Sexist Coffee Ads Made Right

But I do find it quite entertaining to imagine switching the genders and having the women be disgusted with something the men actually did produce themselves. Let’s try it again with a few changes…




Husband: Wonderful anniversary dear, and thank you for the flowers!

Wife: You’re welcome, darling. But if you could do one thing for me?

Husband: What?

Wife: Try to do something about your man-milk!

Husband: Oh, I ‘d hoped it would be better today.

****

Wife: Oh, no.

Husband: What’s wrong?

Wife: Ew, it’s your jizm again. The desk sergeant at the station makes better jizm than this!

***

Wife: How can such a handsome husband make such bad cock-chowder?

***

Wife: Forget the jizz, Phil. It’s never very good.

Husband: But Marge, I –

Wife: I’ll get some at the plant.

***

Husband: Did you ever see Ellen looking so happy?

Wife: Well honey, happiness is a vacation…from your jizm.

***

Wife: Ugh! This sperm is CRIMINAL. *spits it in the garden*

Husband: Honey! You’ll kill the petunias!

Wife: Then you admit it! Your sperm really IS murder!

***

Wife: Honey, your splooge just doesn’t taste any good.

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Yep. That’s totally better.

Now join me on the EdenFantasys forum to write your own captions...