A Handy-Dandy Guide to Penis Pumps: For Men

Cultural and Historical Views on Penis Size

Like I said in the Introduction, "Nothing quite captures our imagination like our cock. Its size, shape and general appearance is a source of endless wonderment." Unfortunately, along with all that wonderment there often comes envy. I suppose if we never had anything to compare it to, our precious willie would be the best darn willie there ever was. That's the beauty of self-love. Funny though how our self-admiration can evaporate when we are confronted with the sight of some other guy swing some heavy pipe (Editor's note: John Holmes' legendary penis was about 10"). This change in mood is pretty predictable. As we shall see, we have been programmed to believe that big is better ever since us men-folk have been able to stand upright and move about on two legs.

Sacred Lingam Of Shiva
Sacred Lingam of Shiva
India
Egiptian Fertility God Min
Egyptian Fertility God Min
Egypt
Obelisk of Thutmose I
Obelisk of Thutmose I
Egypt 1500 BC

Since the time of our cave men ancestors, humans have worshiped the male phallus. At first the representations were nothing more than a crude upright pillar of wood or stone called a lingam. The Egyptians created a more exalted depiction, the obelisk, to represent the sun god, Ra's, dick. The obelisk would morph into the church steeple and the minaret of the mosque, as the dominating religions changed with the ages. When capitalism became the new creed, the steeple and minaret morphed once again into the skyscraper. A simple upright pillar or immense high-rise, they're all statements of virility, power, and prestige. And isn't it just like us to believe that the city with the biggest skyscraper wins. If this "bigger is better" sort of thing has been going on in art, architecture, and religion, you know for sure it's been happening on the individual level too.

Drunk cavorting satyrs
Drunk Cavorting Satyrs
Greece 500-490 BC

From the beginning of recorded time different cultures have designated cock size as an outer sign of a man's inner values. The size of a guy's dong was synonymous with his status, power, masculinity, and sexual potency. Curiously, the ancient Greeks prized a puny penis as the standard of male beauty. A big dick was an object of ridicule. Their mythology saddled the satyrs (woodland creatures with pointy ears, hairy legs, and short goat-like horns) with exaggerated cocks to symbolize their excess and lechery. Aristotle reasoned that a small penis was more fertile than a large one, because the semen didn't have to travel as far and therefore did not cool as much while making its ejaculatory journey. Ya gotta love that Aristotle fella!

Young Man Perseus
Young Man
Greece 500-490 BC
Poseidon throwing a spear
Poseidon Throwing a Spear
Greece 460 BC
Panathenaic amphora
Panathenaic amphora
Greece 480 BC

The Hindus also cherished a tiny endowment. Men with the smallest phallus, 2-3 inches, were the beautiful ideal. They were characterized as lithe and strong. Prodigious penises, 9-10 inches were compared to those of the beasts. And men who possessed them were considered worthless and lazy. Imagine trying to sell these concepts today.

Kamasutra
Kamasutra
India 19 c.
Kamasutra
Kamasutra
India
prince sup Mughal miniature
Indian Prince and Wine Boy
India 18 c.

Except for the Greeks and Hindus, everyone else idolized generous phallic dimensions. For example, so obsessed were the Arabs with the notion of big dick superiority that the Turks of the Ottoman Empire took advantage of this mindset when they successfully conquered them. It was the practice of the Turks to publicly compare the cock size of vanquished Arab leaders with the superior size cocks of their own Turkish commanders. This, in the end, effectively shattered Arab resistance.

Japanese "pillow books", an early form of Asian porn, always depicted the men with exaggerated cocks and this was consistently to the delight of the admiring women.

Sigimura Jihei
Ukiyo-e
Sugimura Jinhei, Japan 17c.
Fishermen Showing Penises Empress Court fishermen shipwrecked on island inhabited by women
Fishermen showing penises to the impress
court on the Island inhibited by women
Japan
Henry VIII
Henry XIII with codpiece
Hans Holbein the Younger
England 1540

In renaissance Europe it was fashionable for men to don a "codpiece," a primitive jockstrap device sewn inside a guy's drawers. The design was obviously intended to emphasize the package. Men of modest endowment, of course, found they had to pad (Editor's note: Here is modern version of package enhancer) their codpiece or be the object of scorn.

Here's a startling statistic: Dr. Barry McCarthy, co-author of Male Sexual Awareness, found that two out of three men believe their dick is smaller than average. Isn't that astonishing? How is that possible? I suppose given this culturally induced big dick bias, it's no wonder why men of almost every historical age and society have been obsessed with disguising their shortcomings, or trying to develop a method to compensate for what they consider to be their inadequacy?

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