L`amour p.w. pleasure system - sex toy by Cal Exotics - review by pasdechat

While the L’Amour P.W. Pleasure System (henceforth simply “L’Amour balls"), like all vaginal balls, are meant to be used in a very specific way, the benefits of using them are seemingly endless; in women, toned PC muscles can mean less difficult childbirths, fewer problems with incontinence and pelvic prolapse later in life, and yes, easier and stronger orgasms.

My interest in the L’Amour balls stemmed from two things: a desire to have a G-spot orgasm—a more sensitive G-spot is yet another rumored benefit of Kegel exercises—and pure curiosity. So far, I haven’t noticed much difference in terms of G-spot stimulation—it still feels good, but not enough to push me over the edge all by itself. Then again, I’ve only had the balls for around a week and a half, so I wouldn’t expect to see a change yet anyway. I can report, though, that the movement of the vaginal balls fulfills its main purpose by reminding me to do Kegels, and since I’m nothing if not forgetful, I’d say that’s pretty good.

The L’Amour balls are made of plastic and silicone and as such are odorless, hypoallergenic, latex-free, and phthalate-free. The balls themselves are rigid; they are made of ABS plastic and feature a decorative “seam” that runs around them lengthwise. Other reviewers have mentioned that they find these seams either uncomfortable or difficult to clean, but I haven’t had either of those problems. If you’re very sensitive to texture, though, I’d imagine that the ridges on these balls could make them a bit irritating. Also, the fact that the balls aren’t pure silicone means that they can’t be sterilized by boiling or bleaching, which might have been nice.

Seam(s) on side of ball

On the other hand, the fact that the cord IS made out of silicone is a source of considerable annoyance to me. For no reason in particular, I expected the cord between the two balls to be very rigid, and it’s not—it’s really, really not. Specifically, the cord (and therefore balls) flop around when you’re trying to insert them. It is, I imagine, a little like trying to shove an enormous, squirmy tadpole up your vagina (apologies for the gross visual).

Nevertheless, there’s a lot I like about the L’Amour balls, so if this were the only issue with the cord, I would be rating them 5 stars. HOWEVER, the retrieval cord is extremely stretchy. I don’t understand the logic of making a cord you’re supposed to be able to tug on out of material that will just expand. In fact, I have to tug so hard on the damn thing that there’s already a tear in the silicone, because when it can’t stretch anymore it doesn’t pull the balls out—it just rips. It’s not a fatal flaw; I can get the balls out without the cord just by pushing with my PC muscles. I can’t help but wonder about women with very weak PC muscles, though. I guess they can pull the balls out with their fingers, but I bet the plastic gets pretty slippery. It just seems like such a stupid, easily avoided flaw in an otherwise quality product.

I admit that when I opened the package and actually saw the size of these Kegel balls in person, I balked. I can handle a dildo that’s 1 1/2” in diameter, but the thought of inserting these into my un-aroused vagina and then just leaving them there seemed laughable. But it wasn’t that bad, although I'd still hesitate to recommend the balls to someone new to penetration; the first ball caused me a little bit of discomfort when I was inserting it, but nothing serious. The balls also don’t feel particularly heavy to me—the entire thing weighs about 2 1/4 oz—but I don’t have much to compare them to. I do, however, find that the balls can cause, well, not pain exactly, but some unpleasantness; specifically, they sometimes make me feel like I need to pee, and not in the pleasurable G-spot sort of way. This only happens occasionally, though—usually just when inserting or removing them.

The design, as I mentioned in the “Materials” section, leaves something to be desired. A firmer, thicker silicone cord would have been appreciated. The cord could also be a bit shorter – the entire set is 8” long, so there’s a good 3” or more left hanging when the balls are fully inserted, and it’s really not necessary.

