Put Some Sass(y) In Your Ass

While it can be used anywhere you feel the urge to put it, Sliquid Sassy Booty Formula is, as the name suggests, intended for use as an anal lubricant, for which it works quite nicely. It's water-based and glycerin-free and therefore safe for vaginal use as well, but, unless you like thicker lubes vaginally, I would imagine the viscosity of this product could make that feel unnatural and strange. This review will center on anal, as that is both the aim of the product and my personal use of it.

Like all water-based lubricants, Sassy is safe for use with any toy material, and, being a gel, does a good job of staying in place on said toys. It also, as per usual for water-based lubes, rinses away with water, so attempts at shower sex will be largely futile.

Those of you with sensitive bodies and minds can relax and enjoy this product too, because, according to the label, it is also free of DEA, gluten, glycerol, parabens, PEG, propylene glycol, sorbitol, [sulfates], and is 100% vegan. (Ingredients will make an appearance later on; this isn't really the section for that.)

Sassy is a thick liquid, qualifying amongst lubricants as a gel, and has a viscosity similar to that of light corn syrup (Porn syrup?) if you tip the bottle around and watch it move. It's thick enough that the bottle requires a little squeeze to get the product out. The formula is pretty smooth, but I wouldn't call it creamy, which is in keeping with its labeling as a gel lubricant. There is no greasy or sticky feel. Sassy is slick and provides a good amount of cushion, which is great for anal exploits. As I mentioned in the previous section, it stays in place well and requires some smearing if you want to spread it around.

Straight from the bottle, there is a light, slightly bitter botanical scent to this lube, reminiscent of the smell of "unscented" liquid hand soap. Personally, I find this aroma to be clean and pleasant. Once the product is in use, the scent quickly dissipates into nothing. Despite having that slight smell at first, Sassy carries absolutely no flavor. My initial thought was, "It tastes like water." (I know that might sound silly to many of you, but to those who, like myself, aren't big water-drinkers, I think it will make sense.)

As previously stated in the "Use" section, this lubricant is compatible with all toy materials and does work well for toy play, since it doesn't spread much unless you want it to. As for how "natural" it feels, I can't rightly say, as the rectum does not produce a natural lubricant with which I can compare. Now, onward to the actual product performance.

When rubbed around, Sassy has a tendency to transform into a white foam, but this is inconsequential to its functionality and is only noticeable visually. It does get a little bit stringy after 10 minutes or so of use, and reapplication is necessary. I feel that reapplication is to be expected with both water-based lubricants and anal play, so I don't feel this detracts from the quality of the product. I enjoy the cushioning effect this lubricant has, but I find the eventual stringiness a bit off-putting. It doesn't interfere with the performance of the product; I just think it looks sort of icky.

If you don't like to get up and clean up immediately after play, this lube is a good choice. Required cleanup is naught but a quick wipe-up of any excess product, though most of it will absorb nicely into the skin without leaving any film or residue. If you can't stand not to wash off afterward, rejoice that it won't take long; Sassy rinses away quickly and cleanly. Delving a little bit deeper into the subject of cleanup, no internal flushing will ever be necessary. The rectum always takes care of itself, but even frequent vaginal use won't pose a problem, as water-based formulas do not have the tendency to build up that some silicone-based lubricants do.

Like most Sliquid products, Sassy comes packaged in a recyclable plastic bottle with a rocker/click style lid. This cap makes for clean and easy one-handed use, though, as this is a thick lubricant, you may want to wipe the mouth of it after use so the lube doesn't gum up there and impede product flow when it dries. It takes a pretty good push to click it open, so I wouldn't be concerned about it opening during ground travel unless rough treatment of your bags is anticipated. (At 4.2oz, this product cannot be taken on airlines in its original container.) The bottle is sturdy and requires a fairly firm squeeze to dispense the product, but personally, I prefer that to a flimsier container that potentially carries a risk of giving way and breaking.

The only instructions on the label are "To reactivate, reapply or add water." I think this is sufficient, since anyone who's buying personal lubricants should already have a good idea of what to do with them. Adding water (or saliva) does slick things up again, but it does nothing to reinstate the thickness of the lube. I prefer to just reapply.

This is not a discreet product. While the words "natural lubricating gel" are printed in small letters, the brand name of "sliquid" is in large print and, in my opinion, leaves little question to the nature of the object. Even so, a bottle left sitting out may still have gone unnoticed, if not for the fact that the entire label is a screaming shade of fuchsia that demands attention. You're simply not hiding this one in plain sight. It wants to be seen.

I think the best feature of this product is that it doesn't really have any "special" features. It's a clean, simple, effective product made with body-safe, vegan-friendly ingredients. There are no dyes, flavors, or scents added that might cause a reaction in sensitive individuals, and there are no warming, tingling, or cooling agents that might cause discomfort or damage to delicate rectal tissues. Special features be damned, I say.

As promised in in "Use" section...

Ingredients: purified water, plant cellulose (from cotton), cyamopsis (guar conditioners), potassium sorbate, citric acid

Eden lists polyquat 007 and DMDM hydantoin, which are preservatives, as ingredients, but Sliquid must have tweaked their formula since that product information was added. As you can see, the preservatives listed on my bottle are potassium sorbate and citric acid, which are natural and safer for the body. For the curious, the cotton cellulose and guar are natural thickeners. This product is basically a carefully-crafted jellied water, and you can't get much cleaner and gentler than that.

< rant > I didn't feel this was appropriate to place in the "Packaging" section, but I'd like to take a moment here to complain about the label design. It's really the only thing about this product that I well and truly dislike. The lack of discretion is not what I find off-putting, though I imagine it might bother some others. If I wanted it hidden, I'd hide it. What bothers me is that it's obnoxiously feminine. This is an anal lubricant; I fail to see why the packaging should be specifically geared toward women. Everyone has an anus, and nearly everyone can gain pleasure by playing with it. That said, even if I was a woman, I'd be vaguely offended by this label because of how stereotypical it is. The almost neon pink coloring is visually painful to me, and it has a smattering of "female" symbols layered on top of the Sliquid company lotus logo. Really, Sliquid? The lotus itself wasn't feminine enough? < /rant >