Oscillating massager discontinued
by Advanced response corp.

Ohhh, Dr. Ruth, You Are sooo Riiight

Get the most basic version, buy the fingertip attachment if the version you get does not come with it, and get ready to blast off in a funny German accent: Yaaaaaah, yer orgasm iss important!
Published:
Pros
It makes my wife orgasm reliably, fast, and intensely.
Cons
It is ugly. You have to have AC power. Most of the attachments are useless to us.
Rating by reviewer:
5
extremely useful review

Use

The Eroscillator is intended to help women orgasm, even those who have perhaps had difficulty doing so before. It is specifically intended to be used on and around the clitoris. Let's be clear: it does what it is supposed to do and does it very well. It is a strange-looking critter; in fact, it is just butt ugly. It is never going to win any contests on form or being pretty. It, frankly, looks more like something that we would find in our workshop toolbox. However, it does its job, and it does it very well.
  • Who / How / What
    [ ? ]
    Who might this product be best for? How is it best used? What are the best circumstances or situations for using this product?
    • Couples
    • Sensory play
    • Solo
  • Where
    [ ? ]
    Where / what types of places can this product be used?
    • Campus/roommate living
    • On a bed only
  • Features
    [ ? ]
    What kind of features does this product offer?
    • Travel friendly
  • Body / part areas
    [ ? ]
    What areas on the body can this product be used / what areas does it stimulate best?
    • Anal
    • Clitoris
    • Nipples

Material / Texture

There is one color choice and one color choice only: light brown. Why? We do not know; it just is. The entire Eroscillator is just an ugly brown. The entire unit is made of a hard, phthalates-free plastic. There is no smell to the unit, and it comes with a very long AC cable so that you can easily move it around you on the bed while you play.

There are two parts to the Eroscillator. The first is the shaft. It is made of a hard plastic. The shaft has the motor inside it, has the dial to change the speed of the oscillator (three settings of slow, medium, and fast), and has the plug that goes into your wall outlet. The shaft is not intended to be used for anything except grasping and turning the dial to adjust the speed.

The second part is what we will refer to as the attachments. Depending on the model that you buy, there are different attachments that come with it. The various attachments plug into the shaft, and when the Eroscillator is turned on, they begin to oscillate, not vibrate. All of the attachments are made of a hard plastic as well, with two exceptions. The first one is the soft finger attachment. Most of this attachment is the usual hard plastic. However, on the tip is a soft, phthalate-free tip that simulates a human fingertip. Think of your fingertip being able to go exactly where you want it at the pressure you want it and then to oscillate (not vibrate) at up to 7200 times per minute! Holy crap, Batgirl! The second exception is what is called the French Legionnaire's Mustache. It is the same hard plastic, but then on each side it has long bristles that look sort of like a mustache. Every other attachment is some hard plastic variation of cup, bumps, and balls.
    • No odor
    • Not porous at all
    • Rigid

Design / Shape / Size

Design, shape, and size . . . What design? It is like the world's biggest screwdriver! Shape, likewise! Size, it is big! There is no way to hide what this is. Anyone who sees it out is going to either think it's a tool or a sex toy or some huge electric toothbrush. As for being discreet and okay for travel, we would not recommend carrying it onto a plane in carry-on luggage. It can be put into an overnight bag or suitcase, however, for travel. Just remember that it uses wall-outlet AC power, so it cannot be used for overnight camping trips or other places with no AC power (at least without a generator!). It is, however, comfortable to hold; it is so much lighter than, say, a Hitachi Wand; and it puts the chosen tip where you want it, whether that is your labia, clitoris, anus exterior (ONLY), or nipples.
    • Ergonomic
    • Futuristic
    • Partner play

Functions / Performance / Controls

There are four simple decisions, and only four, that you really need to make to use this butt-ugly piece of orgasm heaven: one, which attachment to put on it; two, where to apply the pressure; three, how hard to apply the pressure; and four, which of the three simple speeds do you want to use. Fortunately, other than the attachment decision, these are all instantly interchangeable. There are three power levels, low/medium/high, in addition to off. You get those by pushing a large switch on the shaft with your thumb or finger. You can freely go in either direction, up or down. The highest speed, as mentioned above, is about 7200 oscillations per minute. The lowest is around 3000 and the middle about 5500 (or at least that is what Eroscillator says; we can't count that fast!). The neat thing about the design of the Eroscillator is that the vibrations/oscillations are in the tip, not in the body of the shaft that you hold. Therefore, the sensations are where you want them, not being diffused all throughout the body of the toy. This also makes it suitable for folks with arthritis, Carpal Tunnel, or other problems with their hands. The Eroscillator is AC power supplied out of your wall outlet. Therefore, it CANNOT be used in water. While the advertising says this is very quiet, we have not found that it is especially so. It does tend to be a bit louder than some of our other toys, especially when it is not being applied to the body. Once the tip is applied to the body, it quiets down some, but it is NOT silent.
    • Easy to use
    • Long lasting power
    • Powerful

Care and Maintenance

Care is simple. Plug in the attachment head you want to use and apply the desired amount of lubricant. Play until you are ready to stop. Unplug the attachment head. Wash the attachment; there is no need to wash the shaft. Put it away until you are ready to play again. We keep ours plugged in to a multi-outlet strip I put into Mrs. Lust's bedside table drawer along with her other plug-in/rechargeable toys, so they are ready when we are.
    • Easy to clean
    • Easy to store

