Official Friday The 13th Parody by Zero Tolerance - review by Gary

The DVD started out with a young blonde girl named Susie (Sara Sloane) who was on her way to the Crystal Lake Nudist Camp. Her first stop was at a small bar where the bartender (played by Tabitha Stevens) tells her the legend of some guy who drowned in the lake because he had a large penis. She also said that “They say that he’s some kind of monster, with flesh eating jizz". Yes, really.

Susie then finds the camp, everyone keeps joking about orgies, and then the first sex scene happens with Courtney Cummz and Mr. Pete, who play a couple who were watching Susie come into camp though their cabin window and decide to have sex (the girl was already naked). The scene is a really basic, low intensity fem-dom scenario, but it was interesting enough and the sex was pretty good. The scene ends with a man / monster in a hockey mask coming into the cabin, just after the couple finished having sex, and he ejaculates his ‘flesh eating jizz’ all over them. There is a lot of it!

Next up, Susie is running around through the woods, finds the lake, and narrowly avoids crossing paths with the monster. Then, all of a sudden, it’s dark and Asa Akira and Rocco Reed are in a cabin, ramping up to having some sex. This scene is a lot more straight forward and romantic than the first. Once the couple are done getting it on, Asa leaves to go take a bath and Rocco lies down.

Up until this point, I was only semi-enjoying the movie, but what happened next made me a fan! They recreated one of my favorite kill scenes from the first Friday the 13th; the scene where Jason puts an arrow through Kevin Bacon’s throat. This was awesome! So yeah, an arrow comes up through Rocco's throat and kills him. Yes! Then it clips to Asa getting a bath and the monster is standing behind her masturbating (and he does have a very abnormally large cock), and then you hear screaming as scene cuts.

Next are a series of storyline shots: a few kids are playing strip-opoly, the monster creeping through a dark corridor, Susie creepy around with a flashlight saying “hello” over and over, and then runs into a guy carrying an inflatable doll around with him (Kris Slater). The guy then begins talking about the legend of the monster, and how it all begin with a sex party. We then go back in time to a sex scene from that fateful night. Kagney Linn Karter and Carlo Carrera are in a basement at some party. They never met before, but Kagney talks Carlos into having sex, even though he warned her that his dick gets really big after sex. So they get it on, he finishes and grows, she starts screaming in terror, and then he becomes so upset he runs into the lake and drowns as he is pulled down by his enormous penis.

Flash back to the hallway where inflatable doll guy is telling Susie the story. After finishing the story, the guy assures Susie that it’s only a story. Next to skip back to the strip-opoly game with Brooke Lee Adams, Brooklyn Lee, and Mark Wood, where everyone agrees to stop playing and just have sex. The threesome is pretty straight forward for this kind of a scene, the girls are a bit curvier than the others in the movie which is a plus. After a double facial ending, the three are sitting together as the monster walks in, masturbates in front of them, and then shoots flesh eating jizz all over them.

Back to Susie and Inflatable doll guy who are wondering around. They find the monster’s lair, meanwhile the monster creeps up behind them. They end up shutting his penis in the door, and cutting it off with an axe. Then it cuts away to a bedroom where the final sex scene with Susie and the inflatable doll guy (Sara Sloane and Kris Slater) takes place. The have some pretty straight forward sex, the camera shift to show the monster walking down a hallway, and then it cuts to the credits. In my opinion, the ending landed a little flat! I was hoping for the Susie to get it on with the monster, or at least someone should have.

Overall, I really did enjoy this movie. I would have done a few things differently, but I am just happy they made it. It is somewhat of a dream come true that they made a porn out of this movie. For years, I have been talking about how cool it would be if someone did make it, and I have made numerous jokes on the forum about my wife and I wearing hockey masks and wielding machetes on romantic nights.