Glad it was free...

I seriously hate this toy. I hate it so much. Though I got it free, I ended up SPENDING money in order to finish this review because it ate the batteries in one night when it was turned off. Vibrating eggs are a lovely concept, and power to the wireless ones, but this one is just a hunk of junk.
Published:
Pros
Was free for me, plastic, easy to clean
Cons
Doesn't work when I close my legs, loud, weak, buzzy, eats batteries in a DAY when it's off!
Rating by reviewer:
1
extremely useful review

Use

This product by Shaki toys is sold as a remote controlled vibrating egg. Before I talk about the downfalls of this toy, allow me to talk about what this is supposed to do. The idea behind a toy with a wireless remote is that you don't have to fiddle around with the toy itself to change the settings or turn it off, which is a great concept.

Vibrating eggs like this can be inserted and used internally. While they're not good at all for thrusting, you can squeeze on it and have it vibrate inside you. The way to get this toy out is simply to loop your finger through the retrieval cord and gently pull. You can also use your pelvic muscles to aid in pushing it out.

You also can wireless eggs externally. Be it when you're solo in your bedroom or if you're looking for something to play with in public, the controller makes it easy to change the settings even if your toy is tucked into your panties.

Eggs like this can be used anally if you keep a tight hold in the cord, but I still would highly discourage it (especially with something as low quality as this one) because the cord does pose the risk of becoming disconnected. If you're looking for an anal toy I'd say that it's better to be safe than sorry and go for something with a flared base.

Vibrating eggs are lovely couples toys, especially in public. If you're looking to watch your partner wiggle across the room when you surprise them by turning this on, it's certainly a great way to tease and get them all riled up. It also can be used a bit in power play since one person is holding the controller.

Solo, wireless eggs would be an okay place to start. They're usually a bit too expensive and aren't as versatile as I usually recommend for a beginners toy, but if you have your heart set on it this isn't a bad area to start with. They're especially nice because you don't have to get tangled in cords.

My one problem is that this egg can't do any of that. More on this later, but this is so useless for most of those uses it's not even funny.

This egg certainly doesn't pass Ryu's dorm seal of approval. It's loud and buzzy (it can be heard over the public showers and through the thin walls on medium when you don't clench it in your fist) and only the egg part is waterproof for playing in the showers. It is fairly easy to care for and stash places, but that doesn't quell my frustration with this toy.
  • Who / How / What
    [ ? ]
    Who might this product be best for? How is it best used? What are the best circumstances or situations for using this product?
    • Bachelor/ bachelorette party
    • Gag gift
  • Where
    [ ? ]
    Where / what types of places can this product be used?
    • On a bed only
  • Features
    [ ? ]
    What kind of features does this product offer?
    • Travel friendly
  • Body / part areas
    [ ? ]
    What areas on the body can this product be used / what areas does it stimulate best?
    • Clitoris

Material / Texture

This toy is entirely made of pink plastic. The remote and the egg both have cords (that should contain the antenna) that appear to be thread covered in a flexible plastic tube. Plastic is rated an 8 out of 10 on the Eden Safety Scale. It's nonporous and body safe, which means that bacteria can't get inside the material and grow and also that it doesn't contain any harmful chemicals that can seep into your body.

Along with basic maintenance, you can also wipe plastic down with a 10% bleach solution. This will disinfect the toy and kill any bacteria that may be lingering on the surface. This needs to be done every time you switch orifices (even though I don't recommend this for anal play) or you switch users.

This plastic has almost no drag to it, but if you're not very warmed up you still might want to use a little bit of lube when inserting it. A little bit of lube goes a long ways on this product. The slick surface makes plastic a great material to use on the go because it doesn't grab onto lint and you don't necessarily need to bring lube.

This toy is also entirely smooth and entirely firm. Smooth textures are great for those just starting to get into toys, as well as those who just don't like a lot of texture. The firmness would be a bit bad if this was your first toy, but since you can't use it for thrusting it won't be easy to bruise yourself with.

Overall, plastic is a material that I think both beginners and advanced users can appreciate. It's body safe and nonporous properties make it great to use and keep for a long time. While it may be too firm for a thrusting toy if you or your partner are less experienced, plastic is a great material for an egg like this.
    • Not porous at all
    • Rigid
    • Smooth

Design / Shape / Size

The design of this toy also isn't where it falls short of expectations. The egg and remote are both wireless, allowing for you to ideally not have to fiddle around with the toy to change the settings. This is a great design, and it's even more fun when you hand the remote control over to a partner.

