This Made Me Scream . . .

This is a toy from my wife's discard pile. She walked out of the bedroom, handed it to me, and said, "Here, I didn't like this." I wasn't exactly sure what I was going to do with it, so I put it on the nightstand and left it there. This afternoon I picked it up, looked at it, turned it on, and figured that the baby was asleep and my wife was working, so what the heck, I'd go play with it. My goal was perineal stimulation while masturbating, which is my favorite. I started that way, but pretty quickly I was so turned on that I ran into the bathroom, grabbed a condom, and put the first inch or so past my anus. I started screaming, and very quickly there were about four inches inside me. I didn't stop groaning and screaming until I had an enormous orgasm. For the record, I do not scream, do not make noise, and very rarely play with anything involving anal insertion. It must be the Catholic in me ...

The vibrator is made of hard plastic and is very smooth. The texture changes slightly at the end, which is made of a different plastic. The end is clear and the vibrating mechanism is visible, which is little more than a novelty given that it will likely be covered up during use. The material is easy to clean, but fluids could get stuck around the dial at the end. I used a condom just to make cleanup easy, and I did notice that the lubricant on the condom left an oily-looking residue on the clear part, even after repeated washings. Washing is with a damp or damp-and-soapy cloth only because the toy is not waterproof.

This is a very long vibrator (about nine inches) that is quite thin for most of the length. The control dial is at the very end, which then tapers to a very thin shaft. The shaft rapidly gets bigger toward the bulbous end, which ends up being nearly three inches in diameter. The end is asymmetrical and has a bit of a beaked shape. The toy is powered by three AAA batteries and provides very strong vibrations, along with very loud noise. The beaked shape turned it into a magic toy when run around my anal sphincter, and it was even more magical when rotated until it was cupped around my prostate. That was when I really started groaning and then screaming. There is nothing discreet about this toy, especially with the clear plastic end showing the vibrator guts.

The vibrations are controlled by a dial on the very end of the toy. The wheel is small and not particularly easy to use with lubed fingers. The range of vibration is large, and the highest settings really pack a punch. The lowest settings almost seem stronger, however, because of the type of mechanism.

This toy is easy to clean and can be wiped down. Care should be taken because the toy is not waterproof and because the dial may be difficult to get totally clean. Because it is hard plastic, it does not get sticky or attract hair or lint, so it can pretty much be thrown into the drawer of the nightstand.

I should note that what I did with this toy should be repeated only with due care. There is no end on this toy to keep it from being "lost" if it is inserted too far. That said, most people are not going to have the problem of inserting a hard plastic rod nine inches into their rectum. Still, if this will be a concern, tie a string around the end (which could also serve to help keep a condom on it as condom loss is a more likely problem). The bigger safety issue is that this toy is so long and so hard that it could easily tear a rectum or a vagina. Due care should be used when rolling about with this toy partially inserted (severe bruising may result, not that I would know from my own overeager play, um ... um ...).

I loved this toy. I have to be in a certain mood to play with an insertable, and it does not happen very often, largely because I hate using lube and being sticky. I needed no lube other than what was on a condom for this toy, which was a major plus.