plus it seems to have made my first time a lot less painful/scary.
Featured by EdenFantasys
Do you think it's weird for a virgin to have her first penetration by a toy?
10/26/2012
I think it only counts as "losing your virginity" if you feel that it does. My first penetrative experience was with a sex toy, and I think that it can be empowering to know your body and how it responds before you bring another person into the mix.
11/05/2012
I don't think its weird at all. I would prefer my child not have sex with a person until they were mature enough to know what they enjoyed. That's exactly what a toy will allow.
11/05/2012
I played with dildos before I started having sex and don't think its weird. I'm quite glad I did as I knew what to expect and didn't have pain my first time so it worked out well for me.
11/05/2012
I just can't imagine inflicting the pain of virginity loss on myself
11/05/2012
Definitely not weird to me. Do whatever you are most comfortable with.
11/07/2012
Hey! Guess what? Masturbation isn't sex! Being penetrated with something while you are all on your own is called masturbation! I do it all the time, just like a lot of women. When you have sex...it involves another human. Yep! Fascinating I know, but penetration does not equal sex!
Sorry, my condescending tone isn't aimed at the poster of the thread or anyone really...just dumb girls who are like, "tee-hee! If something goes in my cooter, I'm no longer a virgin! Oh no! My tampons! Why did I not realize it before?! Oh no...my gyno took my virginity! I was penetrated! Oh my God, I can't wear white on my wedding day!"
Just...stop. Masturbate, be happy, don't listen to your idiot girlfriends who don't educate themselves about sex. Grr.
Sorry, my condescending tone isn't aimed at the poster of the thread or anyone really...just dumb girls who are like, "tee-hee! If something goes in my cooter, I'm no longer a virgin! Oh no! My tampons! Why did I not realize it before?! Oh no...my gyno took my virginity! I was penetrated! Oh my God, I can't wear white on my wedding day!"
Just...stop. Masturbate, be happy, don't listen to your idiot girlfriends who don't educate themselves about sex. Grr.
11/07/2012
Quote:
I am sorry to be so late getting into this discussion, and by now the issue may be resolved.
Originally posted by
marrythenight
The reason I'm asking is because I was talking to some girlfriends about toys not too long ago, and they do know I'm a virgin, and I did say that I got an actual vibe recently (the bcurious bgood--it's still sitting in my closet in its
...
more
The reason I'm asking is because I was talking to some girlfriends about toys not too long ago, and they do know I'm a virgin, and I did say that I got an actual vibe recently (the bcurious bgood--it's still sitting in my closet in its box, unopened) and one of them said, "I would never lose my virginity to a sex toy!" Which of course started a conversation about what defines virginity, etc, but it's kind of stuck with me.
It's kind of an odd question, but do you think it'd be better to save first penetration for the "real deal", or just go for it with a toy? And would you even consider that loss of virginity? less
It's kind of an odd question, but do you think it'd be better to save first penetration for the "real deal", or just go for it with a toy? And would you even consider that loss of virginity? less
For one it is not a loss of virginity. Mostly because virginity was created by people as a means to measure a woman's virtue. Simply breaking one's hymen via penetration brought on by masturbation does not make a girl loose their virtue.
Another consideration to the fact is that in almost countless events throughout history, accidental penetration which led to the tearing of the hymen has occurred. Hell, I even know of a girl who at only 6 years old fell off her bike and had the handlebar rammed up her twat, she was badly hurt, but when I met her and begun dating her at the age of 22...she said she hadn't been a virgin since she was 17....which was the first time she had consensual sex with a guy.
11/07/2012
I don't think it's a bad idea might put her more at ease later.
11/07/2012
not weird at all. don't worry, have fun.
11/07/2012
I don't think it's weird.
11/07/2012
I wouldn't consider it loss of virginity
11/08/2012
I wouldn't consider it a loss of virginity. I used toys first as well. I went through puberty and such, got very curious and just kind of went for it because I wasn't about to just run out and have sex with someone. I think it's a good idea for the many reasons others have stated.
I must say though, after quite a bit of experimenting with masturbation, when I did finally have sex I was very disappointed. But I think that was my choice of partner haha.
I must say though, after quite a bit of experimenting with masturbation, when I did finally have sex I was very disappointed. But I think that was my choice of partner haha.
11/08/2012
Its not a loss of virginity. I think that can only be done by another person.
11/08/2012
Your friends don't know what they are talking about and are missing out. Using a toy first will help you learn about your body and what you like before you add the complication of another person.
11/09/2012
Never worry about it!
Actually my first penetration was by a toy too. As long as you enjoy it, do it! By definition loosing virginity is when a man inserts his penis into your vagina, and not a second sooner. So even if you use a toy, you would remain a virgin.