Length compared to (obviously) my hand

One final thing about the design: The color in the product photos is misleading. To my eyes, at least, there is just no way this product is blue. Bluish purple, yes—I’d say a kind of periwinkle. But the shade is so different than the baby blue you see in the product photos that at first I thought I’d been sent the wrong color. Alas, a close examination of other people’s photos led me to conclude that the ACTUAL purple L’Amour balls are a redder purple. Plus, mine came in the box with blue writing. They’re still pretty, of course, but I had been so excited to see a Cal Exotics product that wasn’t pink or purple that I was disappointed by the way they look in person. And also baffled. I assume that most of the discrepancies between product photos and real life products can be chalked up to the manufacturer wanting to make the product look as appealing as possible, which inevitably raises the question: If Cal Exotics thinks consumers will be drawn to blue toys, then why didn’t they, you know, make the product itself blue? It’s not a question of quality, so it’s not likely they’re just skimping out...

Other than the cord, my experience with these balls has mostly been positive. Unlike some users, I did not feel my vaginal walls “naturally” contracting to hold the L’Amour balls in. I doubt this has anything to do with the quality of the balls, though; based on my experiences with other toys, I think my vagina is just unusually vise-like. I can definitely tell when they’re inserted, though, and that alone reminds me to practice squeezing my muscles around them. I can’t say that I’ve noticed more “resistance” than I do when I do Kegels without an exerciser, but I assume I’m working harder.

Now, what you’ve all been waiting for—how the L’Amour balls feel. The answer is, pleasant, which may not sound like much, but is actually plenty for Kegel balls. Unless you have the most sensitive G-spot on the planet, these balls will not give you an orgasm, but they’re not meant to; they’re meant to give your PC muscles a workout and provide a little extra sensation along the way, and they do just that.

I can honestly say that the sensation these balls provide is like nothing I’ve ever experienced. If you’ve never used Kegel balls, the closest comparison would probably be a very low-key internal vibrator, but it’s not exactly the same. Basically, it feels like something is jiggling, which I suppose it is. Personally, I feel the movements more on the back wall of my vagina and around the entrance (i.e. not my G-spot), but it’s still a fun feeling. Plus, the sensation differs ever so slightly depending on how you move. I don’t always feel them when I’m walking, but I usually do—particularly when I’m walking quickly. Shifting your weight to one side quickly makes the balls bounce more noticeably. Going up and down stairs is very fun. I also decided, just for kicks, to give these balls a whirl while doing some dance movements. Jumping was (predictably) very pleasant. Turning was weirdly disappointing—the balls seemed stationary while I was spinning, and only moved when I “landed.” Another cool thing—if I clench my PC muscles really hard while sitting down, the balls clink against each other.

As I mentioned earlier, the L’Amour balls cannot be sterilized. Depending on how neurotic you are (and considering how neurotic I am, I say that with love), you may or may not worry about gunk getting stuck in the seams between the silicone and plastic. Personally, I’ve been too preoccupied by the thought of stuff getting into that tear in the cord to be very concerned about this. You can rinse them in either soap and water or toy cleaner; I wash mine with soap and water, and then go over them with an antibiotic wipe just to be safe.

I think the balls are relatively discreet, as sex toys go. They’re not very big, first of all, so you can easily tuck them away in the drawer. And speaking only for myself, I would not have had a clue what they were for back before I started using sex toys. Do be careful to keep them away from silicone lubes and toys, though, since these do have some silicone that could potentially degrade. Also, while I can’t speak from experience, I would STRONGLY suggest that any women with young children keep these safely out of reach, because I have a feeling that I would have found these absolutely fascinating as a little kid, what with all the rolling and shaking and noise (incidentally, while these make a bit of noise when you hold them in your hand, they’re silent once they’re inside your body).

The packaging of the L’Amour balls is not nearly as egregious as some of what Cal Exotics comes out with. They come in a small, clear plastic package with a lot of writing touting the toy’s many advantages—sophisticated (definitely), made of silicone (yes, though not entirely), and seamless (well...not exactly). It’s not the prettiest or most informative packaging, but it’s respectable.

Front of package