The Pretentious Slut

I truely believe this book must be valuable to those who are already familiar with the poly life. However, for those who are just opening themselves up to the topic, it can be incredibly abrasive and condescending. I wouldn't recommend it to anyone who is not already fairly secure in their choices, as well as knowledgeable about the various sex, gender, and relationship terms used.
Published:
Pros
The Author has an honorable objective which is easy to identify with.
Cons
The voice is ridiculously condescending to those who are monogamous.
Rating by reviewer:
2
useful review
The overall concept of the book is interesting--to be an "ethical slut", openly poly, etc. It isn't a new concept anymore, but at the time of the original printing it was relatively groundbreaking. This has been toted as a bible, a must read, and as invaluable. However, beyond the very basic agreement that the word slut should be reclaimed, I am not seeing eye to eye with this book.

The author's voice is at times very snobby and elitest when referring to the poly lifestyle versus those who choose to lead monogamous lives. A book such as this has the opportunity to educate those who are both familiar and unfamiliar with the challenges and benefits to leading a poly lifestyle. In my opinion, however,the author has failed miserably in capturing the potential audience of readers who are not already experienced. The voice she uses in absolutely unaccepting, and at times scathing.

There are some sections here and there that are useful, but it seems to me for the most part that this book is written more for those who are already deep in the trenches of the poly lifestyle rather than those who are just dipping their toes in or who are looking for a basic education. Ultimately I gave my copy to my sister and she has enjoyed it. For what it is worth, the book does come highly recommended which is why I initially purchased it. I was looking for some material on how to navigate a poly relationship and several people pointed me in this direction. However, I preferred a less biased voice, probably because I am very inexperienced in this area, and lean heavily in the monogamous direction. This book made me feel like the author believed those who choose to remain monogamous are uneducated and naive.
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This review was edited by
  • Femme Mystique Contributor: Femme Mystique
  • Rank:
    6.1 / 10
  • Edited reviews: 242
Comments
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  • Contributor: Badass
    I've been wondering about this book for awhile.. I would prefer a more rounded guide geared toward "those just dipping their toes" as well.
  • Contributor: Bex1331
    Good review, you really captured the authors perspective, but I would like to hear a little more about the topics included in the book.
  • Contributor: thisisadeletedaccount
    Nice review, glad you're not afraid to offer critique, but it would have been nice to hear more about what the book DID say and do, not just where it fell short. You said some sections were useful - what were those sections?
  • Contributor: Lady of the Lab
    I appreciate your honest critique, but I gave this a low rating because you don't go into detail about the content of the sections. Although you do describe the author's tone, it would've been clarifying if you mentioned/paraphrased something demonstrating the tone being condescending.
  • Contributor: nosrslylol
    Thanks for your review!
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