Also if you get used to the penetration like this it will urt less wehn it comes to the real deal. Any guy who has a problem with "toys were already there" and values your virginity less for it, is not worth the trouble, and is a real asshole for wishing you would hurt more just to stroke his ego.
Also with toys you can go gradually - and work up from small to average. A dilso you can set aside, and if you dont like it, you dont have to move it in and out like a guy would want to move.
Using a toy is all about just you.
Having sex is about both of you - so I guess its a good way to prepare, to learn what you like!
Actually my first penetration was by a toy too. As long as you enjoy it, do it! By definition loosing virginity is when a man inserts his penis into your vagina, and not a second sooner. So even if you use a toy, you would remain a virgin.
Also if you get used to the penetration like this it will urt less wehn it comes to the real deal. Any guy who has a problem with "toys were already there" and values your virginity less for it, is not worth the trouble, and is a real asshole for wishing you would hurt more just to stroke his ego.
Also with toys you can go gradually - and work up from small to average. A dilso you can set aside, and if you dont like it, you dont have to move it in and out like a guy would want to move.
Using a toy is all about just you.
Having sex is about both of you - so I guess its a good way to prepare, to learn what you like!
11/11/2012
Naw
11/11/2012
Quote:
While i applaud your position on the use of toys before sex, your position on loss of virginity is very narrow. By your definition, a 'gold star' lesbian can have sex, oral, fingers, even fisting, toys, strap ons, etc and still be a virgin. She could be carrying every std on the planet because, yes, lesbians can contract STD's from each other but still be a virgin. A woman could enjoy all these things with a man too, even a penis anally but still be a virgin according to this school of thought.
Originally posted by
Arlinnae
Never worry about it!
Actually my first penetration was by a toy too. As long as you enjoy it, do it! By definition loosing virginity is when a man inserts his penis into your vagina, and not a second sooner. So even if you use a toy, you ... more
Actually my first penetration was by a toy too. As long as you enjoy it, do it! By definition loosing virginity is when a man inserts his penis into your vagina, and not a second sooner. So even if you use a toy, you ... more
Never worry about it!
Actually my first penetration was by a toy too. As long as you enjoy it, do it! By definition loosing virginity is when a man inserts his penis into your vagina, and not a second sooner. So even if you use a toy, you would remain a virgin.
Also if you get used to the penetration like this it will urt less wehn it comes to the real deal. Any guy who has a problem with "toys were already there" and values your virginity less for it, is not worth the trouble, and is a real asshole for wishing you would hurt more just to stroke his ego.
Also with toys you can go gradually - and work up from small to average. A dilso you can set aside, and if you dont like it, you dont have to move it in and out like a guy would want to move.
Using a toy is all about just you.
Having sex is about both of you - so I guess its a good way to prepare, to learn what you like! less
Actually my first penetration was by a toy too. As long as you enjoy it, do it! By definition loosing virginity is when a man inserts his penis into your vagina, and not a second sooner. So even if you use a toy, you would remain a virgin.
Also if you get used to the penetration like this it will urt less wehn it comes to the real deal. Any guy who has a problem with "toys were already there" and values your virginity less for it, is not worth the trouble, and is a real asshole for wishing you would hurt more just to stroke his ego.
Also with toys you can go gradually - and work up from small to average. A dilso you can set aside, and if you dont like it, you dont have to move it in and out like a guy would want to move.
Using a toy is all about just you.
Having sex is about both of you - so I guess its a good way to prepare, to learn what you like! less
I'd also like to point out that with a thoughtful, considerate, patient partner, first time PIV sex doesn't have to be painful or uncomfortable or scary at all. This is a myth and the result of people being clumsy, uninformed, and careless in their inexperience. Penises and pain are unnecessary for loss of virginity, however, neither, as i said in earlier posts, does penetration with a toy mean anything about a woman's 'purity' or whatever.
11/11/2012
absolutely not! I think it's weird for girls to NOT think about putting something up there. Curiosity is healthy and good for you, and this is such a safe way to explore.
11/11/2012
I totally understand your query. No I don't think it "counts," but it's so psychologically loaded that it's hard to make the decision and just go for it. I'd say if you're going to go for it solo make sure you set things up to be as pleasurable for you as possible (enough lube, good mood, etc.). It's still one of your firsts even if it's not the first, and the more relaxed, the more awesome.
11/24/2012
I don't think it's weird at all. I think it makes sense.
11/24/2012
I don't think it's weird,and I would not consider it the loss of you're virginity.
11/25/2012
Quote:
I do not believe using a toy means you have lost your virginity, no more than I believe you can be deflowered by using a tampon!
