Common Reasons You're Not Reaching Climax
Orgasming for men is generally pretty straight forward, but for many women, it’s a whole different ball game. The good news is that the majority of women can orgasm - if they eliminate the factors that bothering their climax. If you're one of the many women who's struggling, we’ve rounded up 5 surprising reasons you might not be able to go to the finish line.
1There's A Drought In The Land
Lubricant makes everyone's hot bits more sensitive to erotic touch, so the philosophy wetter is better generally applies. Using a good lube enhances skin to skin or skin to toy contact, and decreases the amount of friction, giving a smooth glide. All women get wet at different rates and to different degrees, sometimes a little outside help is needed, and that's perfectly ok.
Water-based lube is safe to use with condoms and toys. It will not stain your sheets, and makes for easy cleanup.
Silicone is hypoallergenic and typically lasts longer, so it is great for shower sex, and safe to use with condoms.
Oil-based lube is great for those who don't want to reapply mid-session, it lasts the longest of all 3 base varieties.
To take things up a notch for even more stimulating sensations, consider switching to lube with warming or cooling effects, or enhanced clit arousal gel. For more info on choosing the perfect lube for your next steamy session, slip into this guide to lubricants.
Ultra heat is an enhancing lube that gets you hot and starts the arousal process... For her, it causes almost immediate self-lubrication.
2You Aren't Tensing Your Muscles
Ladies who have difficulty landing the big "O" are often told to "try to relax," but sometimes the opposite is true.
Muscle tension is essential for an orgasm. The majority of women incorporate leg, abdominal, and butt tension when arousal is building, and flexing these muscles increases sensitivity and lubrication, which are building blocks to a woman's orgasm. By contracting your lower pelvic muscles (AKA Kegel muscles), you increase blood flow to the walls of your vagina and pelvic floor.
You can elongate and strengthen your pelvic floor muscles with backbends, squats, and stretches or work them out with Kegel Balls.
They come in a variety of options, and many include additional fun features like vibrations, various textures or materials, and even remote controls to add fun and diversity to your workout. Check out these tips for choosing the perfect Kegel exerciser.
If you want a great workout and a sweat-inducing, body shaking, orgasm at the same time than the Quiver is exactly what you have been looking for.
3There's A Need For More Gentle Approach
It's a common misconception that harder and faster equals better. But... orgasms are directly connected to a women's nervous system and we are wired differently. A softer approach allows a gentle buildup that lends itself to mind-blowing results. Since your clit is so sensitive to physical touch it's fairly common for girls to find on-the-spot vibration irritating, numbing, or just too concentrated to bring the pleasure they are seeking.
Touchless clit stimulators are a great alternative. These little wonders work so well because they are not actually coming into contact with the clitoris. This revolutionary technology uses a combination of pulsations and soft air flow to create a gentle pulling sensation that imitates the amazing motions of your partner's tongue gently caressing your sensitive clitoris into the heights of ecstasy. They can also mimic the feeling of your lover's mouth on your nipples.
It is a completely different feeling from a traditional toy and the closest resemblance to oral sex I have found from an electronic product.
As if that weren't enough many have fun features like escalating intensity levels, bunny ears for added tingles or an attached vibrator to involve your G-spot in the action. They are perfect for solo play or in combination with a partner so you can perfectly design your climax.
4Your Vanilla Needs Some Spice
When you've been with your partner for a while, it's pretty easy to get comfortable and find your sex life has become a boring routine. Say NO! to boring sex! Forget doing things in the same order and the same positions. You need a totally new erotic experience - so, how about play with remote-controlled vibrators? They are the perfect way to breathe some life back into your bedroom routine.
Remote-controlled sex toys aren't limited to bullet vibes, either. There
is a vast assortment of remote-controlled G-spot vibes, wearable panty
vibrators, Kegel toys, and butt plugs on the market, too.
Some are designed to be used up close and personal,
without needing to stop mid romp to change the intensity of the buzz,
and some of these toys are designed to be used long-distance, so your
partner can make you orgasm from across town or across the country.
Whether you find the surrender of control tantalizing or want to indulge in some secret sexy public play, a remote-controlled vibrator will give you or your partner the upper hand at rocking your world.
It does enhance the sexual experience while delivering a lovely amount of vibration to my clit, making my orgasms much more satisfying...
5Ignoring Your Biggest
Oxytocin, commonly dubbed the "feel good" or "love" hormone, is your orgasm's partner in crime. If your body isn't producing enough of it, climaxing can be more difficult. Stress or anxiety can be a major hindrance in oxytocin production. It can also cause intrusive thoughts that may make it difficult to get into the headspace to reach climax. Whether your brain is preoccupied with all the aspects of your daily life, worried you'll fail at climaxing, or focused on the next big project at work all that mental trapeze work is a guaranteed way to orgasm-block yourself.
Spending ample time with your lover, cuddling on the couch, and kissing have all been proven to boost the production of Oxytocin.
Light BDSM play can also create an intense pleasurable state of arousal by releasing high levels of the same endorphins. This creates a sexy state of relaxation and heightened senses. Fetish toys are a fantastic tool to use to achieve that rush. Whether your partner gives you goosebumps with a soft teaser, leaves their mark with a paddle or whip, or you are bound to the bed and covered in whipped cream the variety of tools and toys available is exhilarating. Ready to choose a pair of perfect cuffs and whips for a big portion of oxytocin? Hop on this guide to BDSM toys.
It really helped to open the doors to better experiences and pure pleasure.