Bottle rockets Saturn - discreet massager by Evolved Novelties - review by Nyx

Pow, Straight to the Moon!

I'm in love with this little guy. From its adorable packaging and neat pocket size to its powerful vibrations and easily adjustable settings, there's nothing I don't adore. It's discreet, unintimidating, and perfect for first-timers, and its fabulous packaging makes it an awesome gift.
Great toy for beginners, adorable packaging, fabulous vibration settings, and super-easy care.
It's shorter than many toy users might want.
Rating by reviewer:
extremely useful review


Don't let this vibe's diminutive size fool you: it's just as tough as its bigger, flashier cousins. Though it may be too short for internal use for more experienced toy users, it's a perfect first-time toy for penetration. Small enough to use externally during couple's play, quiet enough to use behind closed doors in a full house, and waterproof for shower play—its versatility, for being such an unassuming little toy, is pretty impressive.
  • Who / How / What
    [ ? ]
    Who might this product be best for? How is it best used? What are the best circumstances or situations for using this product?
    • Couples
    • Everyone
    • Solo
  • Where
    [ ? ]
    Where / what types of places can this product be used?
    • Anywhere
    • In a full house
    • Tub/shower/pool
  • Features
    [ ? ]
    What kind of features does this product offer?
    • Cute packaging
    • Travel friendly
  • Body / part areas
    [ ? ]
    What areas on the body can this product be used / what areas does it stimulate best?
    • All over body
    • Clitoris

Material / Texture

I normally steer clear of toys made of hard plastic, but I decided to take a chance on this one, and I wasn't disappointed. The texture is velvety smooth, not squeaky hard, and the weight of the toy is perfect in your hand.

I find the texture of the plastic to be the perfect happy medium between the softer, more rubbery toys that can sometimes irritate without enough lube and the harder polished plastic toys that can sometimes stick unpleasantly.
    • No odor
    • Ribbed
    • Rigid

Design / Shape / Size

I think the Bottle Rocket Saturn is absolutely adorable. I know I'm not alone in this, but I often find a toy's design to be a big part of the turn-on—or turn-off, sometimes. When toys are ugly, even if they technically do the job, I find them kind of ... icky. But this is cute, simple, of a perfect size and weight to travel with, and discreet. I went with the purple color, and it's super cute.

It's lightly contoured to fit perfectly with insertion, and its light ribs are noticeable enough to be pleasurable but not so pronounced that they risk being uncomfortable. The base is tiny, keeping the whole toy small enough to tuck into your handbag but shaped so that you can hold onto it without much difficulty when using the toy internally.

It's a perfect size for beginners to clitoral stimulation or for beginners to penetration (like me). Due to its short size, it might be somewhat of a disappointment for users used to bigger, longer toys, but it would definitely still do the job of clitoral stimulation. It's nice and small, so it's easy to use in conjunction with other toys.
    • Beginner
    • Cute
    • Discreet look/design

Functions / Performance / Controls

The vibrations travel the whole length of the Bottle Rocket Saturn, which I love. When using it internally, I find the vibrations at the tip to be much more satisfying than other toys whose vibrations emanate from the base and may not make it that far down the shaft of the vibe.

The strength of the vibrations is controlled by a single button on the base of the toy, which makes it extremely easy to use. This toy has three levels of steady vibes: low, medium, and high. The high setting is pretty intense—I find the medium to be the best, personally.

I've only taken it into the shower with me once, but it performed beautifully. Plus, it was tremendous fun.
    • Easy to use
    • Multiple settings
    • Strong patterns

Care and Maintenance

This is one of the most easy-to-clean toys I've owned. I've usually gotten toys of a stickier, more porous material like jelly or Trueskin, so plastic is new to me—and wow, is it ever easy! Toy cleaner or soap and water, they both work like a charm.

I actually store this one in its original bottle packaging because it's such a clever design, and it seals out any dust or lint that the plastic might attract.
    • Easy to clean
    • Easy to store


For once, the packaging is just as much fun as the toy. It's such a turnoff to get toys in packaging with naked porn stars on it, curly pink lettering about "long-lasting delight," and so forth. This one comes packaged neatly in a little plastic bottle that you could feel pretty good about leaving out on your nightstand. The base of the bottle unscrews, making it highly reusable.
    • Discreet looking packaging
    • Good for storage
    • Would make a nice gift


I bought this vibe as an exploration into the realm of penetration. As a virgin, I find most toys to be too big to be pleasurable, so I was looking for something small and good for beginners. I struggled to find a toy that was good for beginners to internal use but strong enough to satisfy someone who's experienced with external vibes.

This little guy was definitely a winner: no pain or discomfort involved whatsoever and a variety of settings that'll keep me interested for a long time to come. Part of me does wish it were a little longer, but for a first time, it really does do the trick.
    • Beginner
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Do you like this review?
  • newfoundlust
    Nice review. Keep up the good work.
  • Linga
    Great review! It's a cute little toy! Bit small and I think plain for my liking but adorable
  • ichwillwaffels
    good review
  • Miss Anonymous
    Thanks for the review!
  • kelaaa33wish
    What size is the toy? Thanks for the review.
  • Ghost
    Looks cute.
  • Pink Jewel
    Good review
  • Ninja Bunny
    Thank you =]
  • Cherrylane
    Great review! thanks!
  • Iron Man
    Classy packaging is always nice. Thanks!
  • noelleish
    thanks for the review!
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