Originally posted by
marrythenight
The reason I'm asking is because I was talking to some girlfriends about toys not too long ago, and they do know I'm a virgin, and I did say that I got an actual vibe recently (the bcurious bgood--it's still sitting in my closet in its
...
more
The reason I'm asking is because I was talking to some girlfriends about toys not too long ago, and they do know I'm a virgin, and I did say that I got an actual vibe recently (the bcurious bgood--it's still sitting in my closet in its box, unopened) and one of them said, "I would never lose my virginity to a sex toy!" Which of course started a conversation about what defines virginity, etc, but it's kind of stuck with me.
It's kind of an odd question, but do you think it'd be better to save first penetration for the "real deal", or just go for it with a toy? And would you even consider that loss of virginity? less
It's kind of an odd question, but do you think it'd be better to save first penetration for the "real deal", or just go for it with a toy? And would you even consider that loss of virginity? less
I used toys before I became sexually active, it is not even close to the same thing. There is something very unique about each experience, and both a perfectly valid. Do not worry about penetrating with a toy.
In my case, penetrations was uncomfortable and unenjoyable with toys, fingers etc before I had sex. After having sex those things became enjoyable for me. Before, I really only enjoyed clitoral vibrations. You may find your situation similar once you try it, each person is different.
Regardless of what your friends think, it is ultimately up to you to decide. Some people don't consider anal sex to be losing your virginity, I do. It's a very personal thing and you should come to your own conclusions about it. Good luck, and enjoy!
11/25/2012
It's NOT weird or a loss of virginity
11/25/2012
Quote:
Nope I dont see the problem and she'd still be a virgin
Originally posted by
marrythenight
The reason I'm asking is because I was talking to some girlfriends about toys not too long ago, and they do know I'm a virgin, and I did say that I got an actual vibe recently (the bcurious bgood--it's still sitting in my closet in its
...
more
The reason I'm asking is because I was talking to some girlfriends about toys not too long ago, and they do know I'm a virgin, and I did say that I got an actual vibe recently (the bcurious bgood--it's still sitting in my closet in its box, unopened) and one of them said, "I would never lose my virginity to a sex toy!" Which of course started a conversation about what defines virginity, etc, but it's kind of stuck with me.
It's kind of an odd question, but do you think it'd be better to save first penetration for the "real deal", or just go for it with a toy? And would you even consider that loss of virginity? less
It's kind of an odd question, but do you think it'd be better to save first penetration for the "real deal", or just go for it with a toy? And would you even consider that loss of virginity? less
11/25/2012
Quote:
I personally don't think having a toy penetrate you is a loss of virginity. Many girls do not have a hymen from sports activity alone at this point and so the whole idea of "virginity" meaning a guy will "pop your cherry" is silly and ancient.
Originally posted by
marrythenight
The reason I'm asking is because I was talking to some girlfriends about toys not too long ago, and they do know I'm a virgin, and I did say that I got an actual vibe recently (the bcurious bgood--it's still sitting in my closet in its
...
more
The reason I'm asking is because I was talking to some girlfriends about toys not too long ago, and they do know I'm a virgin, and I did say that I got an actual vibe recently (the bcurious bgood--it's still sitting in my closet in its box, unopened) and one of them said, "I would never lose my virginity to a sex toy!" Which of course started a conversation about what defines virginity, etc, but it's kind of stuck with me.
It's kind of an odd question, but do you think it'd be better to save first penetration for the "real deal", or just go for it with a toy? And would you even consider that loss of virginity? less
It's kind of an odd question, but do you think it'd be better to save first penetration for the "real deal", or just go for it with a toy? And would you even consider that loss of virginity? less
I think many young woman have toys long before human lovers.
11/25/2012
Quote:
It isn't weird at all..
Originally posted by
marrythenight
The reason I'm asking is because I was talking to some girlfriends about toys not too long ago, and they do know I'm a virgin, and I did say that I got an actual vibe recently (the bcurious bgood--it's still sitting in my closet in its
...
more
The reason I'm asking is because I was talking to some girlfriends about toys not too long ago, and they do know I'm a virgin, and I did say that I got an actual vibe recently (the bcurious bgood--it's still sitting in my closet in its box, unopened) and one of them said, "I would never lose my virginity to a sex toy!" Which of course started a conversation about what defines virginity, etc, but it's kind of stuck with me.
It's kind of an odd question, but do you think it'd be better to save first penetration for the "real deal", or just go for it with a toy? And would you even consider that loss of virginity? less
It's kind of an odd question, but do you think it'd be better to save first penetration for the "real deal", or just go for it with a toy? And would you even consider that loss of virginity? less
11/25/2012
Cat E.
I do think it's a bit weird.
11/25/2012
I wouldn't consider it loss of virginity.
11/25/2012
It might make your first time with a guy less nerve wrecking
11/25/2012