My Vagina Wants an Apology, But My Back Says Thank You

If you like mild vaginal torture, then this is the dildo for you. It is a very aesthetically pleasing, very textured dildo that has many, many bumps that provide a painful drag. My vagina was just not impressed; a little disappointed rather. On the upside it does double as a wonderful massage tool.
Published:
Pros
Gorgeous
Can be used as Massage tool
Free Pouch
Cons
VERY intense texture
Painful
Not pouch described on product page
Rating by reviewer:
2
extremely useful review

Use

This is a glass dildo that is supposed to be used for thrusting. It can also be used very effectively as a massage tool. This should not be used anally, despite the safe material because this has no flared base and trust me, you do not want to lose this in your bum. I tried this first with my partner which was a mistake because it is always best to test the waters with a new toy yourself. I used this solo for slow thrusting and slow rotation which was alright. It must be used with caution due to the material and the risk for injury to the cervix/vagina. It should be inspected for chips or any damage before each use. I would not recommend this for a glass or texture beginner, as it would be too much texture for sure; if it is gotten as a first glass toy and the texture is a turn off it could turn a beginner off of glass entirely. It is ideal for someone who craves a whole lot of intense texture and can handle this well. Definitely a dildo for a texture loving experienced with glass advanced user. Because it is pyrex glass it can also be used for temperature play.
  • Who / How / What
    [ ? ]
    Who might this product be best for? How is it best used? What are the best circumstances or situations for using this product?
    • Couples
    • Solo
    • Temperature play
  • Where
    [ ? ]
    Where / what types of places can this product be used?
    • Anywhere
    • Campus/roommate living
    • Tub/shower/pool
  • Features
    [ ? ]
    What kind of features does this product offer?
    • Travel friendly as long as it is in a protected pouch/area
  • Body / part areas
    [ ? ]
    What areas on the body can this product be used / what areas does it stimulate best?
    • G-spot

Material / Texture

The Rainbow Nubby Wand by SSA glass is made of pyrex which is a very durable glass that does quite well with temperature changes. If it does break it is likely to break into large chunks and not as likely to shatter. It is totally non-porous and can be sterilized because of this. There was no smell or taste noted. It has a great deal of texture. It is covered in tons of small bumps that provide a ton of drag and if you are someone that adores a whole lot of texture and borderline vaginal torture then this is for you. You WILL feel every single bump (I did anyway). The texture for me was just too much; I could feel each bump "pull" at my vaginal wall which was disappointing because I was truly hoping to love this. With very slow thrusting and rotation of this dildo by myself, when I am already very turned on, it is somewhat stimulating, but if I thrust a bit too hard or rotate it too quickly it just hurts. Maybe I have a tender vagina, who knows?

TOP VIEW TO SHOW TEXTURE



SIDE VIEW TO SHOW TEXTURE

    • Bumpy
    • No odor
    • Not porous at all

Design / Shape / Size

This dildo is very gorgeous to look at with tons of bumps on it in various colors. It is what attracted me to this dildo in the first place. The size appears to be perfect. It is rather slender being only 1 1/8" in diameter. It is 8" long and about 7" can be inserted. I could not insert this a full seven inches because there is no curve and it did hit my cervix. The slender girth is made up for with the many raised bumps. It would be a good fit for most people if it were not for the intense texture of this dildo. The one thing I can say about the bumps and my man agrees, is that they make the dildo very easy to grip and hold onto even with very slick fingers. The bumps are supposed to provide intense stimulation everywhere inside the vagina and the vaginal opening, but I just could not enjoy this gorgeous toy this way. How pretty this is and because it is a solid shape throughout and not remotely realistic it is really discreet. It could be mistaken for a paper weight and if it didn't work so well as a massager then I would have just ended up using it as one.

Simply GORGEOUS right?

