that it’s “OK” to use sex toys and doesn’t make a man any less of a man to use a sex toy with his woman. The first nine pages of this thin tome are dedicated exclusively to trying to convince people that sex toys are nothing to fear or become intimidated by.

For a beginner, or for someone whose partner is threatened by sex toys because he or she is not familiar with them, that is really helpful. But, this book will be old news to most who have even a small collection of sex toys, who understand how to use sex toys, and no issue with using them.

The book is filled with line drawings of erogenous zones, sex positions and people using toys. For those unfamiliar with toys, these pictures are very helpful. For those with more experience and sophistication in the use of sexual implements, these drawings are amusing (and well done) but not anything new. Yes, the pictures are helpful, but only for those who are very new to the world of sex or not familiar with their own bodies. While this would be great, the author misses the boat on many common mistakes and dangers of some sex toys, uses and lubricants. Which, of course, then makes it not the greatest book for beginners, who need more data on safety than anyone else.

The book is peppered with little text bubbles, in grey entitled “Sadie Says!” with “helpful” gems like ”Don’t forget, the human hand is one of the best sex toys of all time. Uh, OK, Dr. Obvious.

There is also some misinformation and lost opportunities in this book. For instance on page 41 “…of course any dildo can be used for anal play” Not really, and not safe advice. In the ten page chapter entitled “The Anal Playground” she mentions flared based butt plugs and the idea that anal toys could be “sucked in” without careful play, but she doesn’t carry through this idea with other toys for anal use nor give enough information on how to avoid this problem.

Not to mention that the book was almost entirely devoted to heterosexual couples. More data which includes GLBT couples and people would have made this book useful for more people.

Carrying through with the “less than safe ideas” theme, she recommends using electric toothbrushes, candles, rubber handles of cooking utensils, sofa arms, and even vegetables for sex play, (even… corn on the cob.) Most familiar with safety in sex play can see the inherent problems with using most of these instead of safe toys designed and manufactured for sex play specifically.

The book recommends many outdated latex toys, and also “stacking” more than one condom at a time on penises and sex toys (so you don’t have to wash when going from anus to vagina!) which is known to be a great breakage hazard. There are less than two pages on lubricants, an not a word about commonly irritating ingredients like glycerin, sugar, honey etc contained in many lubes. She mentions that many lubes contain glycerin, but misses the opportunity to tell people that so many are sensitive to it and its role in causing vaginal and urinary infections. (The lube with her name contains glycerin.)

Chapter Nine is called Rousing Toys for Daring Boys She mentions cock rings, vibrating penis rings, penis pumps, balls spreaders “penis thickeners” (to be worn during sex for “female pleasure”) and “Nearly real vaginas” (lower torso molds) imagine a legal substitute for a vagina that’s tight, safe, satisfying—and you don’t have to buy it dinner.” (Face Palm) But, she only devotes a half page each to Prostate Toys and masturbation sleeves.

The book also has the increasingly irritating habit of not mentioning toys by name or manufacturer. Sure, there are drawings (no photos) of commonly used and well known toys like Hitachis, Wahls and others, but no mention of what they are called by name or manufacturer. Knowing what you are buying is so important, and a line drawing, to those who are not yet familiar with what to buy isn't helpful.
Experience
The book has a shiny cover with part of the face of a woman, with some photos of what I think are blurred sex toys underneath the title, (why are they blurred? I can’t tell what they are.) A photo of “Dr. Sadie Allison” on the back, along with Cosmo like ravings along with "Over 40 toy-tested techniques for mind blowing orgasms" and How to hide your personal sex toys from prying eyes. Along with, in very large letters the words Are you getting the orgasms you deserve? It is about the size of a standard paperback, with fairly high quality paper. All the drawings are in gray scale, and there are no photographs aside of the cover and back.

There are 13 chapters in the book, ranging from “How to Spring a Sex Toy on a Lover (probably the most helpful and least damaging chapter in the entire book) through “Anal Playground”, “Strap One On” “Curious Sex Tchotchkies” (yes, she uses that word) “Lubricants of Love” “Getting Ready for Pleasure” and other fairly predictable alliterative titles.

I made my way through this book in less than an hour the first time, with 140 pages of text and drawings plus a very short bibliography. The book also includes advertisements for “Dr” Sadie’s own lubricant (no idea what its ingredients are, as they are not listed) and ads for her website, and two of her other books, including Tickle His Pickle.

I was not impressed with this book, thought it left too much out about safety, could have been more specific about brands and left most of the puns, alliteration and exclamation point sentences back at Cosmo, where they obviously belong.

It might be a good book for those very new to sex toys, but as commonly known safety concerns are simply not addressed I can’t even suggest it for newcomers.

Tristan Taormino’s book on sex toys must be a better buy and will be my next purchase. This book is resigned to the back of my closet.
Follow-up commentary
I have not come to like this book in the intervening months since my original review. It is still a poor guide and outdated.

I also do not feel comfortable passing it on to a less informed about sex toys friend, because of the missing and incorrect safety information, the outdated presentations and the overall lack of quality of the information the book both presents. Also the amount of good data left out could fill a volume.

I will wait for a better book on sex toys and their usage to pass on to friends and to use on my own.
This content is the opinion of the submitting contributor and is not endorsed by EdenFantasys.com

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Comments
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  • Contributor: ZenaidaMacroura
    Great review. This sounds like a really awful book that wouldn't be of much use to anyone. And I HATE that "and you don't have to buy it dinner!" kind of crap.
  • Contributor: leatherlover
    Wow, that sounds horrible. I don't think it deserves the back of the closet, more like the bottom of a recycling heep.
  • Contributor: ToyTimeTim
    Sounds like fire starter to me, I sure hope not to many folks get this.
  • Contributor: Shellz31
    I got this awhile back and I'm not impressed with it either! I haven't been able to make it all through the book and I can't see it happening now...lol.

    Great review
  • Contributor: P'Gell
    Thanks, Ladies and Gents. I found out the book was discontinued. I don't know if only Eden discontinued it, or if it's going out of print.

    I have no idea if her other books (like Tickle His Pickle a book on fellatio) are this silly, but I hope not.
  • Contributor: Ivy Wilde
    Thanks for the review. Too bad the book was so lacking.
  • Contributor: B8trDude
    This sounds like a terrible book! I can't believe that she had a section on using "even vegetables for sex play, (even… corn on the cob)" and barely discussed masturbators. The least she could have done was discuss humping water melons (no, I have NOT tried that). Great review!
  • Contributor: P'Gell
    Thank you all.

    Yeah. B8trDude, I was pretty stunned at the vegetable and kitchen appliance section. WTF?
  • Contributor: *Huxley*
    I always thought the corncob as a sex toy was a joke. Sick!
    Otherwise, great review P'Gell!
  • Contributor: P'Gell
    Thank you, Huxley.
  • Contributor: meitman
    Great review. Thanks!
  • Contributor: P'Gell
    Thank you, meitman.
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