The New Topping Book - book discontinued by Greenery Press - review by novanilla

The authors (Dossie Easton and Janet W. Hardy) are really knowledgeable and experienced. They both have queer and heterosexual, bottom and top BDSM experiences, which leads to a well-rounded, accessible book for all. And in terms of accessibility, this is really easy to read. It's not bogged down in big words, and they explain all of their terms, even those that are commonly known BDSM terms, like bottom or top, so that people of all levels of BDSM experience can enjoy this--even just those curious to get a peek into our world. They are not heteronormative at all either, which is fabulous. They alternate between she and he pronouns and don't always place the she as submissive. Although they could be better about their trans* issues, like how they put "ed" on the end of transgender, overall I think they did a good job of not basing this book on social and cultural norms. After all, BDSM is non-normative in so many ways, so why should our discussion of it be? They even included a short section about racism within the BDSM community, and recognize that most BDSM groups are almost all white and college educated from privileged class backgrounds. While the privilege section wasn't perfect, it was an honest effort that was appreciated, and it was not included in The New Bottoming Book, which I also reviewed.

In short: The authors are truly veterans of BDSM and know what they're doing. They have taught many workshops and classes and their knowledge really shows.

"We love tops. We love tops who are vicious and nasty and turn their bottoms into cringing mounds of adoring submission. We love tops who are nurturing and sweet while they inflict the most amazing agonies. We love tops whose aura of command is so straightforward and matter of fact that their bottoms can completely forget, for a little while, that the world is a complicated place. We love top daddies and top mommies, top nurses and top interrogators, sweetheart sadists and control queens, nurturing dominants and mean mistresses, nasty kids and mad scientists. We love tops so much that we're writing a book to help make sure there are more good ones: tops who glow with the pure white light of control, power, intimacy and love; tops who are skilled at their craft and passionate about their art; tops who pour themselves into their bottoms, beat well, and create a dish as fiery as curry or sweet as pie." -Intro to Chapter 1, Hello Again!, The New Topping Book

This is a really great book for tops to get to know themselves, remove their guilt of getting turned on by brutal fantasies that would not be consensual in the real world, and become better tops in the end. It is not an instructional manual in the traditional sense of the word, but it does have a fair amount of tips and a nice list of toys used by tops and their descriptions as well as safety tips. This book has more instructions in it than The New Bottoming Book, but I think that it works that way. Tops need to have a lot of hard skills like knowing how to properly flog so that people don't get hurt. There are suggestions throughout the book in relation to these skills, such as practicing flogging on something inanimate like a pillow in order to get your aim just right. With proper aim, a top can avoid hitting a bottom in places that could cause real damage or are off-limits to that bottom. These are the types of tips you will find in this book.

The authors stress sex-positivity but also recognize that a lot of people in the world do not accept kink. I think this is a good and realistic outlook. They're super accepting of all types of fantasies and consistently remind the reader that topping is okay, and actually in very high demand, and that there is nothing wrong with wanting to dominate someone in bed, or even out of bed, if it is truly consensual and boundaries are respected.

I consider myself to be pretty experience, though not to the extent of the authors, of course, and I still got a lot out of this book. It is only more recently that I've begun to use toys aside from rope, handcuffs, and blindfolds, because I'm a more hands-on kind of girl. I like to bite and smack with my own hands rather than use a flogger or nipple clamps for instance. I've never really gotten much recognition for that for whatever reason, but this book, although it did not spend much time on it, did validate that tops who only use their own bodies to dominate people are just as much tops as the rest of them.

This is a regular paperback book with a glossy lime-green cover. People into BDSM will recognize "topping" as a term, but it's not very obvious. The cover is as pictured. Nothing crazy. In the O there is a person with a whip over the shoulder, but it is small enough that you can barely tell unless you are paying attention. The back is just praise of the book by others. It's a thin book that can easily fit in a bag.

I think that the layout of the book makes sense. I don't have much to say about it. Here are pictures of the table of contents and the close up of the O:





There is also a nice resource list in the back of the book, including other books that you can read. There is also a list of other books by the same publisher, which also focus on BDSM. Some of these are more instructional based or focus on one part of BDSM like flogging or bondage.

I bought this book as a gift for my partner, who I bottom with despite my past experience solely as a top. I bought it in conjunction with The New Bottoming Book, which I also reviewed. I learned a lot from this book about what to expect from a top when I'm bottoming, and also how to improve as a bottom myself. I was pretty confident in myself as a top before, but I realized that even after years of experience doing BDSM, I still can always learn more and become better. I'm really glad that I purchased this book for my partner, and I enjoyed it so much that I'm going to get myself a copy too so I can keep it around for when I top again!

I think that I found this useful partially because I primarily top, but I think that any bottom would also really enjoy this read, as I suggested with The New Bottoming Book as well.

I haven't given this to my partner yet and won't for a couple of weeks, but I already have taken so long to do this review that I didn't want to wait until then, plus wait until he reads it. In the follow-up review, I will be sure to include his thoughts, since I doubt I will have any new ones.