Packaging

The Eroscillator comes in a very nice box, but it is clear what it is. The instructions are very detailed, more detailed than most. They describe how each of the attachment heads might be used and describe how to play with the toy. The package cannot be used for gifts/storage.
    • Not discreet
    • Very informative

Personal comments

So now to the good stuff. We have already described that this thing is weird looking and ugly as all get-out. So be it. This thing is phenomenal, especially the soft fingertip attachment. We have tried all the others, and they do nothing for my wife, other than the mustache. All the other attachments are just too hard, as Mrs. Lust likes smooth, direct vibrations to her button to send her into orbit. Here is how our first use went: I set the toy up and gave the directions to Mrs. Lust to read as she finds reading about things very arousing. As she read, I plugged in the soft fingertip and put the Eroscillator on low. I began lightly, very lightly, running the fingertip around her outer labial lips. Her comment was something to the effect of "Wow, that feels great." After about a minute of that, I switched to running the tip around her inner labia. Her comment was something like "Oh, my lord!" After about another minute or two, I then lightly touched her clitoral head. Well, I am not sure what she said then because it was unintelligible. I think it was something like "mMMMMMMMMMMMMMOohhhhOHHHOHHH . . . AAAAHHHH!"

As she started to orgasm, I simply left the fingertip attachment on her clitoris and bumped up the power to level two. That is when Mrs. Lust began to buck, twist, kick, and scream. It is a very good thing the kids were out of the house. About five minutes later, when she could finally speak again, she thanked me sincerely. The Eroscillator works to get her to orgasm faster than any other toy we own.

Experience

As noted above, the fingertip attachment is the be-all and end-all for us, other than the mustache. It is fun to use the mustache to tickle inner thighs, nipples, etc. All the other attachments are just "meh" to us.

Since our first use, we have experimented with the Eroscillator on various other places. It is also fun to use the fingertip on those areas, as well as the exterior of the anus. However, do NOT attempt to use this toy in the rectum, as the tip will come off and get stuck inside. We have also tried using the Eroscillator inside the vagina as a G-spot toy, but it does nothing for Mrs. Lust. It looks and feels a bit too much like a medical device. We have used it on my penis, testicles, and perineum. It feels great there as well.

We have found that the Eroscillator is the toy that brings her to orgasm the fastest of any toy and that the orgasms last a long time, especially if I am using it on her as I will tease with both the lowest power and not take it off of her as she starts to cum. Then, as she gets into full orgasm, I bump up the power first to medium and then, fifteen to twenty seconds later, to top speed.
Follow-up commentary
The Eroscillator still gets used regularly and continues to do what it was designed to do, create orgasms for my wife. We still love the finger attachment better than anything else.
This content is the opinion of the submitting contributor and is not endorsed by EdenFantasys.com

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This review was edited by
  • Selective Sensualist Contributor: Selective Sensualist
  • Rank:
    6 / 10
  • Edited reviews: 540
Comments
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  • Contributor: Destri
    wow. It is so ugly I never would have thought it could be so enjoyable. Great review, thanks.
  • Contributor: Ms. Spice
    lol it's so ugly, but i've read so many great reviews about it. thanks so much
  • Contributor: newfoundlust
    Thanks to Destri and Ms. Spice for reading, and to Selective Sensualist for the editing.
  • Contributor: Linga
    Awesome review! I really really really want this toy but I've been putting it off because I've never used anything like it. I really need to try it out, I only wish I could try something cheaper that does the same kinda thing.
  • Contributor: Redboxbaby
    I am glad you enjoyed this. I have a hard time paying $139 for a plastic toy, but damn, now I am intrigued. It is truly hideous! You'd think they could make it look halfway decent for the price.
  • Contributor: newfoundlust
    Thanks for reading Lingaloo and Redbox.
  • Contributor: M121212
    I very much want to try this out. Yea I've heard a lot of people say this toy is ugly. I honestly don't find it to be ugly. It reminds me of old fashioned machinery which is a aesthetic I quite like. *shrugs* Definitely sounds like it works for people though. This may make its way onto my next order!
  • Contributor: newfoundlust
    Thanks for reading Miss Voluptuous. We think you will definitely find it works.
  • Contributor: The Curious Couple
    Thanks for sharing!
  • Contributor: newfoundlust
    Thanks for reading, CC.
  • Contributor: EJ
    This was one of our first vibrators, and it's still our favorite. We bought it back when they were still made in black (ten years ago, maybe). The soft finger attachment is my favorite too, though I have to admit, the Golden Spoon attachment that I ordered just a couple weeks ago isn't bad either. I was surprised to find it to be made of a much softer material than the two original attachments that came with our black Eroscillator. It's always good to find reviewers that like the same toys that we do; it makes toy shopping a lot easier (and less expensive). Thanks for the review.
  • Contributor: newfoundlust
    EJ, thanks for reading it. Glad it is a good toy for you as well, especially given the cost! Cheers.
  • Contributor: sweet seduction
    Thanks for the great review!
  • Contributor: newfoundlust
    Thanks for taking the time to read it seduction.
  • Contributor: unfulfilled
    I WANT this
  • Contributor: pinkzombie
    Nice review!
  • Contributor: Love Perpetua
    Nice review! I also love love LOVE the Eroscillator but hate the color! @EJ I didn't even know they used to make a black version. I wish they'd bring that back. I wonder why they switched to copper.
  • Contributor: cheesewizz
    nice review
  • Contributor: Gracie
    Nice review! I can't decide about this toy. Thanks for all the info!
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