The egg itself is fairly short, and thus why it's not the best design for thrusting. It's about 2 inches long from where the cord starts to the tip. The controller it about 2.5 inches long, and fits well in my hand and in my pocket. The cord for the bullet is just under 5 inches long, and for the remote is about 3 inches long. While you can hook the remote onto your keychain, I wouldn't want to risk damaging the antenna that's contained inside of it.

The egg itself is shaped, surprise surprise, like a chicken egg. It's not quite as asymmetrical as an actual chicken egg, but it still fits the description. Around the widest area it's about 4.5 inches around, but because it's not at my entrance it doesn't feel too thick. If you're someone who likes feeling 'stretched' or 'filled' this may not be an ideal design for you.

If someone saw the remote controller it might draw a bit of attention, but not too badly. If you're a man and you tend to like more 'masculine' things this might look out of place in your hand or pocket, but as a woman you could always pass it as a fancy key fab if they don't look too closely.

The egg itself isn't too discreet, especially if they have any knowledge about vibrators. While it's not obscene looking, it might be best to stash it away if you're planning on having guests over, especially if you don't want them knowing that you have a sex toy.

Because it's a bit on the blunt side, this isn't the ideal toy for pinpoint clitoral stimulation. It might be best for those out there who like the vibrations to be distributed over a wider area. Similarly, if you tuck this into your panties it's not going to be easy to get it to sit exactly on your clitoris. It's easiest just to get it in the general area and then shift the way you're standing/sitting to get it where you want it.

Overall, this is a pretty good design for a toy. If it worked better I would recommend it, but as it is I can only recommend wireless eggs in general.

Here's a picture of the egg and remote VS a pen:
Egg VS Pen

Here's a picture of the remote:
Egg Remote Detail

Here's a picture of the egg open:
Egg open

And a picture of the remote open:
Egg remote open
    • Beginner
    • Partner play
    • Whimsical / artistic

Functions / Performance / Controls

One thing that I want to mention before anything else is that this toy is a complete battery glut. I used it once and then started writing this review, and then after leaving it off in my drawer overnight I had to wait a week to finish the review because the batteries were dead. If you store this you HAVE to take the batteries out when you're done!

The next thing that I want to mention is that this toy is really only good for masturbation when you're laying down with your legs open. When I close this in between my thighs (as if I was wearing it in public) it can turn ON fairly easily, but it won't turn off or change settings.

There are two buttons on the remote that control this toy. There is a power button, and below the power button there is a settings button. Even though this claims to have 10 functions, there really are only 7 on the egg I received.

The settings are as follows:
1) Low (1 vrooms, 1 bees)
2) Medium (1.5 vrooms, 2.5 bees)
3) High (2 vrooms, 4 bees)
4) bbBBBBZZZ bbBBZZZ
5) BZZ BZZ BZZ BZZ
6) BZBZBZBZBZ
7) High again (2 vrooms, 4 bees)

The 7th setting really feels just the same as the third setting to me, but I think that it may be intended to be a higher intensity. The nice thing about having a separate power button is that you can turn this off in a hurry without having to cycle through all the other settings.

The vibrations in the egg are very buzzy and topical, and if you're holding it for more than a few minutes your fingers do start to feel a bit buzzed-out. Because of this I really don't like this as much for clitoral stimulation because for me deeper vibrations are a must.

This toy is also waterproof, but because it's so crazy loud there's no way that I could turn it on in the shower. I did submerge the egg for science and didn't found that any water got into the battery compartment, so the egg does live up to the waterproof claims.

Even if you live on the other side of the house as someone else, I would advise waiting until you're home alone to play with this toy. It's so loud and buzzy that you can for sure hear it through a door or wall, so it's not good for those who live with others.
    • Battery guzzler
    • Multiple settings
    • Not very discreet

Care and Maintenance

Care and maintenance of this toy:
Toss it out the window.

Care and maintenance if you really like this toy for some reason:

It's a fairly easy to care for product in the sense of the design and material. It doesn't pink up lint or gunk at all, so as long as you keep it in a clean environment you don't have to worry about washing it before use and you can get away with just washing it afterwards. I wash this toy with an antibacterial toy cleaner, but soap and water or a toy wipe also work very well.

If you plan on switching users you can wipe this down with a 10% bleach solution to disinfect it. This needs to be done in order to prevent the spread of bacteria and infection.

