Happy penis - lubricant by Classic Erotica - review by This Is For The Birds

Since When Does EF Sell Toothpaste?

While I am a huge fan of mint, this was just not something that was great for me. It's a wonderful lube with a great smell, however, the oral part of this lube has to go. The mint is something that if it was sold in a tube you could pass it off as toothpaste.
Smells good
Easy to clean up
Cool bottle
Mint tastes like toothpaste
Rating by reviewer:
extremely useful review
Use: Happy Penis is an edible, water-based lube. It's made for adding a little flavor to your oral pleasure with a great taste and a great smell. While it smells awesome, the taste on the other hand isn't so great. I will get more into that in a minute though. The ingredients are as follows: Water, Glycerin, Cetyl Alcohol, Stearyl Alcohol, Xanthan Gum, Mineral Oil, Steareth-21, Carbomer, Flavor, Triethanolamine, Methylparaben, Propylparaben, Sorbic Acid, Disodium EDTA, Sodium Saccharin, CHERRY also contains: Red 40 (CL 16035), Red 33 (CL 17200); MINT also contains: Blue 1 (CL42090), Yellow 5 (CL19140); PINA COLADA also contains: Yellow 5 (CL19140), Orange 4 (CL15510).

Texture/Consistency/Thickness: Happy Penis is water-based lube, but by the thickness of it you would never know. It is a very thick lube, which is nice in a way because it doesn't run all over the place when using it, but some may find it too thick.

I felt the texture of it to be very nice, for the short time period that I used it (you'll find out why in a minute). Even though some of the other reviews said it was chalky, I found it to be a smooth texture.
Since this lube is more on the thicker side, it doesn't just slide out of the twist top. It is something that needs a good amount of squeeze pressure to come out of the bottle. With that being said, some may find it somewhat of a mess to use since you will more than likely have to apply it to your hand first and then rub it on the penis. If you're using this on a female partner, it may be a little easier since they will be laying down and have a bigger area to shoot for to apply the lube to.

Taste/Aroma: This is where the problem comes in for Happy Penis and I. I am a big fan of mint, so I figured I would try out the mint flavor. When I ordered, mint and piña colada were my only two options, and I am not a piña colada fan. However, as much as I tried to like this, due to it being mint, I just couldn't. It tasted like my toothpaste. Mix the flavor with the thickness of it and it could pass as toothpaste if it were sold in a tube. This is the reason I did not use it very long; I could not get over how horrible it tasted and I was starting to gag.

On another note, the smell of it was great. It smelled like mint, and like I said, I'm a big fan of mint, so I could handle the smell. My husband isn't a fan of smell goods, so he on the other hand didn't like it. He said it was a very strong smell. Me being used to it, I didn't think it was all that strong.

Performance: I'm not sure how well I can touch on this subject since I did not use it for long. Happy Penis is supposed to help with oral sex by adding flavor and smell. While they nailed the smell part, they failed the taste part, so it didn't help at all. I would of rather given him a blow job "plain." In my opinion, if this was just a normal lube with an added aroma, it would be more productive. We found it to be an excellent lube while I finished him off with my hand, and it was an easy cleanup afterwards. There was no sticky or slimy residue left behind, and it wiped off very easily with just a towel.

Packaging: Happy Penis comes in a pretty straightforward bottle. The bottle could be very travel friendly as long as it is packaged well. Since the name of this lube is Happy Penis, there is a picture of a penis smiling on the front. To use the lube, you just twist the cap, turn the bottle upside down, and squeeze. I do not think that this bottle would be a leaking hazard unless the cap twisted in your suitcase, which I find that it would not be easy to do.
This content is the opinion of the submitting contributor and is not endorsed by EdenFantasys.com
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My Happy penis tags
  • Who / How / What
    [ ? ]
    Who might this product be best for? How is it best used? What are the best circumstances or situations for using this product?
    • Couples
    • Everyone
    • Foreplay
  • Where
    [ ? ]
    Where / what types of places can this product be used?
    • Anywhere
  • Features
    [ ? ]
    What kind of features does this product offer?
    • Travel friendly
  • Body / part areas
    [ ? ]
    What areas on the body can this product be used / what areas does it stimulate best?
    • Oral
This review was edited by
  • VeganChick (is Gone) VeganChick (is Gone)
  • Rank:
  • Edited reviews: 115
Do you like this review?
  • married with children
    sorry this did not work out better for you. thanks for sharing.
  • Zombirella
    I got the banana. I absolutely hated this stuff. The texture just...ugh.
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