Rubs the Wrong Way

Don't buy this, seriously. It's a bit of a disappointment and a waste of money--you could get a better bullet vibe for less. It promises "unique enjoyment" on the package and that's absolutely right. I didn't think I'd get so much unique enjoyment out of reading aloud the terrible English and making people uncomfortable in it's presence. Too bad it's not water-proof though, with the heat it gets the next unique enjoyment I could get out of it would be in keeping my tea hot.
Published:
Pros
Discrete-sized
Easy to clean
Hilarious packaging
Cons
Overheats
Hard to work / No instructions
Cheaply made
Incredibly Loud
Rating by reviewer:
1
useful review

Use

Though it's small and pretty discrete, it has some major flaws. I suppose you could use it all over, though I'd warn you not to press it directly against your genitals, as it runs a bit on the hot side (doesn't that defeat the purpose of such a small vibe?). Honestly, the best use of this bugger would be on the run. Slip it into your overnight bag. It's also small enough to fit into a purse, or if you're feeling a bit cocky, into your pocket (though I'd be careful, it's apt to turn on that way).
  • Who / How / What
    [ ? ]
    Who might this product be best for? How is it best used? What are the best circumstances or situations for using this product?
    • Everyone
    • Solo
  • Where
    [ ? ]
    Where / what types of places can this product be used?
    • Campus/roommate living
  • Features
    [ ? ]
    What kind of features does this product offer?
    • Travel friendly
  • Body / part areas
    [ ? ]
    What areas on the body can this product be used / what areas does it stimulate best?
    • Clitoris
    • Nipples

Material / Texture

This vibe has a really hard texture to it that's sort of unpleasant, actually. No smell, it's made of hard plastic. So, while it's pretty safe it's just not very fun. It feels quite cheap. Like the thinness you expect of cheap plastic cups. The worst of it is that there are some flaws in the plastic, probably a problem in the mold. The lines where the device pops apart to put in the batteries has some sharp bits that probably would have hurt, hadn't I worn them away with my thumb.
    • No odor
    • Not porous at all
    • Rigid

Design / Shape / Size

The design would have been well done if not for the way you open it. You have to give it a squeeze, sort of popping apart Easter eggs? The shape of it is small and easily slipped into a purse, so it is very much a "pocket wand". Also, another issue is actually getting the damn thing to work. You have to position it just so to get everything to line up. It's a two-handed job, which honestly is a bit on the not-good side, considering it's such a small vibe.
    • Beginner
    • Discreet look/design

Functions / Performance / Controls

It overheats and it's noisy. Very noisy, in fact I don't think you could use it nearly as discretely as it's shaped. Its controls are shoddy at best. It's too much of a hassle to actually get it to run without turning off. The heat is so bad that you have to turn it off and wait for it to cool down. It gets much too hot for placing it against sensitive bits. I'd be worried that it would get too hot and actually melt its cheap casing.
    • Battery guzzler
    • Hard to figure out
    • Not discreet at all

Care and Maintenance

You can use water, silicone or oil-based lubes with it because it is plastic. Don't submerge it in water, but you can wash it with soap and water. Literally one of the few redeeming factors of this toy is how easy it is to take care of, and that's saying something.
    • Easy to clean
    • Easy to store

Packaging

This comes in a clamshell plastic container. They advertise it "Russian Torpedo". If anything, it's Chinese-made. The Engrish on the packaging is hilarious to read. The label tells you the battery requirements (2 AA), how to care for it, and warns: "[d]o not use on any open wound, skin lacerations or swollen or inflamed areas." In short, it tells you nothing really important, like how to actually use to toy. You can use the box as a container but that defeats the purpose of being so small and discrete.
    • Not discreet

Personal comments

This was a bit of a disappointment for a first real toy. I didn't get much use out of it, to be honest. I don't like being burned in the genitals. Good thing this was a gift, otherwise I would complain a lot more about wasting my money. I can't believe EdenFantasys actually sells such a dismal, useless vibrator, although I can understand giving them away.
This content is the opinion of the submitting contributor and is not endorsed by EdenFantasys.com

EdenFantasys Review Program

  • Get Free Toys
  • Enjoy Special Deals
Become a Reviewer
This review was edited by
  • Woman China Contributor: Woman China
  • Rank:
    6.4 / 10
  • Edited reviews: 351
Comments
Subscribe to comments
  • Contributor: married with children
    thanks for sharing.
  • Contributor: Zombirella
    This sounds scary! Burning?! No thanks.
Forum
No discussions yet.
Thank you for viewing Pocket wand – pocket rocket discontinued review page!