    • Discreet look/design
    • Whimsical / artistic

Performance

This dildo just did not perform well for me. Too much texture with no curve. If it had ridges or larger in diameter and further spaced apart bumps I feel that this would have been an excellent dildo and I would have been delighted to use it. Since the bumps are very small and close together they almost feel a bit spike like and create too much pain for me to have this perform as a dildo. I tried to, I really did. I used it solo quite a few times with little success no matter how many different ways I tried to manipulate it and in partner play as a dildo it just hurt. I can't even be gentle enough with it myself to enjoy it, let alone enjoy it with my partner manipulating it.

I did coat this in massage oil, coat my man in massage oil and give him a rub down with this using it the same way one would use a rolling pin. He really enjoyed this, especially on the back of his body. I of course wanted this reciprocated and this does feel awesome as a massage tool. When it is nice and slick it feels great rolling across your back, butt and thighs. I will keep it around for a massager for sure. That is why this earns two stars, because it still has a use at least; despite the fact that it will never go in my vagina again.
    • Great massage tool

Care and Maintenance

The Rainbow Nubby Wand is fairly easy to care for. Since there are so many bumps close together it has to be cleaned well. It takes a little time and inspection to make sure that it is really clean. It can be sterilized in a 10% bleach solution, in the top rack of your dishwasher or by boiling if and only if you are really careful. To boil you must be careful taking it out of the water and DO NOT cool it too quickly. Let it rest on a towel and cool down on its own terms; otherwise if it cooled too quickly it may weaken or crack.

Because this is glass any lube; water, oil and silicone based are all safe to use with this. I personally will be using massage oil only with it.

I store mine in the bag it came in. The product page boasts a padded bag, but mine came in a very thin but cute velvet bag with a drawstring. It was also wrapped in bubble wrap. I got rid of the bubble wrap (after popping the bubbles of course) and just keep it in the pouch in my large toy bag. The pouch offers no real protection though, so I do recommend getting a padded pouch for it if you can not ensure its safety. The drawstring doesn't stay pulled tight on the pouch so I tie mine with a simple loop through and then the dildo will not fall out of the pouch.

POUCH



HOW I TIE MY POUCH - IT WORKS WELL

    • Easy to clean
    • Easy to store

Personal comments

Do not let my personal opinion of this wand affect your decision on this totally. Just make sure that you like incredibly intense texture first. I do have other glass with lighter texture that I highly enjoy, this is just not the one for me.
Follow-up commentary
Try as I might,
since it's sight brings such delight,
I just don't love my rainbow nubby wand.

It hurts something fierce
as though it might peirce
my poor, poor tender kitty

Even if I cum, once, twice even thrice
Inserted this is flat out not nice
and might I add, ouch dammit!

So vagina don't fear
This will never get near
your tender walls again.

But rainbow don't feel bad
left out or sad
Because I won't let you get dusty

I'll coat you with oil and lay on my belly
And you can roll on my back until my knees go all jelly
And you will not be forgotten

Just never forget or get too upset
And yes even if I'm incredibly wet
That there is simply nothing you can do
To make this vagina be a good friend to you
This content is the opinion of the submitting contributor and is not endorsed by EdenFantasys.com

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This review was edited by
  • Shellz31 Contributor: Shellz31
  • Rank:
    6.7 / 10
  • Edited reviews: 385
Comments
Subscribe to comments
  • Contributor: Love Lula
    Thanks for the review. I've been wondering if the bumps might be painful in some cases.
  • Contributor: EmeraldDawn
    Thanks
  • Contributor: surreptitious
    All the "personal massagers" that are really vibrators makes me laugh to think that this dildo actually makes a great massage tool.
  • Contributor: snowminx
    I really enjoyed the poem that you wrote as the follow up lol
  • Contributor: Chastity Darling
    LOVE your follow-up
  • Contributor: Sexy Housewife
    Thanks for your review. I just got this toy and i personally love it but you do have to be careful not to thrust it too hard. But i love the bumps.
  • Contributor: cas9238
    Thanks for the review, I was thinking of maybe getting this but now I probably won't. And love the poem, haha!
  • Contributor: wist
    Great review. Poem made me laugh.
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