I keep this in the trash bin, but you can also keep this in a cool, dark place with the rest of your toys. It is compatible with all other materials so you don't have to worry, and similarly it's compatible with all types of lube.
    • Easy to clean
    • Easy to store

Packaging

This toy comes in okay packaging made of cardboard and plastic. There is a transparent window in the front where you can see the remote and the egg, and on the back there is an image of the toy. There aren't any other graphics on the box other than some colorful 'bubbles.'

There are some basic instructions on the box and information about the toy, which is useful because there are no additional instructions inside the box. It is sometimes a bit obvious that the author didn't have the best grasp of the English language, but nothing is confusing to read.

Inside is a white plastic insert with the toy and the batteries. This holds everything in place fairly well. This box is WAS larger than the toy itself so I wouldn't recommend storing your toy in here, especially if you want to use it often. It doesn't look high quality (especially with the broken English) so this may not be the best thing to wrap up and give as a gift.

Here's a picture of the front of the box:
Egg Front

And the back(pardon my webcam making everything blue):
Egg back

And the insert:
Egg package
    • Minimal

Personal comments

Often when you open a toy and find a ton of watch batteries you think "Cool, they have me two rounds worth!" Not this one. See that picture above with all the tiny batteries? It takes all of those just to power the egg and the remote. This is a HUGE turn off for me, especially because it ate all the batteries in a day.

Experience

One thing that makes Eden awesome is that often to clear out mediocre toys that they don't want anymore, they give them away free with orders. This was one of those free promotion items, and I am glad that it was. On the other hand I still may not recommend getting this as a free gift because it ended up costing me $6 in batteries just to finish the review!

If I had payed full price for this egg I would have returned it. It's just such a low quality toy that's no fun for couples play and it's no good to even close your legs around. That on top of the loud, weak, buzzy vibrations and the battery problem? This is the first one star rating I've ever had to give.
This content is the opinion of the submitting contributor and is not endorsed by EdenFantasys.com

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Comments
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  • Contributor: Melan!e
    Wow that is awful! I was going to add this one as a free gift when it was being offered but I waited to place my order and got a cupid vibe instead. I'm glad I had to wait!
    Sorry this one was so terrible for you. That's a lot of watch batteries to waste too!
    Great review though!!
  • Contributor: voenne
    Ugh. It's cute but I'm glad I didn't bother getting this even though it was free. It sounds terrible and the battery situation is just ridiculous.
  • Contributor: Kitka
    Great review hun! Shaki Toys seems to be making some crappy toys. I just drafted up a review for the pocket wand by them and it's terrible as well. Good thing this was free for you.
  • Contributor: FruityCloud
    I got one for free also, I haven't even opened it yet; I've been trying to sell it.
    Doubt anyone will buy it though, but if someone does, I'm so glad I didn't open it first! Thanks! :]
  • Contributor: PeaceToTheMiddleEast
    Sorry to hear you did not like this. Great review thanks for sharing!
  • Contributor: Various
    I was so mad that I forgot to add this with my order when it was available as a free gift.
    ...and now after reading your review I'm not mad at all. It sounds horrible. Thanks for sharing.
  • Contributor: unfulfilled
    I have this, but haven't had a chance to try it out yet. I was amazed at how many batteries it took, stinks to know that it's a battery guzzler.
  • Contributor: TheSinDoll
    OMG at the batteries and at how fast it at them. That really sucks. Thanks for sharing. I'll be sure to keep clear of this one!
  • Contributor: bayosgirl
    thank you for the review! Sorry it was such a disappointment.
  • Contributor: GONE!
    Oh wow, I'm glad you shared this info. Thank you so much. That totally sucks about the batteries!
  • Contributor: Melan!e
    I just noticed that this review is on the wrong product page. This one is actually the remote controlled egg and your review is for the small remote controlled egg. Don't know if there's anything you can do about it but you're review is still very handy.
  • Contributor: Ryuson
    The problem is that this product page is the one that is shown when I go to my order, and the product page that was brought up when I went to select my free gift. I didn't really know what to do, but I assumed that I should just write the review on the page that was in my order.
  • Contributor: lovebites
    thanks for the review!
  • Contributor: ginainohio
    thanks for the review
  • Contributor: HarlequinBunnie
    I see you hate them too. Darn Shimmer!
  • Contributor: Faeya
    Thanks for the review! I swear, watch battery toys seem to eat batteries in general. I refuse to buy them anymore
  • Contributor: T&L
    Thanks for the informative review!
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